Did anyone tell you, you couldn't do it?

Nurses General Nursing

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I want to be a nurse and one day I hope I will be. But sometimes it can be so discouraging when you have people telling you, you can't do it. They say you're dumb, unfocused and just doesn't have what it takes to be a nurse. I just don't get how cruel people can be sometimes. :( So I was wondering if any of you had people put you down and and discourage you from doing something?

Specializes in Med/Surg, LTACH, LTC, Home Health.
Yes, my husband. Although he has since denied ever saying that, lol. It kept me going through the toughest parts of my training though as I was determined to prove him wrong.

My husband divorced me so that he wouldn't have to LOOK AT the ' I told you so' everyday for the rest of his miserable life! I'm single now, an RN (soon to be BSN), I drive a convertible 6-speed 2-seater which PROUDLY displays my last name and title on the front, kids are grown, and life is wonderful! The last time I checked, the ex has had 2 knee replacements, 3 abdominal hernias removed, pulmonary embolism, and being forced to retire on disability and remain on light activity indefinitely due to recurrent clots....all at what's supposed to be his prime young age of 47! I never wished any harm to him. I'm just saying that there is such a thing as the wrath of God! Little ole me never HAD to lay a hand on him. He got his just-due and so did I. The only difference is, I have no regrets in how I treated him!

Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

In early 2005 I was enrolled in an LVN program when a clinical instructor snapped at me and said, "Maybe this isn't the career for you!" He also said other things such as, "It's only going to get harder."

I completed this program in late 2005 and the same instructor made peace with me in his own way while evaluating me during one of my last clinical rotations with him. He said, "You usually get started on your own while the other students lolly-gag." He also added that 85 percent of students pass NCLEX on the first attempt and he was sure I'd be one of them.

Eight years has elapsed since his first 'unsupportive' comments. I've been an LVN and now I am an RN. When people doubt my abilities I enjoy proving them wrong.

I have had family memebers tell me that I couldn't be a nurse. Not because of my grades, but because they think I can't handle or "stomach" the job. One family member tried her best to get me to switch to another major, but I really want to be a nurse. After I finished my pre-reqs and co-reqs in the Spring of 2012, I wasn't able to apply to the nursing program. I had to wait until the next application enrollment date (I can only apply once a year), because I didn't get my 3rd Hep. B immunization in time for clinicals. Another family member told my mom, "Oh, she will not finish and apply. She doesn't finish anything." Grrrrr...That made me so mad and I am going to prove her wrong! I didn't bust my butt, get a 4.0 GPA, and come this far for nothing! :)

Specializes in Critical Care, Education.

PP's have provided numerous stories of how they overcome odds to realize their dreams.... BUT, as we all know, results may vary.

I always urge caution to anyone who has tried repeatedly and unsuccessfully to achieve a goal. If the failure is due to lack of effort, motivation, funding, or other factor that can be overcome with additional resources, hard work or initiative... go for it. BUT, if the lack of success is due to a fundamental mis-match, then it is a complete waste of time to invest more time and effort.

For instance, some people have cognitive issues that do not affect overall intelligence but would prohibit a career in nursing. One of my children is moderately learning disabled... cannot deal with any type of abstract math. She was not capable of meeting the learning and performance requirements of a career in math or science. But she has achieved a graduate degree (MFA) and considerable success in her career. Likewise, my DH (red-green color blindness) would not have been able to achieve any goal in which the ability to distinguish color was important.

This forum is a great source of "everyone can do it!" and unconditional support.... but let's exercise some critical thinking. Some people just do not have the inherent ability to become a nurse. It may be much healthier to advise them to first seek appropriate assistance to analyze/diagnose the reasons for their lack of success rather than jumping on the "try and try again" bandwagon.

Five cases.

First: My mother was told that she'd never be an RN by her nursing instructor. By the time she graduated and passed her NCLEX and received her license, sadly the instructor passed away. She wanted to show her her license. My mother has an MSN and is considering furthering her education.

