You guys need some stress relief

  1. Ok it's quite obvious from reading around that this forum has many people feeling like this :angryfire all day, so for your sanity as well as the people around you, please check out this website:

    http://www.mindtools.com/stress/Defenses/IntroPage.htm

    It has all the information you need about stress and its harmful effects, as well as how to deal with it. One technique I didn't see on there which I like to do personally is to take out my stress physically. I do it by punching my punching bag at home, but there are other ways. Squeeze a stress ball, play a loud instrument, scream at your husband and kids or beat them, kick the dog, etc. No I'm kidding about the last part, it wouldn't be nice to hurt a little dog!

    I'll tell you guys right now that using this forum isn't a good way to deal with the stress. I see that when people vent here, they kind of twist their story in subtle ways so that they're the innocent victim and the rest of the world is screwing them over. Then others people jump in to support them and add to the vent. A 20 page snowball of negativity soon follows! I see this pattern emerge in almost every single thread in the general area. This is real bad guys, negative thoughts should be avoided as much as possible. Sharing them with others just lets you dwell on them even more. Practice stress relief techniques to deal with the problem and let it be forgotten before you know it.

    Ok that's it, now go up and go check out the website above or I'll put dynamite on you!

    Alpha
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    About Alpha13

    Joined: Jul '05; Posts: 152; Likes: 4

    8 Comments

  3. by   sister--*
    Alpha13, What a great resource! Thanks for sharing it.

    I have to disagree with you, however, on the point of venting here on the board. It allows us an initiation into solving our own difficulties. When we write things/situations we are passionate about...tainted or not...it is revealing; definately to others, and if we're honest, to ourselves as well.

    Your post reminds me of Maslow's Heirarchy. I believe you've just reached a higher level of functioning than I have when dealing with stress.

    I'm so happy that you've pointed out the next step! I know that many times I need that direction to climb to the next level.

    Thanks for pointing the way!
  4. by   sissiesmama
    Hello -- I got up with my husband to see him off when I got online and found your post. I did want to bring up a few points, but I'll try to keep it brief. I have been a nurse for 16 years, and my husband has been one for 21 years. We have both worked in a wide variety of settings, from ER, ICU, psych, ect. My husband is a nsg supervisor at a large hospital. We do see quite a few days at work that are stressful, but we have learned to deal with it in a constructive way. And I know you were joking, but we have 2 sons and 3 dogs and have not beat, kicked, ect. any of them. The thought of beating the kids has crossd my mind, but not from my work stress, but from calls from the principal, teacher, angry neighbor, ect. (And please remember I am joking!)

    I have not been a member of this site for very long. I jioned within the last 6 months, but even from the posts I have read in the time since joining, I do beg to differ with your statement that this site is not a good way of dealing with stress. Even just this morning, I read a post about a woman in nursing school that coded her husband in their living room. She needed to talk, needed to have someone listen to her, and offer even just a little bit of reassurance in her treatment of him at home waiting for EMS to arrive. Other posts that I have seen include student nurses asking for input from other more seasoned nurses regarding different hospitals in their area, or specialty areas they may be thinking about seeking.

    I could go on and on, but I don't want to take up too much space, and I sure dont want to seem like I am venting after reading your post, but I had to say something. One way of relief by nurses after a horrible day is debriefing. I have personally been involved in this type of relief, and maybe it's just my opinion, but a lot of times that works for us.

    I just don't think that you should be able to lump all of us together and say that the froum is not a good way to deal with stress.And I hope you don't take this the wrong way and think I'm twisting anything around while responding to you.And it's just my opinion, but most of the postings have helped th poster, and the readers. You may want to read a little deeper in some other thraeds before you just make a blanket opinion that almost every sngle thread is the same.

    By the way, I did click on the link listed on your posting, and I was not impressed! I did not spend a lot of time pouring over it, and I am sure it will help some people , but it's not for everyone, just as this site is not for everyone, I'm sure, but that is not your call.

    :wink2: Anne RNC
  5. by   gitterbug
    I think this site has helped me deal with stress more than many things I can name. I like the support, kindness, and concern for fellow nurses that is shown here. That being said, I will now go take my meds, hang upside down for 10 minutes, call my kids and complain about something, walk in the yard for 15 minutes, and say some prayers. Blessing to you.
  6. by   BrnEyedGirl
    "One way of relief by nurses after a horrible day is debriefing."


