Funniest thing a new nurse said/charted/asked...

Nurses Humor

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Recently, while orienting a new nurse to the floor, I was reviewing her charting. She charted scrotal edema as..." Scrotal edema the size of a large baking potatoe". I couldn't help but laugh :rotfl:

Anyone else care to share their story?

Specializes in geriatrics & pediatrics.

" I'm sorry, Mr. Jones, but your HMO doesn't pay for enemas. So I'm going to have to slap the s--- out of you. "

Specializes in geriatrics & pediatrics.
Specializes in Alittle of everything but mostly ER.

While at triage one morning, two women walked into the ER. The younger of the two approached me and said "Hi, I'm here to bring in my mother for an autopsy?". I looked at her and the older woman behind her and said "And she would be your mother?" She said "yes". I said "Do you have something with the procedure written down on it?" She handed me a paper that said her mother was due for a breast biopsy at the surgical day. I said "surgical day for a BIOPSY?" She said "Oh did I say autopsy?" We all laughed.

Specializes in Emergency Nursing.
I had just finished walking a nursing student thru her first foley cath when she looked up with pride in her voice and announced that it was the first one she had seen that wasn't hard.

:lol2::lol2::lol2:

I just spit my tea on my monitor. That one takes the cake!!!!!!

Specializes in none yet!!.

Ok...I work on the Post Cardiac Cath Unit. A pt had just come back from having and AICD placed. The area was swollen and was draining pus. The nurse charted... (NO LIE!!!) ... "area red, swollen, and *****." ROFL I couldn't help but chuckle..sure she didn't mean it the way it red but I still can't look at her the same way....

yes very funney

We need more of these stories! I am going to start as a new nurse verrry soon, and i just know that i will make some of these hilarious mistakes.

Specializes in med/surg.
We need more of these stories! I am going to start as a new nurse verrry soon, and i just know that i will make some of these hilarious mistakes.

Yup & more!

I did the VERY best thing the other day & I have NO excuse because I've years of experience.

I was working with a student & a call came in from theatre to pick up a patient, she wasn't mine but I was up to date whereas the nurse who had this patient was doing an admission so I said I'd go & take the student with me. Another nurse in earshot handed me some notes & said would I mind taking her patient down because I was going anyway.

So I grab the notes. The patient was in the last room before the theatre lift & on the way I start chatting to the student asking her if there's anything else she wants to know/do etc etc etc. I get into the lift, press the button go to theatres & just before I hit recovery realise...........OOPs...have patient's notes but :smackingf where's the patient!!!!

The student & I giggled all the way back up the lift to the nursing floor. Patient thought it was hilarious too & I'm sure my colleagues will NOT let me forget this in a long time because I'm usually the organised one!

Specializes in ortho/neuro/general surgery.

At the end of a tiring nightshift recently I reported lung sounds as "active" and bowel sounds as "fine crackles in the bases".

Specializes in ICU, midwifery, Nurse Practitioner.
I had just finished walking a nursing student thru her first foley cath when she looked up with pride in her voice and announced that it was the first one she had seen that wasn't hard.

:rotfl: :chuckle :rotfl: :chuckle :rotfl: :chuckle :rotfl:

Very Funny!!

Specializes in Neuro.

A few weeks ago on my clinical unit a group of nurses was discussing a pt's EKG findings and what they meant. Among them was a nursing student doing her preceptorship. One of the nurses wanted to know what an inverted T wave meant on an EKG, and turned to the student, figuring she would have that info fresh in her mind. She smiled really big and said..

"An inverted T wave means it's upside down."

Specializes in OB, ortho/neuro, home care, office.

in nursing school I once charted that a patient had 'gunky' breath sounds. If that wasn't bad enough I then followed that with a care plan that said the same thing. I am certain if that instructor would've been there at the pregraduation dinner then I would've caught heck for that. lol

Haven't heard a 'gunky' patient since.

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