Feeling really down in the dumps and friend-less in nursing school...advice needed

Published

Hi. I am 1 semester away from being done with nursing school.

I am a really high achiever and get fantastic grades in both the lecture and clinical portions of my program.

At the beginning of the program, I felt like I met really good people that were wonderful friends. But as time went on, I feel like that is not the case at all. As the semesters went on, we got divided up into different clinical groups and people started to get mad at me for doing very well on exams and for ATI tests. They used to approach me after tests demanding to know what grade I got, and when I told them they got angry. This semester I have decided not to tell anyone and to just say "I did good" to prevent this hostility.

For example, 1 girl who I felt very close with last year hasn't spoken to me at all after I received points for passing a test and she did not. These people seem to behave very childishly and I feel like I am back in high school.

I have one really good friend (I think) but he is in another clinical group this time around and I feel as though it kind of distances us, which is very unfortunate.

I just feel extremely depressed about the entire situation and just decided to come on this wonderful forum to see some comments as to what others have done in situations like this.

I feel like such a loner =[

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Fear not! You'll be their boss one day. Just watch ;)

Up Vote Up Vote ×

. Great job in school, I'll look to duplicate your efforts in my next few years!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Be proud of your grades, you earned them. Negativity is not the quality that you need in a friend.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Hi. I am 1 semester away from being done with nursing school.

I am a really high achiever and get fantastic grades in both the lecture and clinical portions of my program.

At the beginning of the program, I felt like I met really good people that were wonderful friends. But as time went on, I feel like that is not the case at all. As the semesters went on, we got divided up into different clinical groups and people started to get mad at me for doing very well on exams and for ATI tests. They used to approach me after tests demanding to know what grade I got, and when I told them they got angry. This semester I have decided not to tell anyone and to just say "I did good" to prevent this hostility.

For example, 1 girl who I felt very close with last year hasn't spoken to me at all after I received points for passing a test and she did not. These people seem to behave very childishly and I feel like I am back in high school.

I have one really good friend (I think) but he is in another clinical group this time around and I feel as though it kind of distances us, which is very unfortunate.

I just feel extremely depressed about the entire situation and just decided to come on this wonderful forum to see some comments as to what others have done in situations like this.

I feel like such a loner =[

I had a eerily similar situation like this when I went to school. What I learned is that: 1) There are cliques. Apparently, high school antics is never ever over. 2) Do not tell other people your grades. All grades, whether they be high or low, were dissected and drama would ensue.

Chin up! Be proud of your achievement. Do not let their negativity get to you. You are there to learn and then pass boards. :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I definitely know what you're going through.

After deciding that I was going to go the medical route and started taking my science pre-reqs (Chem, BioChem, OChem, Biology, etc) I realized that people whom I thought were my "friends" were only there to use me. They would constantly ask me what I obtained on my tests and quizzes and then asked if we could form a study group, meet outside of class. Myself, being completely naive at the time, didn't think much of it.

After the course would end, I would never speak to those people again. They never texted me and never made an attempt to communicate with me after it.

Again, I completely know how you feel and I understand that it can be frustrating that you feel like a loner just because you do good on your exams/quizzes. But don't worry! In the end, you worked your butt off and you're going to get somewhere! There's always a bump in the road, don't let that stop you! You worked so hard, don't let this stop you!

And you're not a loner! You got all of us here on the forums!

Good luck to you and take care!!! (:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

You aren't alone! I understand exactly what you're talking about. I know one in particular who loves to tell me his/her grades, so we always get into a weird competition. (I scored higher on the last test, ha.) Anyway, I've learned over the years that friendship is not always priority. Don't try to change yourself to become someone other people will like.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Hospital Education Coordinator.

you are in this for you, not them. You may never encounter them after nursing school. That said, you could be off-setting people in some manner and could ask a trusted friend or relative (outside the school) to give you some honest feedback about the vibes you send out. Otherwise, get your degree, get your license and be proud of your accomplishments.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Congratulations on doing so very well. I've found that some people never outgrow that high school mentality. I'm sure your classmates are behaving this way because they are jealous. It's easier for them to be hostile to you than face that fact that they have problems. You should be very proud of your accomplishments. Don't let them bring you done. You are almost finished and more than likely will not see too many of them afterward.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

You are right at the end.....some people are jealous, some people are just mean. You will probably never seen these people once you graduate and start your nursing journey. If you are really down....go see your PCP make sure everything is OK. You are embarking on a great journey as you transition from a student to a nurse.....get your strength from within.

"

And Remember....

"No one can make you feel inferior without your permission".....Eleanor Roosevelt

happy_thanksgiving-1991.gif

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Inorder to satisfy their insecurities, give them the wrong information by telling a low grade or score. This worked for me when I was in the same situation as you are.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Thank you all so very much for your comments and kind encouragement. I do feel better today about it and it helped to come home after a long day of clinical and read all the responses.

And one comment in particular really made me think..the comment about how I probably won't even talk to these people after its all said and done. Over the summer the one "real friend" I had, did not contact me for any reason at all....the entire summer. Good friend, huh?

And you know what I get from another one....One person who was another "dear friend" from my first clinical rotation only texts me before tests to ask questions....for example "What is the difference between a calcium channel blocker and a beta blocker?"...I respond...and then that is the end of the convo. They definitely use me for their own benefit and then its obvious that that is the purpose I serve for them.

So, in conclusion, I am just going to get through the rest of this program and rely on my family and boyfriend for support because at least I know from that from them it is sincere. (and from all of you fine ladies and gents)

Thanks again. It really made me feel better to discuss with people who are outside of the situation.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion