Feel Horrible, Have Lost All Confidence....

[LatinRN1]

Hi everyone-

I was hired recently working in a MISU at a trauma II center, I love the staff and what I have learned so far. Today was my actual 4th shift orienting. Everything was going amazing until today!

Pt a morbidly obese with respiratory failure, has been on ICU for a few weeks, had a trach placed a couple of weeks ago. Pt had been receiving meds and tube feeding from NG tube. Today they placed a Peg Tube, the GI MD and RT/Endo Tech went up to ICU to do the procedure. This was my mentors/mine patient and since one of the things I have to do during orientation is "Conscious Sedation", this was the chance for me to do it.

My mentor and I went over real quick the procedure in the med room, then went into the room with the pt.

Pt asked for Benadryl, Fentanyl and Versed. I pushed the first two with no issues, then when the Versed came, the MD had asked for 2 versed and I pushed the whole thing, which were 5. My mentor noticed and then since the pt was still alert, the MD asked for more versed and this was when my mentor said all 5 had been pushed in by me, which I was orienting. He initially said, "Thats not good" but kept going and finally asked for a total of 7 Versed, plus the Benadryl and Fentanyl..

My whole confidence dropped to the floor after this screwed up. The patient was on a vent, ended up needing more than the 5 and had no s/s of any distress, but the simple fact that I messed up makes me feel horrible!

My mentor explained and talked to me afterwards and I told her I simply misunderstood the instruction wrong, which was the true and in no way I am blaming her, it is my responsibility My mentor mentioned it to my manager and since the pt ended up needing more and nothing happened, the manager just told my mentor to talk to me about the incident.. I thank God nothing bad happened, no write ups or anything, but now I feel very insecure, ashamed, embarrassed and like the most stupid person in the world! =(

How can I get over this?? All these past 4 days I had been receiving praised from the staff, but this incident just makes me feel so low of myself...

[shermrn]

Everyone is bound to make mistakes, luckily your mistake had no adverse effects. You were also honest about the incidnet and have likely learned a valuable lesson. Don't let it ruin your orientation, accept it and move on.

[preppyrn, BSN, MSN, RN, APRN]

I agree with shermrn. I know it's hard, especially as nurses we are "people pleasers" in a way. You were doing an excellent job in your new unit and you will continue to do so. Mistakes happen, everyone makes them. The important thing is to learn how big of a mistake it was, if there are adverse effects, and who it is important to inform. There is probably not a single nurse who can honesty say they've never made a mistake in their job. Each day in nursing is a learning experience. Be honest, know what you did wrong, and take that into the next situation better prepared.

[Marshall1]

Unfortunately, mistakes are going to happen - doesn't matter how long you are a nurse because you are human first (though I know some nurses who present themselves as perfect - it's not possible)..as the other posters stated..nothing happened, you were honest/took responsibility, your mentor and the manager don't seem to be making a big deal out of it so you shouldn't either. Unless they mention it leave it alone and don't call anymore attention to it. Focus on your next shift and the rest of the orientation. You will be fine.

[SleeepyRN]

I havent worked in a hospital, so forgive me. I'm confused. What did you do wrong? You followed his orders. Could someone explain this to me for learning purposes?

[SleeepyRN]

I havent worked in a hospital, so forgive me. I'm confused. What did you do wrong? You followed his orders. Could someone explain this to me for learning purposes?

Ohh, you pushed 5 instead of two? How did your preceptor not catch this before you could do it.

[Tait, MSN, RN]

The reason it feels so bad is because it was a learning experience. Most of my first med errors were also ones, that in the end, seemed to benefit the patient (120mg Solu-Medrol instead of 60mg etc). The good thing is now you will always remember to double check, just one more time, the dose. Don't let one slip destroy the fact that you are doing a good job. Learning, growing, and making mistakes are how strong, capable nurses are made.

**hug**

Tait

[Roseyposey]

It sounds like you have learned from the experience, and that is all you can do. The patient was not harmed, and you will be more careful next time. There's not a nurse who's been in practice for any length of time who has not made a med error. It feels horrible. I thought for sure I was going to be fired and lose my license when I made my first med error (which in the grand scheme of med errors, was not a big one). I called the doctor, wrote myself up, and told the patient's family. The nurses I worked with were very supportive, and they all told me about the errors they have made. It happens; go on and be the most careful, fabulous nurse you can be!

[CharleeFoxtrot, BSN, RN]

The best thing you can do is what you already have done-learned from the mistake. But you still need to forgive yourself, these things happen and since it was a "no harm no foul" shake yourself up and go forward

[Morainey, BSN, RN]

I read in Something for the Pain about an ER doc who sent someone with chest pain home who came back later and died from a MI. He felt awful about it, obviously, and asked for advice from his mentor who said, you're going to feel really bad about it for awhile. Then you'll feel better.

I'm glad that you are owning your mistake and learning from it, rather than blaming other people or making excuses. I think good nurses learn from their screw-ups and build guardrails into their safety practices to make sure they never happen again.

(Something for the Pain: Compassion and Burnout in the ER: Paul Austin: 9780393337792: Amazon.com: Books

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone. Makes. Mistakes. The only people who say they don't are either lying or too stupid to realize that they've made one. What matters is what you do AFTER you've made the mistake. As long as you admit to the mistake as soon as you've realized that you've made one and immediately set about mitigating the damage, you're doing the right thing. And that's exactly what it sounds like you did. You won't make that same mistake again will you?

[SaoirseRN]

Feel what you are feeling and accept your mistake, which it sounds you are doing. Feel thankful that the patient was not adversely affected by this mistake, and learn from it. You will never do that again, right? And likely you will remember to always double check in the future. Lesson learned, take a breath, and move on.

We are all human. We all have made mistakes of some sort. Be grateful nobody was hurt. The praise you are getting means you are doing a good job, so don't let this ruin your confidence.