when do i have to tell them i'm prego??

  1. so, i just started working on a telemetry floor as a staff nurse, and i'm still on orientation (and i will be until june or so). right now i am 11 weeks pregnant. when do i have to disclose to my new nurse manager that i am pregnant? i'm not showing, and my scrubs hide it well, but people have commented that i'm "glowing".. and i just tell them that i'm sweaty. i was planning on waiting until around 16 or so weeks (i figure thats when i might be more noticeably pregnant).. but i need this job so badly and i don't want to lose it. i know they can't fire me for being pregnant, but with FL being a right to work state, you never know what kind of crap excuse they could pull out. i don't want to put myself or my baby in danger, i've been very careful so far and i always ask for help pulling patients up and turning them, and we have no airborne/droplet isolation rooms on our floor. legally, does anyone know when i have to tell them?

    thanks in advance.
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    About flightnurse2b

    Joined: Jul '07; Posts: 2,287; Likes: 4,696
    Paramedic/LPN; from US
    Specialty: EMS, ER, GI, PCU/Telemetry

    9 Comments

  3. by   BEDPAN76
    Hi flightnurse2be, Congratulations! Is it your first? I'm not in FL but I would advise you to keep it to yourself as long as you can. Like you said, they may find (or create ) crapola to run you out. Sad but true. By the way, don't you have a kitty who had a scratching issue? How did that turn out?
  4. by   flightnurse2b
    Quote from BEDPAN76
    Hi flightnurse2be, Congratulations! Is it your first? I'm not in FL but I would advise you to keep it to yourself as long as you can. Like you said, they may find (or create ) crapola to run you out. Sad but true. By the way, don't you have a kitty who had a scratching issue? How did that turn out?
    yes it is our first and we are scared to death. i'm going to try and keep it to myself as long as i can, i just don't want to be denied maternity leave or something because i did. the labor laws in this state are confusing. and to make matters worse, dad works on the floor too. i told him i reallllllly want him to go somewhere else when his contract is up (he travels, i don't). my boss knew that we were a couple when she hired us and said she didn't care since we weren't married, but i dont want anyone crying nepotism.

    kitty is doing well. we did end up having declaw her at the request of our landlord anyway, who said we could not keep her if she was not declawed. we only did the front paws and she is doing well, she's her old rambunctious little self. thanks for checking on her
  5. by   RNDreams
    congratulations on your pregnancy, i feel for you having worked for your position and now you are scared when you deserve to be elated. i think (i am not a nurse but i was a spa manager in the exact same situation and was told by another manager of the company that i confided in not to tell he because "the owner hates kids she well over 50 never had any of her one, and all of the pregnant employees disappear" so i (being 6 foot tall) never showed until my 9th month but i told her at 16 weeks because i think that is a good time to announce because most people are technically out of the woods for problems so a lot of people wait until then. i did and i caught myself lying to this woman (which i never do that i have had trouble with pregnancies sticking and didn't want to make the announcement until i knew i was out of the woods. when it was in actuality my first (dream) spa management job at the time and my first try at having a baby and it happened on the first try. the spa owner smiled (or tried to as her lips curled up) and even said to me ;i thought in your interview that you said kids weren't in the picture for you anytime soon." well i had actually interviewed with her almost a year before i finally got a random call about the management position for twice the wok and half the pay the previous spa director was making, red flag i know bvut she is known in our area as a skin care goddess and myself being an esthetician i had dreamed of working for her for 3 years after becoming licensed.

    well i worked 12 hour days during my leave, got numerous emails from her about how i had "turned the place around" "everyone was much happier under my management etc..." her fianc came by the spa quite a bit while i was pregnant and was the maintenance man, he was our buddy would fix the printer, touch up paint as necessary. i went on my maternity leave with a 5k bonus from the owner for the good work i had done which was wonderful, of course.

    however. while i was out i got numerous calls from my employees stating that her fianc now was on the payroll and they had thought he was telling her things to get me fired and he literally had my job. i told them not to worry about me they were over reacting and when i got back i would take back control (only 6 little weeks later) and everything would be fine.

    well i got an email from the fianc that we would be open the day after christmas, i offered to come in since i so wanted to be back at work and missed my team of staff so much i went in, worked myself to death that entire day because there was a lot of catching up i needed to do. at the end of the day i got called into the office with the owner and the fianc and he terminated me. he said he was now the director of operations, i asked the owner "for future reference can you please tell me what specifically did wrong so that for my future career i wouldn't repeat it" she just shook her head (brainwashed) and he spoke up and said we have a letter for you and its all in there. i got out to my car crying (the bread winner of the family with a 6 week old baby at home) and read the letter that stated georgia is a right to work state and your services are no longer needed. nothing more nothing less.

