Published May 16, 2010
PurpleLily
1 Post
I'm a young nurse at a teaching hospital. I like my job and I try not to mix work life with social life. Actually, I'm really good at keeping the two separate from each other.
I've always said that I won't date people I work with...
That said...there is a young resident that is really attractive who keeps flirting with me. He has asked me out a few times...but I have always come up with some lame excuse to not go out. I just think if things don't turn out too well...then I'm sure I'll going to feel the pain later on. Plus, we alllll know how much gossiping goes on in a hospital...
If I met him some where else...then I THINK i would be ok with this...
Anyone have any advice to share? Would you date a doctor from your hospital??
Or am I taking this way too much out of context and making something more complicated than it is.
CNL2B
516 Posts
I wouldn't worry about it too hard. If you want to date him, date him. People meet boyfriends/husbands in the workplace all the time. Remember, he's a resident -- he is probably not rotating on your ward for all that long. I think it would probably be a good idea to tell him you wanted to wait a few weeks, a month, however long it is until he is into another rotation, to date. That would help cut down on the gossip and be a little less distracting for you at work. Just try, as much as you can, to keep your work and your personal life separated. Inevitably, it will leak, but it shouldn't be too terrible if you go about everything in a respectable manner (meaning, don't meet him in his call-room. That goes without saying though!)
brownbook
3,413 Posts
It can cause problems to socialize, make friends, at work. Yet where else are you going to met people with similar interests as you? You are very wise to go slow. Is there are way you could have him join you with your group of friends? Make it a get together on your terms in a group. Keep it casual, keep it in a group, not just you and him together on a date. Go slow. If he is really interested I would think he would agree to these first initial get togethers.
chenoaspirit, ASN, RN
1,010 Posts
Oh, just go for it. People talk, whether you give them a reason to or not. Why care what other say? If they are your true "friends" they wont talk, and those who do arent worthy of worry. If you like each other, why not?
Argo
1,221 Posts
I agree with cheno. Its your life, forget about what all the others think they know about you. Don't put yourself on hold because you are worried about some gossip. I have been married for ten years, never messed around on my wife but the gossip mill has ha me with 10-15 different people throughout the years including my wife when she worked at the hospital with me for a while. I WA cheating on my with.....with my wife. Lmao. People think because you are actually nice to people and get along with the opposite sex That you must be sleeping with them. Who is really the whore is what I wonder.
SCSTxRN
258 Posts
If I weren't married, I would absolutely date a doctor from my hospital. :)
Honeynurse
24 Posts
I've dated a couple doctors from my work and we kept it private. As long as you 2 can agree on that, then the gossip level will be low. Yes, people can speculate, and ask who you are datiing, but you don't have to tell them anything. It's none of their business.
Bill E. Rubin
366 Posts
Hard for me to say since most of the doctors I encounter are about half my age. Then there's the bit about my being married and all.
nursel56
7,098 Posts
I don't see it as a problem, either. But after having worked at two teaching hospitals, and maybe it's a regional thing, but never in my life have I witnessed a greater gossip mill than those two places. At times they took on the air of a multi-generational oral history, as well as your garden variety who's dating who stuff.
I would be pulled aside, someone would whisper, "see that's Rosa there, and she used to go out with "T", but he dumped her and married somebody else and they're divorced but he still wears his wedding ring and. ." oh. . kay. . yeah and Dr. S and Kristina are going out but nobody's supposed to know about it so don't say anything ok anyway he spent the week with his ex-wife when he got sick that time but Kris doesn't know that so. . hahaha I do-not-jest.
Just be careful out there. Best wishes.
healthstar, BSN, RN
1 Article; 944 Posts
Some hospitals do not want that to happen, I know a nurse who was working with a doctor she liked and he told her to quit her job so they could be together without a problem. ( I am not talking about a patient)
Personally, I would not date a doctor from the same floor because you never know how your relationship is going to turn out and I don't want to ruin my career:)
PostOpPrincess, BSN, RN
2,211 Posts
Just go and have fun...
J
Meriwhen, ASN, BSN, MSN, RN
4 Articles; 7,907 Posts
Personally, I wouldn't do it...but that's me. I prefer to minimize the drama I have at work.
If it's not against hospital policy and you are aware of AND accept the ramifications that can come from dating a coworker (e.g., gossip, being around each other so much, working conditions when you two fight/break up, etc.) then go for it. But tread carefully, and make sure your behavior at work is impeccible so you don't add more fuel to the rumor mill or negatively impact your career...that means no slacking off while you two flirt with each other, no rampant PDAs and no make-out sessions in the supply room