Second: 11th grade, after changing majors from veterinarian to culinary artist to forensic scientist to nursing it was time to meet with the guidance counselor. I sat with him and he asked me what I wanted to be. I said "a nurse" with a smile. He then proceeded to say, "You should choose a more realistic career."

Third: 12th grade, had a teacher who went around the classroom asking us what we wanted to be. When I said "nursing" in front of the class, he proceeded quite loudly to say "you're not even fit enough to pick up the garbage off my floor." I cried at home that day but decided to prove him wrong.

Fourth: Went to LPN school. Had to take A&P in my college while in the program. Was told I wouldn't graduate. Taking classes and clinicals will burn you out.

Passed A&P 1&2 including labs with As and Bs.

Graduated.

Passed NCLEX and am a nurse.

Fifth: January 2013, getting ready to apply to the LPN-RN transition program. Guidance counselor tells me "You won't get into the transition program. Guaranteed. " "You need to retake humanities courses in the summer." I told her "No. I'm applying to nursing for summer of 2013." She tells me again In front of my father "You won't get in."

Fast forward to March. I got accepted to generic AND the transition program. I start the transition program May 13, 2013. God is good.

Specializes in Hospital Education Coordinator.

the problem is not that people are saying negative things, but that you are accepting what they say as fact. SHOW THEM!!!

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
the problem is not that people are saying negative things but that you are accepting what they say as fact. SHOW THEM!!![/quote']

^Second THIS.

Specializes in being a Credible Source.

When I first started college a long time ago, the person telling me that I couldn't was myself. I bought into my own negative self-talk and nearly flunked out before I decided to apply myself to my studies and discovered that, not only could I do it, I could do it at a very high level.

When I was working on my bachelors degree in biology, I had to take a standardized test called the clast. It was pretty similar to SATs, but I suck in math so I failed this test twice ( I didn't study at all for it though) so a hold was put on my account and I had to get biology department heads to sign a form to override the hold and allow me to register. One of the heads asked me what I was going to school for, and I told him I was thinking about applying to PA school. He told me I couldn't do it, how could I if I can't even pass the math portion of the clast? He acted like he was going to refuse to sign the form, but then he finally did. I registered for my classes, signed up for the clast again, studied this time, and easily passed it. I eventually graduated with my BS in biology, worked in a lab for a few years, applied to one nursing school, got accepted first try...and I start school this August! I will never forget that horrid man. Instead of encouraging me, he tried to discourage me from trying because I "wasn't smart enough." Never let anyone try to tell you that you can't succeed. If you want it bad enough, and you work hard, you will succeed!

Yes! Long story, CCU RN 8 yrs, home wih 3 babies,.stay home mom for 20 yrs. kept license active by volunteer work.

Widowed, took difficult refresher Course,they wanted to make me fail, but I didn't let them win. Got a great job in Obs. Unit of busy ER..again, peers wanted to see me fail. Meds had changed, computers, BUT the human body has not changed. I worked so hard , home to cry at night, but I stuck it out. I needed the job and I needed to prove to myself and them I could still be an excellent nurse. I won! ANd stayed for 5 years, loved that job! And proud of myself!

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
Yes! Long story, CCU RN 8 yrs, home wih 3 babies,.stay home mom for 20 yrs. kept license active by volunteer work.

Widowed, took difficult refresher Course,they wanted to make me fail, but I didn't let them win. Got a great job in Obs. Unit of busy ER..again, peers wanted to see me fail. Meds had changed, computers, BUT the human body has not changed. I worked so hard , home to cry at night, but I stuck it out. I needed the job and I needed to prove to myself and them I could still be an excellent nurse. I won! ANd stayed for 5 years, loved that job! And proud of myself!

^THAT is AWESOME!!!!

Specializes in CCU,ICU,ER retired.

My mother told me all thru LPN school I was too stupid. Then told me all thru LPN-RN I was too stupid then sat and watched CCU monitors with me one night and told me again I was too stupid to know what I was doing and did my employer know how stupid I was. She told me up until the day she died I was stupid and would always be stupid. I never understood why. But I NEVER EVER told my children even the one that was medically and mentally handicapped they were stupid.

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