Help: My Nursing Instructor is a Bully!

goodstudentnowRN · Nov 28, 2008

I have been there my friend! I have gotten my share of being treated like a child and being degraded. Now, I am at a school where most of the Instructors treat the students with respect. I hate it when these instructors behave like little Gods. They seem to forget that they were students too and some of them do not know what to do when they are in the hospital because they have not worked there for a long time.

I would ignore this instructor and only speak to her when it is extremely necessary. I honestly do not encourage petty talk with my instructors because they can be very hypocritical and mean. As soon as I am assigned my patients, I disappear in thin air until I am ready to give my medication. I always find something to do in my patients' room. Keep the faith my dear it will soon be over!

Kevin RN08 · Nov 28, 2008

Without any specifics, I (we) can't interpret what may be going on. But I will say, I had the blessing of having the "Clinical Drill Instructor" as an instructor for first level. Yes I said it was a blessing, I learned more in that 5 weeks of clinical than any other semester thus far, she challenged us, was thorough, fair, and very demanding. Yes, she made 2 students cry because they weren't sufficiently prepared. Yes, I got nervous about my knowledge of my meds, my careplan, the pt's disease process. It beats the tar out of what I am experiencing now, with an instructor that has yet to ask me a med question, about a disease process, or why I would do this or that to a pt with X.

At any rate, on the floor you'll have to deal with demanding, needy patients and families. And believe it or not pts and family will ask harder questions and comments than your CIs (with good reason), "what is this med?", "why do I need that?", "I take that at 8am, not 10am (or noon), why are you changing my schedule?", "it hurts to turn, cough, deep breath, I'm not going to do it", the list is endless you get the point.

One track you could take is to ask questions about your progress, get a feel of where the instructor thinks you are and if you are progressing. And finally, ask your questions in the med room not the pt's room, and always have a med book handy (that's real life). If your CI is like mine was you are prepared by the time you get to the pt room, put on your confident face and do what you've gotta do.

Lovely_RN, MSN · Nov 28, 2008

Stay as far away from this instructor as you possibly can and when have to be in her presence only speak when spoken to. It seems like she has a lot of power and it also seems as if your school's administration is aware and supports her behavior. So what can you do?

suzy253, RN · Nov 28, 2008

i agree with Kevin on this one. Two years in and it sounds like she's preparing you for the real world of nursing. Yes, she is challenging you and you will deal with some really difficult people in the real world. I'm only 2 years into nursing and believe me, family members can be brutal.

I had an instructor who had this type of reputation and now when I see her with her current students on clinical rotations in my hospital, I thank her from the bottom of my heart for making me the nurse I am today.

Aneroo, LPN · Nov 29, 2008

Without any specifics, I (we) can't interpret what may be going on. But I will say, I had the blessing of having the "Clinical Drill Instructor" as an instructor for first level. Yes I said it was a blessing, I learned more in that 5 weeks of clinical than any other semester thus far, she challenged us, was thorough, fair, and very demanding. Yes, she made 2 students cry because they weren't sufficiently prepared. Yes, I got nervous about my knowledge of my meds, my careplan, the pt's disease process. It beats the tar out of what I am experiencing now, with an instructor that has yet to ask me a med question, about a disease process, or why I would do this or that to a pt with X.
At any rate, on the floor you'll have to deal with demanding, needy patients and families. And believe it or not pts and family will ask harder questions and comments than your CIs (with good reason), "what is this med?", "why do I need that?", "I take that at 8am, not 10am (or noon), why are you changing my schedule?", "it hurts to turn, cough, deep breath, I'm not going to do it", the list is endless you get the point.
One track you could take is to ask questions about your progress, get a feel of where the instructor thinks you are and if you are progressing. And finally, ask your questions in the med room not the pt's room, and always have a med book handy (that's real life). If your CI is like mine was you are prepared by the time you get to the pt room, put on your confident face and do what you've gotta do.

I agree! Now that I am practicing, I have a lot of respect for the woman- sure, I think she targeted certain people, and I hated her classes. But she's smart, an educator at heart (I hated getting in groups or the other silly things we did in class, but realize now she was trying to reach everyone, not just the ones who learned through lecture, and wanted us to THINK). She is a total patients advocate and if that means stepping on your toes, then so be it.

