Getting my life back

GucciBeaR143, BSN · Mar 25, 2015

WOW! I have to say that I think I pretty much had a little bit of your life while working FT and going to school then straight to 1 year trauma internship, all the while driving to & fro from Houston, TX to GA to see my husband stationed there. It was more than challenging at times, but I did find balance doing yoga, adopting 3 cats, and leaving work or school where they belong. The thing is, I agree with you. 100 % In regards to re-evaluation goals and going to work a "monster." I saw that with my co-workers. They would work ALL the time and miss out on living in the house they are trying to pay for and not spend quality time with the kids. I grew up being told this is the sacrifice, though... I am a hardworking NURSE's daughter. She worked nights for 40+ years of critical care and just recently went to day shift in a clinic. I don't think she realized how much she was missing out until us kids told her. Although I have a lot of respect for those who can hold a second PRN or agency let alone one FT position, like you, I don't think they are living healthy or happy.

On another note, congratulations on having more fun ;P with the hubby and family/dogs. Time to catch up on all the reading/movies you missed =)

carachel2 · Mar 25, 2015

::::applause applause::::

As nurses and now as NPs, there are soooo many opportunities to allow you what you want to get out of your career. They almost all come with a tradeoff and only you can balance what is important to you and only you can reflect on your current life, lifestyle needs and desires in order to balance all that out. There is no excuse in the career to "accept your fate."

eldragon · Mar 25, 2015

I think you were working with my last boss. She spoke to me the exact same way. She was a loon. She cried all the time. She jacked with schedules just because she could. She would talk about my co-workers to me, and probably vice versa. She couldn't remember what she told someone from one minute to the next. I quickly learned that talking to her about anything was a waste of time. The last straw, and there were many, was when everyone's payroll was wrong: she had gone in and deleted a couple of days from every single nurses paycheck. I confronted her because nobody else had the guts. She asked me "what are you going to do about it?" I finished my shift and turned in my badge. That's what I did about it.

Since then I have regretted acting so hastily because I don't have a reference, obviously. That job was a mistake from the beginning and I knew I shouldn't have taken it, but I did. The moral of the story is to go with your gut. When you feel like a job isn't going to work, it won't.

brandy1017, ASN, RN · Mar 26, 2015

I think you were working with my last boss. She spoke to me the exact same way. She was a loon. She cried all the time. She jacked with schedules just because she could. She would talk about my co-workers to me, and probably vice versa. She couldn't remember what she told someone from one minute to the next. I quickly learned that talking to her about anything was a waste of time. The last straw, and there were many, was when everyone's payroll was wrong: she had gone in and deleted a couple of days from every single nurses paycheck. I confronted her because nobody else had the guts. She asked me "what are you going to do about it?" I finished my shift and turned in my badge. That's what I did about it.
Since then I have regretted acting so hastily because I don't have a reference, obviously. That job was a mistake from the beginning and I knew I shouldn't have taken it, but I did. The moral of the story is to go with your gut. When you feel like a job isn't going to work, it won't.

I think you should contact the state over not being paid your full wages that you are due! Also apply for unemployment given the circumstances of your leaving was because she intentionally shortened your pay. Sounds like an investigation is in order from the state! Back pay for you and all the others and hopefully some damages to discourage her from doing this again!

reddgirl · Mar 27, 2015

I feel they same way at my current place of employment. I'm 7 months in a I am more burnt than a struck match! I just can not give anymore! I have also started apllying elsewhere and I asked a couple of my colleagues to give me a reference because I do not trust my MD as far as I can throw her! I'm tired of pulling knives out of my back. It becomes a little mundane after awhile. I feel more like a personal secretary than a NP. Sometimes I just feel so defeated and if you "defy" them, your head will roll!

steffyh · Mar 27, 2015

I think you should contact the state over not being paid your full wages that you are due! Also apply for unemployment given the circumstances of your leaving was because she intentionally shortened your pay. Sounds like an investigation is in order from the state! Back pay for you and all the others and hopefully some damages to discourage her from doing this again!

I would love nothing more than to report my former employer for not paying us accordingly. They would tell us to email them "35 hours pt time, 5 hours charting" but that was never the case. If you were to go back and see when we logged in and out of their EMR you would see how many TRUE and ACCURATE hours we worked. Problem is, if you file a claim, you need to let the state know who you are and my concern is that if she were to counter-sue me (although I would be reporting for all of us) that she could ruin me b/c she can afford a lawyer and I can't. It's a double-edged sword.

