Frustrated with the image of nursing

[Missa]

I'm getting really tired of the lack of respect I receive as a nurse. I would like to tell you about a recent example of something that infuriated me. I attended a Fantasia party (a home party for "sensual" items) at a friend's house a couple of nights ago. At one point, I left the room to use the washroom. Upon my return, the salesperson was showing off a "naughty nurse" outfit. The other guests of the party all enthusiastically agreed that I needed to buy that one. I like to think that I'm a pretty fun, open minded, easy going person, but this ticked me off! :angryfire I replied that I had no interest in such an outfit and as a professional nurse, I found it to be offensive. The conversation ended abruptly and the salesperson moved on to the "sexy maid" outfit. :icon_roll I think part of the reason that this upset me so much was that all of the other guests (including my friend who was the host) were female lawyers (traditionally a male profession). I have always got the feeling that my lawyer friend does not respect what I do. I get the impression that to her a nurse is someone who couldn't cut it in med school. Honestly, I haven't got all of my feelings on this subject worked out in my mind yet, but I do know that I have dedicated years of my life to getting where I am today. I completed a 3 year diploma nursing program 8 years ago. I did a 4 month critical care certificate program 5 years ago and most recently, I completed my BScN (I graduate tomorrow!). I have worked in a neuro/trauma ICU for 5 years. It is challenging work and I love it. Not just anyone can do it....I'm quite certain that my lawyer friend could not. I just want to scream that nurses are intelligent and play a huge part in our health care system. We are not hand maidens of the doctors and most importantly we're not doctor wannabes! Nursing and medicine are different professions and should be equally respected. I chose to be a nurse not because I couldn't get into med school, but because it was the right profession for me!!! However, I'm getting so frustrated with being looked down upon by society that I'm considering leaving the profession for one that garners more respect. This makes me very sad. Does anyone else feel this way?

[Multicollinearity, BSN, RN]

I would have done the same thing you did. And felt the same way. This might sound like I'm reaching...but don't you think a housekeeper might have felt badly at the 'sexy maid' outfit too? I think this is about the objectification of women at large.

You are correct, the public does not understand the value of nurses, and how highly trained they are. Goes to the 'dumb but caring' stereotype. Sadly, I see the behavior of *a few* nurses reinforcing the old stereotypes.

Your lawyer friend probably couldn't do what you do as a nurse...and you probably couldn't do what she does as a lawyer. I wish we could appreciate others contributions (including housekeepers/maids) and not feel superior to others. I'm not directing this at you; this just makes me reflect on these issues.

Anyway, this will slooooooooowly change.

[buddiage]

I'd like to respond, and you can take it with a grain of salt.

I totally understand your point of view. I do hate the image of nurses being the doctor's sex crazed bimbos too, and I HATE women being marginalized and "bimbo-i-fied" on television. My take on this might suprise you.

So you were at a special party that recognizes that some couples do a little role playing in the bedroom (reminds me of a story I heard where a guy dressed in a batman costume came flying in the bedroom where his wife was tied to the bed, got knocked out, and uhhhh...well, he needed medical care despite the awkward predicament he was in. I hope Marvel comics wouldn't be offended at that!)

The no brainer "hey you're a nurse you should get it" comment was probably not meant to be condescending to you or your proffesion. Maybe this is a bad example, but maybe it's like saying "all hunters like labradors" or something. It was an assumption.

I totally understand what your point was, and due to the fact that there is some merit to what you are saying, especially regarding the ignorant general public, I think it's easy to be sensitive to those kind of remarks. I doubt these ladies meant any harm or would believe that you are a nursing bimbo. I am SURE that couples around the world have played "doctor" in the bedroom for fun, and don't mean it to demean physicians. I doubt it would be as much fun as playing "lawyer." Sheesh...what could you do with a navy blue conservative suit and a fee schedule? :-)

Just my thoughts on it. Don't worry about it. I know what you're saying, but I don't think they meant that it was what they really thought of you.

[firstyearstudent]

Women in every profession are sexually objectified, from the nerdy teacher/librarian who whips off her glasses and shakes out her hair to the lady welder (!?!?) in Flashdance... I wouldn't take it too personally.

[burn out]

I would also love to see the image of nurses changed but as a group we can not even agree on anything long enough to decide who we are and where we want to go as a profession let alone how we want to be viewed. We can't even agree on an entry level into nursing for how many years now?

[PANurseRN1]

Play with fire, bound to get burned.

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

I HATE women being marginalized and "bimbo-i-fied" on television

The women are doing this to themselves though, and i think that's what infuriates me the most about it.

[buddiage]

The women are doing this to themselves though, and i think that's what infuriates me the most about it.

Totally.

My husband watches, gulp, "pro wrestling" on television, and I hate the bimbos. Every once in a while, I'll make a snide remark about it. I feel that they are doing it to themselves, and in a sense, doing it to the rest of us (does that even make sense?)

[rn/writer, RN]

Maybe a good comeback would have been to say you'd consider buying the naughty nurse outfit right after she bought the naught lawyer version.

I know it's frustrating to feel looked down upon. The thing is, the angrier you get, the more credibility you give that point of view. It is far more effective, when you run across ignorant or stereotypical comments, to adopt a quizzical look as if you can't quite believe what you just heard. Then you can say something like, "I thought that kind of backward thinking died out ages ago."

Sputtering and fuming let others know they've pushed our buttons. And sometimes, THAT is their primary objective. Other times, the speaker is just ill-informed and going ballistic is overkill. It's so much more impressive to stay cool and collected than to blow up or fall apart.

I try to keep one of Miss Manner's secret weapons up my sleeve at all times. When someone comes out with a question or comment that is just outrageous, she summons up every ounce of dignity she can muster, raises her eyebrows, and says, "Excuse me?" She puts the speaker on the defensive and lets them know they've crossed the line without so much as mussing her hair.

[Multicollinearity, BSN, RN]

The women are doing this to themselves though, and i think that's what infuriates me the most about it.

Agree. It used to be that men objectified women. Now women objectify themselves. Have you been reading Maureen Dowd, Marie?

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

I feel that they are doing it to themselves, and in a sense, doing it to the rest of us (does that even make sense?)

It makes perfect sense. And i'd personally like to thank those that attempt to get ahead in life using their "assets" instead of their minds.:angryfire

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

Have you been reading Maureen Dowd, Marie?

Well, yes and no. I bought "Are Men Necessary" (No, wasn't too wild about the title, i thought it was a bit much, a slam to men in itself) around Christmas break, but only made it to page 2 before i got slammed with overtime at work.