How do I explain to hubby

NurseShell · Feb 13, 2003

I love the ideas about being super graphic! That would definitely work! Especially if I describe the 450+ lbs patient I had that I actually had to SEARCH for parts on!!! (I know it's here somewhere!!!) :rotfl:

And, for the record, I did bring home a foley kit cuz he was so obsessed, and you should have seen his face!! I told him it was an "assignment" "HAD to be done" "you don't want my grade to suffer do you?" :chuckle He was so pale I was afraid he might pass out on me!! poor guy. I still have the sealed kit here...maybe I'll bring it out again - show him "how it works".

by the way, I didn't "tell him about my day" he was being nice and rubbing my neck while I worked on a care plan and asked what "d/c foley" meant, then he noticed my pt's age...34...and that's when he started questioning me. oh well!! I know that it's clinical. I know that the poor guy was in so much pain that he didn't give a sh*t who was touch him where. So I wrote it off, but he brings it up occasionally.

Graphic photos and perhaps a video demo ought to cure him for GOOD!!!

NurseShell · Feb 13, 2003

OH!! I forgot to add:

A bunch of us students had a happy hour before Christmas everyone of us said that the No. 1 question we are asked is : What about bathing men? What do you do if...you know...?? Or what do you do if you're cathing someone and "it" happens???

One of my male classmates said: "OK for the record! THAT is NOT going to happen if you are coming at me with at tube! NO friggin' way!!" Another classmate (female) said she told her friends that if it happens during a bath she closes the door and "finishes him off"!!! :rotfl: Apparently that friend has never asked again!! HEE HEE HEE.

Seriously, what do people think we DO all day?!?!

maggie7 · Feb 13, 2003

Tell him you had to apply a Texas catheter and how they're for the REALLY BIG ONES!

emily_mom · Feb 13, 2003

My hubby has never asked, so this thread is pretty funny. I don't think he thinks of nursing in this way (or is just delusional to the fact that I see willies every day)

I'll have to ask him about it...:)

Ariko · Feb 13, 2003

originally posted by skm-nursiepooh
:rotfl:

the perfect solution. not only will your hubby respect you, but he will suddenly get interested in staying healthy himself. just take him to an icu and show him some young studs who did not wear their seatbelts, or had a stroke because of smoking or junk food. explain how they get to keep the foley in for life!!!!!!!!!

debbie17368 · Feb 13, 2003

Is just another body part, no pleasure involved in that. Your husband will eventually understand. My boyfriend is always telling corny jokes about it. hahaha.

howie122832 · Feb 13, 2003

Tell him that the ones that you see are generally "SICK".... so that doesn't interest you... I also like the idea of bring home a foley kit, and offering to try one out on him! I tried (in vain) to get my husband to let me try one on him when I was learning in school... Needless to say... He wanted NO part of THAT!

SmilingBluEyes · Feb 13, 2003

yea discuss every ailment known to male anatomy like testicular cancer, orchiitis (how do you spell that), prostate problems, penile warts, infections, and how awful they can be and maybe he will get the idea how UNsexy male patients are to you. Testicles swollen the size of small melons ARE sexy....not. Like said above, you may increase his conscientiousness concerning his own health, too.

cargal · Feb 13, 2003

And don't forget the candlelight and wine, lots of it, before his

"catherization". And then say, in your husky voice "this will hurt you more than it will me".

I love youz guys! Rotfl

Heather333 · Feb 14, 2003

I only deal with little baby winkies....try cathing one of those!

Heather

SimplePharmBoy · Dec 28, 2004

First of all, I have been married to a nurse for nearly 20 years. And yes, this can be a difficult thing to think about your wife doing at work. I do realize that in a vast majority of cases, nurses are quite professional and really are not 'turned on' by the procedures they perform at work.

As for me, I worked in hosptials and knew what nurses did. That didn't stop me form dating a few here and there. Not much emotional involvement after a date or 2. However, about the time I realized I was really falling hard for my soon to be wife, those procedures were not being done by just a nurse, but (eventually) my fiance. Actually, the first time the wife saw me naked was by accident was when she walked in on me while I was changing in our pool house. I was quite embarrassed, but she said she has seen lots of other naked men before at work, so it was really no big deal and I shouldn't be embarrassed. Not something a man wants to hear, epecially someone you are in love with.

Over this, I almost didn't propose. I did have a long talk with her about this and my feelings and she did answer all my questions hosnestly. The usual....how many have you seen, how many foleys, how often, how many shave preps (and this was before the use of gloves was mandatory and also ALL patients seem to have gotten shaved before surgery!), how many erections....etc. The numbers were lower than my imagination, but I suppose they were correct. (Small hospital and only in nursing for less than a year at that point.) My wife's response to all this was to quietly tranfer to the nursery. Said keeping me was more important that the job. (She now also works peds and loves the kids and newborns!)

Some of you may call me insecure, immature, whatever, but for me this was and sometimes still is an issue. She sometimes gets pulled to adult floors or the PACU. While I realize these are professsional fuctions, all nurses have their share of 'willie' stories and men with erections. I know most are frail and elderly but there is the occasional "28 yo knee with a PCA and foley".

The bottom line is this: being a nurse is way down the list of what she is to me. I see here first as my wife, lover, mother of my kids, etc. Being a nurse is way down the list. Disreagarding the size issue most men have, (ok, most men know thay are not the biggest hammer in the drawer, but having the wife potentially verify that every day is not very reassuring), the issue here is not of the wife getting truned on, but rather that 'the seen one, seen 'em all' concept kicks in. After seeing and/ or touching a few hundred, does the site of your naked husband still excite you? Every time I see my wife naked, I LIKE IT! (nuff said). I just want the same feeling back. I do not want to be another body part.

The suffestions to tell him its just a body part, or seen em all, or practice a foley with him is not good advice. The only thing I can say is listen and talk to him and let him talk and answer his questions truthfully. His imagination is way more that the truth.

Oh, and the reason more men don't seem to care? They don't know! Not many nurses I know are willing to tell all the details. "Today. Dear. I took care of a 28 you man experimenting with Viagra. Ended up with priapism. I had to check on him every 15 minutes to see if he was still hard. Since we had him sedated, I had to try to insert a foley because he kept wetting the bed. One doc suggested digital pressure, but we ended inflating a blood pressure cuff around his member, hoping the pressure would get him down....". Hub would love that?

Honestly, if the wife contined to work with adult patients, I would really be nuts by now, if she wouldn't have divorced me by now.

ell · Dec 28, 2004

Im sick of the site of them, what does he think you are going to do, my lads not like that dump him!! No thats cruel but dont let him get on to you about things like this it comes with the job, he has to accept that.