Nursing & Depression - page 37

While visiting in the lounge one day, we discovered that every nurse there was on an anti-depressant. I have had 'Treatment Resistant Depression' for about 20 years--as long as I've been a nurse. ... Read More

  1. by   mattsmom81
    Funny how everyone likes us better when we just put up and shut up, resolve around everyone else's needs and suffer in silence. Our families give us flack when we set limits, and we are dubbed 'problem employees' at work.

    I will keep speaking up though....the silent suffering and self denial is what contributed to my depression, IMO.

    ((((HUGS all)))) and have fun Christmas shopping!!!

    I HATE the malls at Christmas...I feel a bit panic stricken at times in crowded enclosed spaces so I tend to stay away from them..LOL!

    My baby boy turned 21 yesterday so we are celebrating his adulthood!!!! We want them to grow up yet we don't...
  2. by   abrenrn
    Thanks mattsmom. When I'm discouraged, I read what you say, and I feel less alone.

    As to "be depressed, don't worry" - it sounds to me like some people think there are only two ways to be - depressed or worried. To avoid worry, they try to make all those around them depressed. Most peculiar days indeed, sonny. And I won't have it. Stop trying. Anyone who does that should be scared.

    Doesn't help to ignore those dark, destructive voices. If you do, they take over.
  3. by   sanakruz
    Hi all- Ive been away for awhile but am glad I returned. I was feeling angry, at some posts and posters, angry at my boss, myself, my co-workers. Enraged sometimes.
    I believe, for me, this is a serious symptom and I should DEAL WITH IT.
    I would have to describe myself as more depressed than I have been in 15 years. My symptoms:
    Irritability, impatience and angry flair ups.
    Difficulty falling asleep (largely due do agitation from above symptom)
    Difficulty staying asleep- primarily due to night sweats and/or hot flashes
    Eating when I'm not hungry
    Crying without triggers (this is flipping me out)
    Lack of ability to get into the spirit of the season (not typical)
    Homesickness- I have lived in California for 17 tears and I want to go "home"....
    Inappropriate guilt-( this is typical)
  4. by   sanakruz
    Any way what I guess I need is diagnostic feedback. I'm considering antidepressants, but feel wary because of my position at the county mental health clinic! Maybe I'm just absorbing the negative stuff I see on a daily basis.... Help! I forgot to mention I'm also feeling an unfamiliar indesiviveness
  5. by   KarenKidsRN
    Hey psychnurse, those symptoms sound awfully familiar to me. The irritability is often an early sign that I am heading for a crash.
    It sounds like some of it could be menopause related though and the symptoms are similar, Don't know what your take is on HRT, but for myself I would rather be on antidepressants than hormones.( I have a mom who is a breast cancer survivor with indications that the HRT is what caused it.) So if treating the menopausal symptoms in whichever way you choose isn't helping and you have had a physical and had things like thyroid levels checked then I'd say after that it's time to consider antidepressants or least get a consult to find out if the doc thinks you could benefit from them.

    As far as work goes, who has to know? My personal medical issues are PERSONAL and are not for my supervisors or co workers to be aware of. I lost my last job after they found out a psychaitrist signed my time off from work papers when I was going through a bad time and I will NEVER volunteer that information again to anyone.

    As soon as the manager found out I was seeing a psychiatrist her whole attitude changed and she did everything she could to make my life more miserable, and then she blamed me for the problems! I would not even have believed it if it hadn't happened to me. Very sad to me but the stigma still exists and I have to protect myself and my future earnings potential as I have no one else to rely on for support.
  6. by   sanakruz
    Thanks Karen-
    No,no HRT for me. "Crash" is a word I definately relate to these days. Think I'm going to ask my doc for something. Will check back in a few weeks.
  7. by   mattsmom81
    (((HUGS)))) Karen...yes the stigma is alive and very careful who you share your personal business with I've learned.

    Psychnurse, you have described my symptoms perfectly with your list. I am on the way 'out of the pit' thank God....but still have some backslide days.

    I agree some of it is hormonal but I won't take HRT either. I've heard some herbal remedies help with the night sweats, etc. for some women. Estroven helps several of my girlfriends.

    My sx are multifaceted in cause I discovered. 2 MVA's, 2 surgeries, ABX, GI leaky gut,body flora out of whack, toxic body, hypothyroidism, chronic pain and stress and family predisposition for depression. I had to work on them ALL and still am....trying to get well is hard work.

    It's also hard for us as nurses to admit we need help sometimes, I've found....but we deserve the same care we give our patients.

    Good luck and let us know how you are doing. (((HUGS))))
  8. by   mario_ragucci
    Originally posted by abrenrn
    As to "be depressed, don't worry" - it sounds to me like some people think there are only two ways to be - depressed or worried. To avoid worry, they try to make all those around them depressed. Most peculiar days indeed, sonny. And I won't have it. Stop trying. Anyone who does that should be scared.
    I just caught this. Hey abrenrn, I am on the side of understand and halping...not critisizing. I meant it's strange to be bombed with so much advertizing for cars and cell phones...that's strange. Not people. I'm a person too.

