Please, you guys who have much more experience in the clinical setting, help me figure out how to deal with patients who flirt or come on to me.
Now, I don't want anyone to get the idea that I'm a super vain person, believing that all the patients I deal with are going to fall madly in love with me. I'm not. However, I am young and attractive, and am getting ready to start a new job where I will have more patient contact. I'm currently in registration, and I have had numerous male patients say rather inappropriate things to me (ie. I ask for phone # for registration purposes, and pt asks for mine in return, etc.) Fortunately, in registration, I get my info and go, so I can just smile, say haha, and leave the room. But next week I'm starting out as a clinical assistant (ED) and I know I'll be dealing with patients for a longer period of time. I love working with people, and I try to make their visit as pleasant as possible. I am very professional both in manner and dress, and I like to get on a personal level with pts so that they feel more comfortable. I like to make conversation while I'm working with my pts, but when someone says something, asks for my phone number, says maybe if they're allowed visitors on admission I can come visit them and make their stay more enjoyable (with a salacious wink), etc. I get so uncomfortable and blush and stammer, and don't know what to say.
Has anyone else experienced these kinds of advances from patients, and if so, what do you do? How do you gracefully dismiss a come on, when you know that in 20 minutes you're going to have to come in and assist the pt with a bedpan???
Please don't confuse this with me being attracted to my patients. I am NOT. I have a wonderful man at home (not married or engaged yet, still waiting on that), and am so happy with him I can't even look at another man in the flirtatious kind of way. But with my town being a college town, and me being approx the same age as a lot of the male pts who come to the ER for doing their stupid macho things that get them hurt, I'm concerned with how I'm going to deal with this. I can't lie and say, oh, I'm married, because I'm not. And the line, "I have a bf" doesn't work, because I've said it, and the come back was, "I don't see a wedding ring - not that that would matter anyways, you know you want me." How do I deal with this without coming across as having a stick up my butt and continue to have a good relationship with my patients??
I'm nervous enough about being able to handle this new job, I don't need this extra worry making me lose my cool and forget everything I learn about how to do my job to the best of my ability. When I get nervous, my hands shake, and seing as I'll be learning phlebotomy, I don't want to miss a vein or further hurt a pt simply because I'm thrown off by someone's inappropriate comments. I've accepted that such things happen in the ER - you can't refuse treatment because someone's been hitting on you, and I don't want to pass off every young guy to someone older that they won't hit on becasue then I look like I'm lazy.
Specializes in MDS coordinator, hospice, ortho/ neuro.
My mother was one of those old nurse battle-axes who'd stomp into the room (when the young pretty nurses were being subjected to this kind of treatment ) and say "What's going on in here? And put that thing away, nobody is interested!"
Please, you guys who have much more experience in the clinical setting, help me figure out how to deal with patients who flirt or come on to me.
Now, I don't want anyone to get the idea that I'm a super vain person, believing that all the patients I deal with are going to fall madly in love with me. I'm not. However, I am young and attractive, and am getting ready to start a new job where I will have more patient contact. I'm currently in registration, and I have had numerous male patients say rather inappropriate things to me (ie. I ask for phone # for registration purposes, and pt asks for mine in return, etc.) Fortunately, in registration, I get my info and go, so I can just smile, say haha, and leave the room. But next week I'm starting out as a clinical assistant (ED) and I know I'll be dealing with patients for a longer period of time. I love working with people, and I try to make their visit as pleasant as possible. I am very professional both in manner and dress, and I like to get on a personal level with pts so that they feel more comfortable. I like to make conversation while I'm working with my pts, but when someone says something, asks for my phone number, says maybe if they're allowed visitors on admission I can come visit them and make their stay more enjoyable (with a salacious wink), etc. I get so uncomfortable and blush and stammer, and don't know what to say.
Has anyone else experienced these kinds of advances from patients, and if so, what do you do? How do you gracefully dismiss a come on, when you know that in 20 minutes you're going to have to come in and assist the pt with a bedpan???
Please don't confuse this with me being attracted to my patients. I am NOT. I have a wonderful man at home (not married or engaged yet, still waiting on that), and am so happy with him I can't even look at another man in the flirtatious kind of way. But with my town being a college town, and me being approx the same age as a lot of the male pts who come to the ER for doing their stupid macho things that get them hurt, I'm concerned with how I'm going to deal with this. I can't lie and say, oh, I'm married, because I'm not. And the line, "I have a bf" doesn't work, because I've said it, and the come back was, "I don't see a wedding ring - not that that would matter anyways, you know you want me." How do I deal with this without coming across as having a stick up my butt and continue to have a good relationship with my patients??
