To Quit or Not to Quit

SouthTXRN · Mar 12, 2009

Anything new can be pretty scary. Take things one day at a time and see how you feel. It's pretty routine for you to have to know all your meds, labs, x-rays, health history, nursing dx's and such but not from the top of your head. Carry your cheat sheets. Things will get easier with time, we all have to go through this but it's definitely worth it when it's over. Don't give up so soon you'll soon get the hang of it.

Is there anything in particular that makes you nervous in clinicals or when you give meds, tx, etc? I'm also surprised you get a daily grade, we would get a grade at the end of the semester and it was pass/fail (and it was virtually impossible to fail).

Keep us posted on how things go with you.

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Mar 12, 2009

There are a lot of different areas in which a nurse can work.

I would love emergency, but many people would hate that. I know nurses who adore a doctor's office (which you would probably like) but you'd have to shoot me from boredom.

Don't make a decision now. Finish out the term with good grades, think about it over the summer, and if you decide not to continue in fall, go for it. But keep your options open.

Nursing is terrifying at first. You aren't alone. I remember passing the boards nad being left alone as charge in an LTC the day I got my license. I trembled.

:)

Mark Perry · Mar 12, 2009

Take it One Day At A Time

feisty · Mar 12, 2009

I remember feeling overwhelmed when presented with a new skill to perform in clinicals. The meds and diagnosis aspect varies and will sometimes be short and sweet and at other times never ending. I kept a folder with my past work in it and would use it if there was any material that could be copied, such as drug info.. The material was already arranged in the format needed and concise.

I remember one of my first med-surg clinicals....my patient was "a train wreck" as described by my instructor. She wasn't in a train wreck, but her health was horrible. The day I received her the family decided to make her a DNR, stop tube feedings, etc. But all this transpired after I had fought with the pumps, vomiting, diarrhea, contractures, contact precautions, bleeding, bruising with the slightest touch, and constant pain. I had just read about DIC and guess what was running through my mind the entire day :) I stayed 1 1/2 hours longer than the other students because it took that long to finish all my paperwork. I left feeling like there was no way I could do this. I posted that just to say that it happens to others. Many students never admit it, but it happens.

When I was in school we were assigned an advisor which was one of the nursing instructors. I know some are approachable and some aren't, but find one to discuss this with. This is something they can help you with because they have seen this before. You are not the first student to feel this way. Don't make a decision without talking to someone. You also seem like a compassionate person from what you wrote in your post. Talking to someone will help you work through your feelings and doubts.

Please remember that med surg is only one area of nursing. There are so many options in this profession. The qualities you listed when describing yourself are good to have as a nurse.

Have you considered seeing your physician? We often forget to take care of ourselves because we are so busy taking care of others.

marie-francoise · Mar 12, 2009

Yup! I've hated clinicals from day one - especially the med-surg clinicals. I'm soon to graduate, and my hatred for them has increased further, esp. now that we're doing 12-hour clinicals. I've felt like quitting during every clinical, but I've come too far in school.

Had I known how much I hated the hospital and hated clinicals, I would never have enrolled in nursing school. That's my honest answer.

P.S. My clinical mates also despise clinical. Believe me, your reaction to clinical is a normal one. (I would say the only rational one, ha!)

Mollypita · Mar 12, 2009

If you're in an ADN program, I would definitely stick it out. Please remember, clinicals are so far removed from what it's like to actually be a nurse. If you worked there, you would know where stuff was, you would be more familiar with the sort of patients there, and you could easily look up a drug without someone breathing down your neck. Not to suggest it's an easy job, but things do come together. As another poster said, you seem to have many of the qualities that will make you a good nurse. Hopefully you'll hang in there, unless you decide it's truly not for you- but it's difficult to determine that just from clinicals alone. And believe me, you're not the only one who may have had a too-harsh clinical instructor!

bld24 · Mar 12, 2009

Two years ago I could have written your post. Clinicals made me feel incompetent and stupid and I'm far from that. Clinicals were the bane of my existence. I dreaded going to almost every single one. Every day I would say to myself, "just get through this day" They never really got any better. I just learned everything I could while I was on the floor and book wise I tried hard to master all of the theory. And as hard as it was I took advantage of every learning opportunity on the floor. It was hard, there were nurses who were so busy that it seemed like you were just a huge burden to them-I understand now why it's like that-they are swamped and it's hard to teach like that. I stuck a smile on my face and tried my best to be prepared.

What I know now is that the 25 meds are generally never all given and if you have a question there are at least 5 drug books in the med room, so you can look it up. The 20 diagnoses -usually a patients history, but you have to find the root cause of why your patient has come to the hospital this time. An appendectomy 20 years ago most likely doesn't have any bearing on a patient with acute onset of abdominal pain. You're clinical instructor may have you researching all history, but the goal is to start to put the pieces together. The critical thinking part of nursing.

Another problem I had with clinicals, is that no one ever explained to me very simple terms of nursing. I spent more time in the beginning trying to figure out things like the MAR-what is it? How is it used? No one ever sat us down and said here is how a nursing shift goes and here is what you need to do. They focused so much more on the 25 meds and the 20 diagnoses and probably rightly so, the other stuff falls into line and will vary depending on where you work.

I don't know if nursing school gets easier, but I can tell you my clinicals never did. Up until my very last one, I never really had a confident feeling-I always felt incompetent and questioned my decision to be a nurse. I still have an occasional moment like that, but it's way different now. I've been on my own as an RN for about 2 months now, on a Med Surg unit, and I can tell you it's nothing like nursing school clinicals. That sick dreaded feeling of walking down the hall at 0630 wanting to run right back out the door goes away. For me it really was just "gutting it out" and feigning some amount of confidence.