    Scared is the way I feel when I try to be myself around some people and they start barking at me. I can sense some people are listing in their mental balance, want to help, and get scared because if I try to say anything, I'll get my head bitten off.

    abrenrn, consider some go-lightly for your feelings and get them out of ya :-) :kiss
  9. by   KarenKidsRN
    mattsmom, wow what you've been through is enought to depress anyone!
    I am currently doing great. Losing the job lead me into trying something I have always wanted to do, travel nursing and so far I am loving it. Plan to travel for the next 2-3 years at least and check out all the places I've ever wanted to go before I settle down somewhere again.

    I extended my first assignment and so had to find a doc in my new city which was a little scary but has worked out ok. I do not plan to risk altering my current med regime which is working so well at any time in the near future, so if I stay anywhere more than 3 months I have to find a new doctor but that is a small price to pay for emotional stability. My meds were one of the reasons I was hesitant to try traveling until a wise counselor pointed out the obvious to me, other cities do have psychaitrists and you can probably find one whereever you are. So am now healthy and loving life again, thanks to effexor.
  10. by   abrenrn

    I listen to you and start wondering, is it a symptom of depression or is it a normal reaction to what is happening around you?

    For the first time in as long as I can remember I have not been depressed, for close to a year and a half. During that time, I learned why I became depressed. From family on, I was blamed for any problems that happened, mostly ones I had nothing to do with. It's very stressful to feel that way. It depletes stress neurotransmittors. Which is why I needed meds.

    Now, I'm very careful with monitoring myself. Am I irritable because I'm depressed or am I irritable because of an irritant I can't do anything about? Lately, I find when I'm irritable, there is a pretty good reason. Now, instead of just taking it, I do what I can to get rid of the irritant. When I do, my irritability goes.

    With your screen name, I assume you've worked psych. Psych is tough because, once labeled "depressed" many normal reactions are seen as abnormal. A while ago, several reporters got themselves committed to state hospitals, faked symptoms, to get stories. Once they got the stories, they tried to get out. Guess what? They couldn't - not for a long time. They were labled grandiose, delusional and medicated. It usually took contacting editors and other people to get out.

    I assumed they behaved logically and rationally when they told their stories. But, having been labeled with a psychiatric disease, nothing they said mattered.

    I think we have to be careful before we say these are only symptoms. But, we have to be careful about not suspecting they are symptoms too.

    Biggest question to ask, "are you thinking about hurting yourself or someone else?" If so, get help fast. Otherwise, ask for advice, seek counsel, it is not an emergency. It's always bad to diagnose something too quickly.

    Just my opinion.

    Karen - read over this thread. For some reason, there are lots of psychiatrists who refuse to prescribe meds even though the patient is stable. They insist the patient switch to their med du jour. I think that's malpractice myself.
  11. by   KarenKidsRN
    Karen - read over this thread. For some reason, there are lots of psychiatrists who refuse to prescribe meds even though the patient is stable. They insist the patient switch to their med du jour. I think that's malpractice myself.
    I agree. I interviewed my new doc on the phone and asked if she would be comfortable with just continuing to prescribe what I am currently stable on. The catch is that I am on a higher than normally recommended maximum dose, but it is the only thing that has worked this well and this long for me. If she had said no I think I would have looked for another doc, or caught a quick plane home to my old doc just to get my prescription for another 3 months. One of my biggest requirements in finding a doc or therapist is someone who will listen. I fired my first psychiatrist because he got in the habit of just rewriting the same prescription and wouldn't listen when I tried to tell him I didn't think it was working anymore. So I got a referal to someone else the next time I needed an appointment. When it comes to mental health care insurance doesn't cover much anyway. I'll pay out of pocket if I have to get the help I need. It's worth it.
  12. by   mattsmom81
    Wow Anne..that story about the reporters and what happened to them really struck a nerve with me!!

    So true how we get a 'label' or get into a 'role' and that's where we get stuck sometimes..
  13. by   abrenrn
    The story about the reporters is true - I read it a long time ago in the back pages of a newspaper and more recently in a book about a woman with schizophrenia. The conclusion of the book, by the way, was that if the disease had been recognized early and treated aggressively, it probably would not have become chronic - but I forget the name of the book. One I do remember, is Eden Express, by Mark Vonnegut, son of Kurt. He had a very severe episode of schizophrenia in his early twenties. Lucky for him, it was treated aggressively with something that worked. I hear he went on to become a psychiatrist. Hope he's still doing OK.

    I think much the same with depression. I know in many ways, anything I mentioned that a doctor did not like was labeled a symptom. Some were, most weren't. Had someone treated me appropriately and aggressively when I was 19 years old, I doubt I ever would have become a "treatment-resistent, chronic depressive."

    I still hope for a cure. I think I'm on my way.