    the d-bad (sorry) even tried to deny my unemployment (which i was granted)

    so there is my reason why you should wait and the rest i guess i needed to get out, sorry.
    christine
  6. by   ~Mi Vida Loca~RN
    I didn't know you were pregnant, Congratulations. I don't work in Nursing yet so I don't know the rule there, but I never knew you HAD to tell them you were pregnant, in any time frame. I mean obviously at some point you want to just in case something happens, and when you are close to being due but I would wait until after orientation is done and your job is perm.

    When I moved here I started a job and I was just barely pregnant. I didn't tell them at the interview and I was worried about telling them. When I started working I saw like 40% of the woman were pregnant and wasn't worried anymore
    Last edit by ~Mi Vida Loca~RN on Apr 16, '09
  7. by   Magsulfate
    Yeah, I think you should wait until it is obvious. Sometimes you can be 4 to 5 months along before you start showing. In scrubs it may be even longer. As long as you tell them a month or two before you have the baby, that is all they need to know.

    Florida is a right to work state, but they also have to follow the law of FMLA. As long as you are doing your job well, they shouldn't have a reason to fire you.

    One thing you might want to consider is, were you pregnant before you got on their iinsurance? If so, be very careful, they may try to treat it as a pre existing condition. You can try to say you found out you were pregnant AFTER the insurance kicked in.. or something like that.

    It all comes down to your job performance. If you are a good nurse, they will deal with your maternity leave, and be glad when you come back. If they find reason to not like you, they may make work a living hell for you.

    Congratulations on the first baby! You should be so happy! Stop worrying! This is a wonderful time!
  8. by   flightnurse2b
    Quote from Magsulfate
    One thing you might want to consider is, were you pregnant before you got on their iinsurance? If so, be very careful, they may try to treat it as a pre existing condition. You can try to say you found out you were pregnant AFTER the insurance kicked in.. or something like that.

    !

    ah, my other dilemma.
    i am paying out the yin yang for COBRA right now. when i left my job in NC, my employer told me i could get COBRA but that the network only extends to georgia so it would be fruitless because i'd always be out of network. after getting the run around from BCBS (they wanted over $1000 for two months of out of pocket coverage) and being denied by every other individual plan, i learned this... as long as i do not have a lapse in coverage for greater than or equal to 60 days (which i won't, because i pay $535 a month for COBRA continuation), and i will pay until my 90 days is almost up, then i will have had continuous coverage on a pre-existing condition and will be eligible to jump from one group plan to another.

    gotta love the american health care system. makes me wanna spit nails.

    thanks for all the words of encouragement!!!
  9. by   Jolie
    Legally, you don't ever have to tell anyone anything.

    As a practical matter, you will need to arrange time off, so keep in mind the amount of time your manager will need (in advance) to cover your schedule for the number of weeks you plan to take.

    As for FMLA, it is unlikely that you will qualify, since you will not have a year of seniority with this employer prior to your baby's birth. If that's the case, you will need to know the facility's policy on maternity and/or sick leave. Perhaps you can research that on your employer's intranet or via your Human Resources P&P manual so you have an idea the amount of time a job may be held and any requirements or responsibilities on your part.

    If your employer agrees to extend FMLA to you (despite your lack of 1 year of service), it would be a good idea to request both a copy of the facility's FMLA P&P as well as an appointment with your manager and/or a HR specialist. There are many responsibilities of an employee using FMLA that you need to be aware of, such as filing of forms at certain times, obtaining statements from your healthcare provider at certain times, notification of your intent to return to work within a certain timeframe and payment of benefit premiums to insure continued coverage during leave. Many employees don't understand that these requirements exist, and that can add a lot of stress during a leave, something no new parent needs.

    Best to you!
  10. by   DeadHead219
    I just wanted to say CONGRATS on your pregnancy!! How very exciting. Since I am not familiar with FL laws, I just want to wish you the best with the work situation!!
  11. by   Neveranurseagain
    Congrats to you!!! And remember that you should not be scooping the kitty litter box while pregnant...and I pay $1000 a month for COBRA for me and my 2 teens...$64,000 in the past 4 1/2 years with copays and deductibles...

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