Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart?

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To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply

Darwin Consult

and was signed by the resident. Well the attending did laugh, but it was not the highpoint of that residents day.

so do you have more?

One time our lab lost a 24 hour urine. How can you lose a bright orange gallon container full of pee?

Just a few days ago, some nurses lost a Golytely prep.

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not an order, but it was funny anyway, working in a busy er with a 5 hour wait , at least. Pt came up , I said whats your main complaint . She said , I have an Std. I say , "what symptoms are you having. " she says "green drainage" , I say(after taking a long relaxing deep breath, ). Do you have unprotected sex (amoung other questions) ...she said ,"No,,,,,I take Zolof (spelling?). I said, why do you have an std form Zolof...she said, I was watching a tv comercial , they said it has sexual side effects.

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Specializes in ortho/neuro/general surgery.

On a lap chole pt last week: "Internal Medical Service consult for obesity" Not for hypertension, or diabetes, or the other comorbid conditions they manage on surgical patients, just "obesity". I guess they have a miracle cure now.

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I worked at a teaching hospital on the Surgical Floor and one of my good friends is an intern there.

One night a patient saw a mouse run under her bed, so joking around we call Rachel (the intern) and she wrote a note saying:

" Contacted by nursing staff due to pt's anxiety, caused by seeing a mouse in her room. Housekeeping en-route.":jester:

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"patient may sleep with husband"

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Specializes in CVICU, CCU, MICU, SICU, Transplant.

Had a very sarcastic interventional cardiologist who was angry (and rightfully so) about the pt's diet the morning after having a stent...

wrote " please give pt more pieces of bacon; 2 is not enough"

lol

the nurse who took care of him was not very bright, and made the grave mistake of paging him and asking for clarification on how many pieces of bacon he meant :-)

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Specializes in CVICU, CCU, MICU, SICU, Transplant.

Had another cardiologist (from the same group) become furious bc of an error regarding a medication that wasn't d/c'd, either bc of an error by pharmacy and/or the nurse.

He took an order sheet and literally wrote on every single line throughout the whole page " D/C ASPIRIN"

hmmm.... very subtle. does he want the aspirin d/c'd ? :-)

those docs were real comedians

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Specializes in Utilization Management.
Had another cardiologist (from the same group) become furious bc of an error regarding a medication that wasn't d/c'd, either bc of an error by pharmacy and/or the nurse.

He took an order sheet and literally wrote on every single line throughout the whole page " D/C ASPIRIN"

hmmm.... very subtle. does he want the aspirin d/c'd ? :-)

those docs were real comedians

Came across an order like that just last night. The pulmonologist wrote, covering the entire page in huge letters:

A.M. CXR PA AND LATERAL THAT WAS ORDERED LAST P.M.

Gee, ya think he wanted a chest X-ray? :uhoh21:

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Specializes in Utilization Management.
Had a very sarcastic interventional cardiologist who was angry (and rightfully so) about the pt's diet the morning after having a stent...

wrote " please give pt more pieces of bacon; 2 is not enough"

lol

the nurse who took care of him was not very bright, and made the grave mistake of paging him and asking for clarification on how many pieces of bacon he meant :-)

PLEASE tell me she was a night-shift nurse and put the call out at 0300....:devil:

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Specializes in MR Peds, geris, psych, DON,ADON,SSD.

Diagnosis: FOP=full of poop

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not an order, but it was funny anyway, working in a busy er with a 5 hour wait , at least. Pt came up , I said whats your main complaint . She said , I have an Std. I say , "what symptoms are you having. " she says "green drainage" , I say(after taking a long relaxing deep breath, ). Do you have unprotected sex (amoung other questions) ...she said ,"No,,,,,I take Zolof (spelling?). I said, why do you have an std form Zolof...she said, I was watching a tv comercial , they said it has sexual side effects.

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Now, that's FUNNY!

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I was doing chart Q. A.'s one night on nurses notes. I came across one that was short and to the point, but when read out loud was hilarious:

"lady partsl packing out. Doctor in."

Now where did your mind go?:chuckle

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