I personally think you're probably doing great-I wanted to quit after my first week at the nursing home. Another thing that got me through clincials was having a good buddy. A lot of people in nursing school pretend that everything is just great and they love every single second on the floor. While I'm sure that's possible, it's really unlikely-Share your misery with someone-do some venting. So many people try to pretend that it's all good. When I had just had enough, and decided to share the fact that I was struggling with my clinical group, I think people were shocked because they thought I had it all together. It allowed people to open up and say "hey I'm struggling too". Misery does love company and it's ok to share that you're feeling like this with your group.

I wish you the best of luck and in 2 years I'd like to see you posting to someone who just started nursing school, because they will write the same post. Clinicals were difficult for me and most of the time unpleasant, but in the end I have a great job and I'm really proud to be a nurse.

marie-francoise · Mar 12, 2009

Another problem I had with clinicals, is that no one ever explained to me very simple terms of nursing. I spent more time in the beginning trying to figure out things like the MAR-what is it? How is it used? No one ever sat us down and said here is how a nursing shift goes and here is what you need to do. They focused so much more on the 25 meds and the 20 diagnoses and probably rightly so, the other stuff falls into line and will vary depending on where you work.

This is so TRUE! I mean, can't they tell us how a shift goes? - the sequence of report, assessments, etc.; and how to look at the wall board, when the physicians visit, how and when to check the physician orders, what a MAR is, how a chart is laid out versus what's in the computer, etc. That really doesn't get driven home in nursing school.

Purple_Scrubs, BSN, RN · Mar 12, 2009

OK, I might get flamed big time for this. I am not going to give you any advice, I am only going to tell who what I wish I had done.

I felt the same way about clinicals as you do. I never really enjoyed it, but I was really good at it. I always got great feedback on my paperwork and patient care from my instructors and the staff nurses, without exception. I did very well in lectures also. I ended up with only 3 Bs and the rest As in nursing school. Somehow I always had the feeling that I had them all fooled. I was putting on a happy face and "pretending" to love what I was doing because I did not want to be a "quitter". I kept thinking maybe it would get better when I was in the real world.

Once I was in the real world, I found it even worse than clinicals. Of course, I did have a poor orientation and there were staffing issues, but I left the hospital after only 4 months. I was fortunate to find a job in school nursing, and I often say that I love my job, but if I am being 100% honest, I am only doing it because I have to. When my student loan is paid off and some other bills are paid, I will probably leave nursing for good. My former classmates, co-workers, family and friends would be shocked to hear this from me.

Nursing is hard physicially, emotionally, and mentally. It is not for everyone. Even if someone is good at it (I have never had anything but a glowing review review as a nurse or while still in school), it does not mean they are cut out for it. Nursing has been a blessing to me in many ways: I feel proud of what I have accomplished, I have gained confidence in my abilities and intellect, and have taken steps to fix some things that were wrong in my life in order to be healthier. But when it comes down to it, I just do not enjoy being a nurse. It is a paycheck. There are many, many days when I wish I would have recognized this while still in school and gotten out with a little less of the $35,000 of debt that I now have. On the other hand, if I had done that, who knows where I would be now, so hindsight is 20/20.

Sorry if this only adds to your confusion. I just thought you should see both sides of the story.

gonzo1, ASN, RN · Mar 12, 2009

In school I was considered book smart and did well on tests. In clinicals I was considered slow and dumb and needed a lot of hand holding. Had some teachers that reallly wanted me to quit.

I stuck it out. Now I am a travel nurse and do a good job in all respects. If you stick it out you will have a great career to at least fall back on and you won't be kicking yourself in the hiney ten years from now for giving up too soon.

marie-francoise · Mar 12, 2009

OK, I might get flamed big time for this. I am not going to give you any advice, I am only going to tell who what I wish I had done.
I felt the same way about clinicals as you do. I never really enjoyed it, but I was really good at it. I always got great feedback on my paperwork and patient care from my instructors and the staff nurses, without exception. I did very well in lectures also. I ended up with only 3 Bs and the rest As in nursing school. Somehow I always had the feeling that I had them all fooled. I was putting on a happy face and "pretending" to love what I was doing because I did not want to be a "quitter". I kept thinking maybe it would get better when I was in the real world.
Once I was in the real world, I found it even worse than clinicals. Of course, I did have a poor orientation and there were staffing issues, but I left the hospital after only 4 months. I was fortunate to find a job in school nursing, and I often say that I love my job, but if I am being 100% honest, I am only doing it because I have to. When my student loan is paid off and some other bills are paid, I will probably leave nursing for good. My former classmates, co-workers, family and friends would be shocked to hear this from me.
Nursing is hard physicially, emotionally, and mentally. It is not for everyone. Even if someone is good at it (I have never had anything but a glowing review review as a nurse or while still in school), it does not mean they are cut out for it. Nursing has been a blessing to me in many ways: I feel proud of what I have accomplished, I have gained confidence in my abilities and intellect, and have taken steps to fix some things that were wrong in my life in order to be healthier. But when it comes down to it, I just do not enjoy being a nurse. It is a paycheck. There are many, many days when I wish I would have recognized this while still in school and gotten out with a little less of the $35,000 of debt that I now have. On the other hand, if I had done that, who knows where I would be now, so hindsight is 20/20.
Sorry if this only adds to your confusion. I just thought you should see both sides of the story.

I won't flame you - I agree with you. You're being honest. I can see how real-world nursing can be much worse than clinicals - you have a real patient load, and all the responsibilities and impossibilities that come with it. And you do three 12-hour shifts in a row. Not my definition of quality of life. If others love being a nurse, more power to them. We need ya. But I can't see myself enjoying bedside nursing. Maybe it does take a type of person. I don't know. There's a reason for the shortage; at least in good economic times...