Question for you Seniors? Please

  1. Hello again ya'll,
    I haven't posted in awhile because Iv'e been really busy studying! But when I did post you guy's were great with your responses. Anyway's i'm just a little curious about something. Have any of you had to care for a patient you just can't stand to be in the room with. My point ...... a child molester! I understand that when I do become a nurse I will take an oath to treat and help everyone with compasion and do my best job as a nurse. But just how do you syc. yourself out to stand along side of an adult that has been convicted and proven to have hurt or raped a 5 year old child? My instructor say's you just HAVE to do it. Any advice would be great.
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    About Freebird55

    Joined: Jun '02; Posts: 45
    Wife;mother;full time student


  3. by   Jay Levan
    My answer is simple, short, and sweet. It is NOT my job to Judge the person, no matter what they have done. My preference is not to know the details, however even if they should be thrust upon me, I have learned to go about my tasks, in rendering nursing care to a patient, with a detachment, and many times, I have found myself in sympathy, of the horrible plight that awaits such a horrible person, if they do not repent of their sin.
  4. by   NurseDennie
    I didn't take any oath. Just a point, because I've taken care of people that I intensely disliked. Most of the time, the offputting nature of their personality was d/t some psych problem. Doesn't make it any easier.

    I can think that I'd take care of a child molester, but I don't know. I really don't know. Luckily I'm in research now. I wouldn't enroll him/her into my study!


  5. by   LasVegasRN
    I was assigned to one during our psych rotation. He would go to different churches and "volunteer" to work in their daycare. I asked him why he did this. He said he felt it was his obligation and duty to "inform" these 5 and 6 year old boys about their body and sexuality. To make these little boys "comfortable" about becoming gay because it was "natural" and he wanted to "show" them how to perform sexually before 'other people' brainwashed them into thinking they were wrong for loving their bodies and other men.
    Now keep in mind that this was the south, and the early 80's. I came out of that experience thinking that homosexuality and being a pedophile were one and the same. It wasn't until years later after having met and worked with other homosexuals that I realized this guy was NOT the norm and did NOT represent the entire population. Thank goodness, because I would not have wanted to go through life being so ignorant and judgemental.
    The last I heard about this particular patient was that he was incarcerated after having repeated the offense after being discharged.
  6. by   Harleyhead
    I agree with jay Levan I have given nursing care to many people and that was it no judgement.
  7. by   Dr. Kate
    First, Dennie is right, you don't take an oath to take care of everybody. But you are charged with rendering consistent, competent, comparable care to all patients.
    I have found that while I make a lot of judgements when I am outside of the room, when I get in with the patient they become just another person who needs my help at this time. It has taken time to get to this point. It comes down to being polite, professional, and remembering this is not about me.
  8. by   Freebird55
    Thanks ya'll. I just wanted some insight. I guess if I ever find myself in this situation, I just need to remember that I'm a nurse and i'm treating not only just "this" person but also a condition, and make it a learning experience. God Bless all!
  9. by   rbez

    For heaven's sake, don't condemn yourself for being repulsed by a patient. We've all been there. It is self-destructive to believe that you have to 'care about' (emotionally) every patient or you're not a good nurse. There will be plenty more situations like this in the future.

    One thing that helps -- whenever you're totally 'yukked out' by a patient, take some time to reflect on it to uncover exactly why you feel that way. In this case, it is obvious -- but sometimes it's not. Frequently, it's because the patient's behavior and/or value system conflicts with yours. If you can dissect it and understand it, you will probably become more objective and find it easier to cope.

    I have a bud in corrective nursing (triple ick) who loves her work . She tells me "I hate the behavior, not the person". But she has problems dealing with COPD patients because they remind her of a relative she detested!
  10. by   mattsmom81
    Some patients we feel warm and friendly towards. Some we don't. It's OK to feel either way.

    The link here is the basic nursing care we provide to everyone...we don't have to like them or approve of their lifestyle or their crimes to deliver basic, humane care.
  11. by   Freebird55
    Thanks to all !
    I'm so glad to know that all of you will be here for me, while I'm in school to answer my questions, give me advice and just be there!I do believe in my heart I will be a good nurse, this is my dream, but just knowing all of you are out there makes it so much better. God Bless you all, everyone of you are special. I hope then when I do make it, I will have a little bit of all of you with me!Freebird
  12. by   live4today
    I have taken care of child molesters, rapists, murderers, adulterers, liars, thieves, and other criminals in my time, and the only way I got through it was to keep in mind that I was the nurse for that patient.....there as a PART OF the whole healthcare team involved in treating patients like that. Having come from an abusive background, it wasn't easy which is why I always prayed silently for those criminals, and asked God to do what I couldn't humanly do.....and HE HE always does. :kiss
  13. by   Nurse Ratched
    I took care of a pt who had molested his own child and made efforts to explain to me how she had "invited" his advances (child was less than 10 years old.) As he was on a psych floor, and his admission was related to this whole issue, I told him (very calmly and professionally despite my inner willies) that his first task was to accept total responsibility for his own actions, rather than blaming a child, and I that I could not help him further (from a counseling standpoint) until he came to that understanding, difficult though it would be for him to acknowledge. That was the most difficult patient interaction I have ever had.

    I don't know to this day whether that was an "appropriate" response, as I didn't have time to really think about it beforehand - I was simply blown away by someone trying to justify that behavior. But I don't believe I was judgemental and it didn't affect my nursing care of him. It can be very difficult, but you may be in a position to have something resembling a therapeutic interaction with such a patient, depending on the situation.
  14. by   mattsmom81
    I think you made a good response. If children 'invite' sexual advances from adults they have been 'taught' to behave provocatively, by the molester.....