    I soooo agree w/you Anne!!!!! My DH learned long ago,.that when I come home I am wired,.especially after a long,.busy night!! The very first thing I do (as I'm taking off my shoes) is start talking!! It may be about a really emotional moment ( death of a child for instance), it may be about an annoying coworker, or a demanding family member,..but I ramble on and on,..it is so nice to come here and hear how we are really all in the same boat!!! I think as health care workers one of our healthier ways of coping is having what some might view as a very dark, often sarcastic sense of humor. I can get on here and say things I would NEVER ever want a pt or family member to hear!! We so often see things on a daily basis that many people will never in thier lives see or have to deal with,..we see it,.we have to stay professional, clear headed and function through it. This is a great place to vent and release some emotional baggage so we can get up and do it all again! I would never want to offend anyone w/anything said here,.but it does help to recharge,.so if tomorrow night it is you in the ER w/your 3yr old who has a massive head injury I can be there for you,.which BTW is where I want to be!!

    Have a great day everyone!!
  7. by   dekatn
    This site has helped me tremendously, I am the only nurse in my family, I can vent 'til I am blue in the face and nobody really understands where I am coming from. I can come to allnurses and talk with other nurses that can at least relate even if they don't all agree at times. And, you are right, we are reading only one side of the story, but, I know in my situation, it is always my true feelings at the time. Sometimes we do feel "put upon" by everybody even though deep down we know that "everybody" isn't responsible, it still feels good to get those feelings out with others that have probably experienced the same thing at some point in their career. I look forward to the feedback whether it be positive or negative, at least other nurses have an idea, where as my family doesn't have a clue!
  8. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Alpha, it's always welcomed to help each other out with suggestions and resources. However, I think individuals should be left to judge for themselves what best relieves their stress. No one site of place is the "be all, end all" for everyone and no place has "everything we need" to relieve stress. If allnurses.com provides such relief, so much the better. You could say, you yourself are using this site as a tool for people to find stress relief, therefore, this indeed IS a good alternative/place for people to get what they need.

    JMO of course.
  9. by   Alpha13
    Quote from SmilingBluEyes
    If allnurses.com provides such relief, so much the better. You could say, you yourself are using this site as a tool for people to find stress relief, therefore, this indeed IS a good alternative/place for people to get what they need.
    Is this a philosphical debate, lol.

    This site has helped me tremendously, I am the only nurse in my family, I can vent 'til I am blue in the face and nobody really understands where I am coming from. I can come to allnurses and talk with other nurses that can at least relate even if they don't all agree at times.
    Ok I'm not going to say that its always bad to vent here. In some cases it may help. But too many people use it as an excuse to go on about any ridiculous thing, and this cultivates the crappy negative attitudes that are so prevalent here. I know I'm getting a bit esoteric so let me find some examples

    https://allnurses.com/forums/2110338-post1.html
    https://allnurses.com/forums/2110824-post1.html
    https://allnurses.com/forums/2106903-post1.html <this one gets the gold star

    Don't look at the content of those posts so much as the attitude behind them. Those people (along with anyone else who lets themselves get entangled in the mini-melodramas) are slowly but surely damaging their psyche with each post they make. Bitterness does not just spontaneously result with age, it is manifested and spread via negative actions! Next time someone one of your coworkers tries to blindside you with one of her SOB stories tell her "Sorry dear, I'm at the 90 yard line and I'm making a dash for positivity!" Then literally sprint away into another room.
  10. by   SmilingBluEyes
    To each their own; that is the more succinct way I should have put it.

    If this is not one's cup of tea, so be it. We all have our own ways to cope and no need to question them. Philisophical? Hardly, I am too brain-dead for that today.

    Not everyone here is to get "stress relief" alone, but for entertainment---there is plenty of that in mini-melodrama, as you put it. Nothing wrong with that either. I give people more credit and not worrying about psyche-damaging in these threads.

    To each their own.

    PS -----------maybe you are looking at the wrong threads. I see plenty of fun, positive stuff going on here too. And psyches are not gonna be damaged here, unless they are extremely fragile, to begin with! (smile) Have a good day.
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on Mar 14, '07

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