Getting hit on at work?

Nurses General Nursing

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I've had some funny experiences getting hit on by patient's families/friends in the past few months and wanted to share and hear your stories too! The most recent one that spawned this thread was last night, I had about a 2 minute conversation with a cowoker's patient's friend and this morning I had a friend request from him on Facebook. Hadn't told him my name or anything but somehow he found me with is totally creeperish. Another one happened a few months ago where my patient's son slept in her room overnight (which isn't allowed but they insisted so I let him stay to help suction her) and every time I came in the room all night long he'd wake up and try to talk to me about one thing or the other and was asking all these questions about if I was dating someone and eventually asked me if he could take me out to breakfast. I said no because...that's wierd. The other one was in my first few weeks of working here and my patient's son immediately latched on to me as soon as I came on shift and was saying all this crazy stuff to his dad like "this is the girl i'm gonna marry" and "look how beautiful she is, she's the one!". He even made me turn around by asking a question and tried to take a picture of me. Mind you, this was all after I'd already made it clear that I was not interested or available. It made for an extremely uncomfortable night. Anyways, I just wanted to share...post up some of your awkward stories!

unless you've actually been stalked, you have no idea how unflattering, unwelcome or undeserved such attentions are. compliment it is not. it's more as though someone senses a vulnerability in you and sets out to exploit that. it truly is sad that so many people who haven't been through it, though, could fail to believe those of us who have and tell us to "just shrug it off."

i agree. there is no gracious way to say "you're scaring me, and i'm pretty sure you're doing it on purpose." not all attempts have bad intentions, but the intentions are not the recipient's problem. when you're dishing out whatever you think is a compliment, you leave yourself vulnerable to interpretation.

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

No recent experiences of my own except oh wait! That's right! I arrived at the hospital to be with my mom last summer and to my utter and complete mortification found myself to be actually in one of "those" families - something to do with the cute ICU nurse and bachelor brother. Even Mom would rally at the mention of this poor girl's name and say she thought June was a lovely month for a wedding. Oh God. No. At least she had been moved out of ICU that morning. I tried to educate - but again - noncompliant. Luckily most of it she didn't hear and I only caught one glimpse of her sorta nervous smile as our herd made it down the hallway.

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no one said anything about "sexual" comments. Since when are compliments always sexual, or necessarily sexual??? Some PC people take all compliments as unwanted sexual advances. Can't there just be a positive comment?

The title of the thread is "getting hit on at work." That's what the context is here, and people are describing situations that aren't neutral compliments. So please don't accuse me of having the wrong context here.

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I tried not wearing make-up to work, that failed.

Now I detour advances by telling them I have 6 kids :D Works every time!

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Specializes in CVICU, anesthesia.

Ps. I feel sorry for the pretty nurses working in a mental hospital though,once during my clinicals I was following a gorgeous Indian nurse and she got hit on by a sociopath.

During my psych clinical there was one patient who was always very friendly with me (an older man). I was friendly back, but never spoke to him much. He would repeatedly say, "Hey, you, I like you!" Every time he saw me. I really didn't think much of it until he started telling me and the other students that I reminded him of his wife. At first I thought it was sweet...until I found out that he MURDERED his wife! :eek: From then on I kept serious distance!!!

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When i was a charge nurse at a large hospital, i often got hit on by older men, usually medical doctors, though. Once i met a nice looking 70 year old italian man with a thick accent, who came in every weekend for IVT via picc line. The first time i met him he said, "Oh, i love your body, you can come to my house, i have a big bed and please come over soon, i'm rich and will wine and dine you, you are hot, baby." I was speechless, pretending i didn't hear him. Later that day his wife came to pick him up--a bleach-blonde gal with fake boobies and plumped up lips, who was 20 years younger. She gave me dirty looks. Another time a doctor grabbed me in the elevator and gave me a wet lip-lock and said don't you like african men?--didn't report him but told him, "Don't EVER do that again! Once a tall, gorgeous Indian doc grabbed me around the waist as i gave mouth care to a comatose patient; his hands moving toward my breasts. I yelled "help" and staff came rushing in. I said the patient was about to code. Doc made a hasty retreat. Another Doc hugged me after i had been on vacation for two weeks and planted a loud wet one on my neck in front of everyone in the nurse's station. Everyone gasped and he quickly left with his tail between his legs. Whenever i gained 20 pounds and stopped wearing make-up the attention stopped. Whenever i lost 20 pounds and started wearing makeup the attention resumed. Straightened hair also garnered lots of attention. Curly hair not sexy enough i guess. Doctors ignore me when i am overweight. They are as transparent as jelly fish and very shallow.

That's all men,not just doctors.Most men are after your looks.

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During my psych clinical there was one patient who was always very friendly with me (an older man). I was friendly back, but never spoke to him much. He would repeatedly say, "Hey, you, I like you!" Every time he saw me. I really didn't think much of it until he started telling me and the other students that I reminded him of his wife. At first I thought it was sweet...until I found out that he MURDERED his wife! :eek: From then on I kept serious distance!!!

Lord this is scary for real!! Oh my God,I would like totally freak out.On my last day of psych unit there was this newly admitted patient who just kept starring at me and starring through the glass-I knew he had the hots for me cause he was smiling and giving me long stares.Thank God it was my last day.I dont know how psych nurses can deal with this kind of sexual harrasments.

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This really creepy new guy who worked in another department at my hospital (not nursing) kept trying to talk to me but I'd just say hello and go on about my business. Then when I had a day off he'd tell me he missed me, which sounded an alarm with me, so I'd go out of my way to avoid him. Then he started turning up places I go in my neighborhood like the market and restaurants. I thought if I just ignored him he'd go away but I was so naiive. Came home from work one day, came back out with my dog a few minutes later, and this creep was standing in my driveway next to my car! I called the police but he decided to leave on his own. Anyway, a few days later he was rearrested

Wow what a stalker I wonder how he got your adress????

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I'm loving the stories, thanks for posting everyone! The feeling I got from my "suitors" (be it that they were all young men) was that they were just impressed that I was a young cute intelligent person with a very important job. And of course there's that HORRIBLY wrong assumption created by the media that nurses are sexy. Seriously? There's not many jobs in the world that I find less sexy. And the whole shrug it off/take it serious line was crossed for me when that dude tried to take a picture of me. I yelled at him and told him to put it away immediately.

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