Jules A, MSN · Mar 27, 2015

I feel more like a personal secretary than a NP.

That is lousy. I have had to set boundaries at some of the places I have worked but usually it is with the nurse mgr who thinks I'll be taking vitals and giving long acting injections which I won't. After clearing that up immediately I have had no problems and never any problems from the physicians I have worked with. Now that you are more experienced you can outline exactly what tasks you will and won't be responsible for before starting your next position. I continue to stand by the mantra that if they wouldn't ask a doc to do it don't ask me.

Good luck with the job hunt!

reddgirl · Mar 27, 2015

Thanks Jules A!!

Chocolate_RN85 · Mar 27, 2015

Wow what a great post! To think everyday I'm thinking the exact same thing. Mad of fact I see my directors and I don't see myself at 70yrs old working for a home care agency:no: at that age (God willing) I wiill be sipping on a pina colada in hawaii! Life is about a balance, thats is the main reason I chose PMHNP route. All of my collegues that are PMNHP seat in a desk all day after 3pm just looking at a magazine or car. I'm not saying that every PMHNP position will the same but out ofall the specialties it is the one that best fits the next 30 years of my life. Yea.....I'm looking to retire no later then 55 yrs, maybe earlier. life is too short, people or dying over a skin infection, you think after all the hard work all the sweat in nursing school, I want to die over a stroke or MI! no thank you:no:.Key word: Balance. whatever route you decide, know this theres a bettter job out there.. always.

Thanks for your post!

Jules A, MSN · Mar 28, 2015

Wow what a great post! To think everyday I'm thinking the exact same thing. Mad of fact I see my directors and I don't see myself at 70yrs old working for a home care agency:no: at that age (God willing) I wiill be sipping on a pina colada in hawaii! Life is about a balance, thats is the main reason I chose PMHNP route. All of my collegues that are PMNHP seat in a desk all day after 3pm just looking at a magazine or car. I'm not saying that every PMHNP position will the same but out ofall the specialties it is the one that best fits the next 30 years of my life. Yea.....I'm looking to retire no later then 55 yrs, maybe earlier. life is too short, people or dying over a skin infection, you think after all the hard work all the sweat in nursing school, I want to die over a stroke or MI! no thank you:no:.Key word: Balance. whatever route you decide, know this theres a bettter job out there.. always.
Thanks for your post!

I'm with you 100% about not working until I'm too old and mangled to enjoy a retirement but I have to say I don't know of any psych-NPs who are sitting around reading magazines. I am a high energy, intense type person who has worked or been in work+school an average of 50+hours a week for 30 years and none of my previous jobs were as difficult as working as a NP.

I truly didn't think physicians worked all that hard but I was wrong. They crank it out and I am responsible for having the same productivity. The differences from floor nursing is mostly the increased amount of mental stress and level of responsibility. If anyone wants to be a NP because they think the work is so much easier I will share that has not been my experience. Hopefully others will write in if I'm wrong because I'd like to find that job where I can sit around reading magazines too! :)

carachel2 · Mar 28, 2015

Wow what a great post! To think everyday I'm thinking the exact same thing. Mad of fact I see my directors and I don't see myself at 70yrs old working for a home care agency:no: at that age (God willing) I wiill be sipping on a pina colada in hawaii! Life is about a balance, thats is the main reason I chose PMHNP route. All of my collegues that are PMNHP seat in a desk all day after 3pm just looking at a magazine or car. I'm not saying that every PMHNP position will the same but out ofall the specialties it is the one that best fits the next 30 years of my life. Yea.....I'm looking to retire no later then 55 yrs, maybe earlier. life is too short, people or dying over a skin infection, you think after all the hard work all the sweat in nursing school, I want to die over a stroke or MI! no thank you:no:.Key word: Balance. whatever route you decide, know this theres a bettter job out there.. always.
Thanks for your post!

Is this written by someone with a graduate degree?

I've done clinical experiences with some great psych NPs. Were they sitting ? YES. Was it one of THE most stressful jobs ever? In my opinion it was. There is so much that goes into a solid, safe psych assessment and I highly doubt they are sitting there scrolling online through "a magazine or car."