I'm really stressing!

  1. My husband and I are both LPN's. Okay, so some of you know him as the outspoken person that he is.
    I'm stressin' because we are BOTH in school, BOTH work at the same hospital, same shift, same nights........get the picture?
    I'm stressed because I need some ME time. We are fairly newlyweds, not quite two years, and still feeling things out.
    We are not youngin's, we are both well into our 30's and should be over alot of this.
    I don't want to hurt his feelings, I just need a few, non-stress, no-husband, no-"I want something" days.

    Is this to much to ask?
  2. Visit NurseDianne profile page

    About NurseDianne, ADN

    Joined: Aug '02; Posts: 527; Likes: 58
    Hospice Nurse; from US
    Specialty: Hospice, PEDS, MS, Surgical


  3. by   Youda
    Dianne, I think you already know the answers to your own questions! You know already what you need, some "me" time. Your marriage will be stronger when you take care of yourself. If his feelings get hurt, he'll get over it. And, who knows, he might need a little time away, too! What did Kahill Gabran say? You should be close, but not too close, like the pillars of the temple stand not in each other's shadow. Beautiful advice about marriage. But, what do I know?
  4. by   KC CHICK
    My best friend and her husband went through our nursing program together. They also had an 8 year old daughter to take care of at the time. I don't know how they did it. The two of them graduated at the same time.

    There are some advantages though. My hubby didn't have a clue what I was going through....yours does. He has walked in your shoes and can completely understand your frustrations.

    Take a night to go out w/the girls....JUST THE GIRLS! You definately do need some "you" time. My friend really needed those nights we went out w/out the guys. Just to get out for a few hours over some margaritas to relax.

    You'll get through this,
  5. by   nimbex
    I think EVERY nurse needs a hobby or activity with a NON NURSING buddy. Yep... where do ya find the time with work, school, studying, the house and each other?

    Girl, you've got to prioritize it and make it happen, even if it's a 15 minute walk alone 3 times a week.

    You have to love you first and take care of you to be a happy wife and happy nurse.

    I needed ME time too, bought a keyboard and picked up the piano again, haven't played in 15 plus years.

    Doesn't matter if it's underwater basket weaving!!!! And doesn't mean you don't love the husband....

    PS. Hubby and I just started ballroom dance lessons together today to have some US time, away from kids, house and jobs....

    Take care of you... and wishing you well
  6. by   BadBird
    Sounds like you desperately need a girls night out! Get together with some friends for a margarita or two and let loose. Have fun!
    My hubby has his pool league night and I have my luncheons with my friends, that way we have some interesting stories to share that are not work related. I actually miss him when he isn't with me and it is a good feeling after 6 years that I look forward to telling him about my day. I do wish however that he knew more about what I do, when I try to tell him about my shift it grosses him out sometimes. LOL
    I absolutely could not stand to be around my husband that much! It's nothing against him, I love him dearly. But I like him because I don't have to spend every waking moment with him.

    You both should start setting yourself up for different classes, shifts, work nights, etc.

    I just cherish my alone time. I do believe you'll go insane without it. The girls night out thing is important, but you need to get away from him a little more during the day too.

    Tell Gary I said so.

  8. by   Love-A-Nurse
    if i may, he may be feeling the same way and don't know how to tell you either. a conversation with him would probably "ironed" out the "problem".

    i do admire you diane. working two jobs, going to school full time and a newly wed, you go girl!

    how long before you both finish? how special or so i think, for a couple to do this together.

    all the best to each of you and to the unity of your marriage.
  9. by   kids
    I sure to feel for you.

    I love my husband dearly and he is my favorite person to be around but I sure couldn't deal with him 24/7...as it is we have the same days off and to tell ya the truth...I get kinda tired of spending every waking non-working moment with him. Actually I never get a second of time alone.

    My office is 5 minutes from home. I have never been one to take an hour lunch until this week: I have discovered the luxury of coming home for lunch to an empty house...no husband, no kids...I don't even answer the phone. I eat my lunch, read my book in absolute solitude. Heaven!
  10. by   ?burntout
    Tell him you need some alone time and THEN you may give him a big treat :kiss !!! (Sorry-mind in the gutter-just a tad!)


    If you have a lock on the bathroom door-USE IT! Take a long bubble bath-my hubby knows know that if I'm in a bubble bath and he comes through that door-I better see blood!:chuckle


    Tell him: "Honey if I don't get some alone time for a little while-I will explode and it won't be pretty!" My hubby can take a hint (an the occasional joke)!

    sorry....been a LONG day
  11. by   deespoohbear
    Like the other posters here, I also love my husband dearly but to spend every waking moment with him would not be a good thing for our relationship. I need to have my "me" time. Especially after I work a 12 hour shift. By the time I get home, I am so tired of dealing with people and the telephone I just tune everything out. Of course, that is after I visit with the boys for awhile and my hubby. You definitely need to get away even for a day with the girls or just by yourself. You will go insane otherwise.