I'm nervous enough about being able to handle this new job, I don't need this extra worry making me lose my cool and forget everything I learn about how to do my job to the best of my ability. When I get nervous, my hands shake, and seing as I'll be learning phlebotomy, I don't want to miss a vein or further hurt a pt simply because I'm thrown off by someone's inappropriate comments. I've accepted that such things happen in the ER - you can't refuse treatment because someone's been hitting on you, and I don't want to pass off every young guy to someone older that they won't hit on becasue then I look like I'm lazy.
HELP PLEASE!!!!!
I haven't had a guy hit on me, but the occasional grandma thinks that I'm "such a nice young man" :)
However DW has run into her share of inappropriate comments, and she has always said "That behavior is inappropriate and won't be tolerated". Nothing too wordy, just simple and to the point.
I forgot to add that you could always wear a wedding band. What people don't know won't hurt 'em. Then they WILL "see a ring on your finger". I know of more than one person who does that.
I almost spat my chocolate shake all over the screen when i read this.
LOL, oh my gosh! I was looking for some suggestions that wouldn't necessarily cause my co-workers to call a psych eval on me..... :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
Hehehhehe, that is a riot!! I wish I had known about that before...
Along the same lines...has anyone ever been approached by inappropriate MD's?? The majority that I work with are wonderful...and then there are the 3...my nightmares. Fortunately switching hospitals helped to eliminate 2...and I occassionaly see the 3rd. So I really don't have to deal with them anymore. One night I was approached in the kitchen area by a Dr that I had already forwarned...long & short of it...he came back that night pale faced apologising up & down saying that he was just joking and he hoped he didn't offend me.
I guess he went home and thought about my reaction to his advance he pulled earlier in the night, and what a sexual harrassment charge could do for his flourishing career.
But just curious to see if anyone else had that problem before and how they handled it.
Maby try one of these they are the rejection hotline. You can check their site out at www.rejectionhotline.com
*Boston
617-861-3962
**New York City
212-660-2245
New Jersey
201-808-6011
Philadelpha
215-618-1505
NEW: Cleveland
216-269-0085
***Miami
305-241-0033
***Orlando
407-338-0036
NEW: ***Tampa
813-273-8160
Phoenix
602-230-4210
Las Vegas
702-386-5397
San Diego
858-492-8002
NEW: San Jose
408-236-2060
New Hampshire
603-413-2340
Rhode Island
401-648-6543
Maine
207-376-0768
Atlanta
770-908-7383
San Francisco
415-356-9833
Denver
303-607-7527
Los Angeles
310-217-7638
Washington DC
202-452-7468
Chicago
773-509-5027
Seattle
206-376-9798
Baltimore
410-347-1488
Virginia
703-912-1725
Detroit
248-262-6861
Houston
713-866-6249
Dallas
972-504-6270
* More Massachusets #s
617-861-3962
508-556-3549
781-654-2925
978-364-8939
413-351-2684
** More New York #s
212-660-2245
718-971-5245
516-730-7245
914-269-4245
845-259-2245
*** More Florida #s
305-241-0033
407-338-0036
813-273-8160
321-844-0033
561-986-0035
954-287-0023
NEW: The Nicer, Kinder, More Subtle and Gentle Rejection Hotline Try This One
Hehehhehe, that is a riot!! I wish I had known about that before...
Along the same lines...has anyone ever been approached by inappropriate MD's?? The majority that I work with are wonderful...and then there are the 3...my nightmares. Fortunately switching hospitals helped to eliminate 2...and I occassionaly see the 3rd. So I really don't have to deal with them anymore. One night I was approached in the kitchen area by a Dr that I had already forwarned...long & short of it...he came back that night pale faced apologising up & down saying that he was just joking and he hoped he didn't offend me.
I guess he went home and thought about my reaction to his advance he pulled earlier in the night, and what a sexual harrassment charge could do for his flourishing career.
But just curious to see if anyone else had that problem before and how they handled it.
Yes, I had a few docs in my time ask me out on the town. Did I go? No!
I found at that one of them was MARRIED, and also DATING his office secretary! JERK!!!:angryfire
JERK!!!:angryfire
fluffwad
262 Posts
My mother was one of those old nurse battle-axes who'd stomp into the room (when the young pretty nurses were being subjected to this kind of treatment ) and say "What's going on in here? And put that thing away, nobody is interested!"