That being said, at the time, I hated her guts. I'd skip her class and just read the book instead, since we usually we discussing stuff instead of lecture (not my learning style). I didn't have her until the final semester for psych! I steered clear of her, and when I went to class, I laid low. No asking questions, no making myself known to her. LOL

She tended to respect the senior nursing students more than the freshman, so that helped some as well. LOL

Daytonite, BSN, RN · Nov 29, 2008

How do you deal with a nursing instructor who is a bully, uses intimidation tactics, has an enormous amount of power and is completely unprofessional and unfair? I find myself "blacklisted" for no reason. . .Any advice or encouragement would be appreciated. Thanks.

When they say, "Jump!" you say, "How high?" You say, "Yes, ma'am", and take what ever bones they throw you. You are the slave and they are the master. As long as you maintain your place the worst shouldn't happen. You must kowtow to people like this because they are authoritarians and hold the reins of power. You stand in the back and hope they don't notice you. If they make a mistake pray its a big one, get proof, go for it and try to clip their wings.

Freedom42 · Nov 29, 2008

There's a big difference between a demanding instructor who insists that you rise to the occasion and a bully who operates by demeaning and intimidating students. To suggest that intimidation tactics prepare students for the "real world" is ludicrous. Administrators who allow such rude behavior to continue despite repeated complaints are simply teaching students that such behavior is acceptable. And then we wonder why so much is written about horizontal violence in the workplace.

MOLLBEE · Nov 29, 2008

Just to clarify . . . this nursing instructor is not my clinical instructor; what she did has nothing to do with pushing me to make me better or to prepare me (well, maybe prepare me for the fact that there are difficult and rotten people in this world). What she did is more along the lines of what you would see in highschool. I am just absolutely appalled that this instructor is allowed to treat people this way with no consequences for her unprofessional, bad behavior. Like I said before, she is paid to teach me--not bully me. If I posted what this instructor actually did, you would all be shocked.

Daytonite, BSN, RN · Nov 29, 2008

Frankly, there's not much more we can say when you can only speak in generalities. My mother was like Judge Judy with a belt in one hand and a broom in the other. And she went after us kids mercilessly and unfairly. All we could do was keep out of her way. That's what you do with a bully--stay out of their way and when they are near you don't do anything to aggravate them. If you do try to stand up to a bully you do so at your own peril. They hold the reins of power over you. End of story.

BethulieRN · Nov 29, 2008

I also had a nasty and evil instructor who made my journey a living hell in my second semester of nursing school and found out that she failed me the last day of shool after finishing all clinical rotations. The reasons she gave, I was not ready. I cried and sobbed over this, but I never given up. I applied to other schools and I was accepted as an advancement placement to another wonderful school that treated me with respect and dignity. I finally graduated in May 08 , passed my boards in July and I am a new nurse grad now.

You have to hang in there, there is nothing you can do other that kiss her ass. Its hard to do, but remember chances are you will not have her next Semester. T

If your intuitions are right, then I will recommend while still hanging in there to start applying to other school as these programs have a dead line to apply for their program. If you survive then never mind those applications.

Like I said hang in there.

dusky1228 · Nov 29, 2008

hi mollbee. i can so sympathize with you. i went through that when i was in nursing school many years ago. that instructor had a reputation for singling one student out in each year's class and making their life a living h***. i even went to the counselor and *she* even told me that. i had all good evaluations, did very well in all the classes, then i got to hers, and she nitpicked and harrased constantly. she even would do my drug card tests at the end of our evening clinical for me at about 10:30 at night, when i had been in class all day and doing clinical for evening shift. all the other students got their drug card test at 2 pm, and the beginning of the shift. and i got the really remote, weird side effects and really obscure questions that she wanted answers to. she would say nasty and cruel things to me-she even told me that i would "kill someone some day"! she could be downright vicious, and would hold failure of the semester over my head constantly. i started smoking during her rotation (i stopped right after that, thank goodness!)

i just grit my teeth and smiled, and managed to get through.

and my best poetic justice was that *after* i graduated, i was working on a med-surg unit. in those days, people were admitted to the hospital the night before surgery. one evening, shortly after i got my rn, i come in to work evening shift, and guess who i have as a preop patient? yes, my former nemesis instructor! she turned ghostly pale! and i did all the preop stuff that needed to be done, including preop and post op instructions, sweetly and efficiently, and the whole time she was sweating bullets about what i might do. it actually was quite funny, because you could see the concern in her face. i never would have done or said anything unprofessional, but i guess i stressed her out with kindness.