thought these were funny and true. add on if desired....
Alas, sometimes in the ER the family is harder to deal with than the patient. Here are some family member we all have seen in our ER:
DOORWAY GAWKER- stands and stares at the staff, arms folded, from the doorway with an impatient, angry looks on their faces
THE VENTRILOQUIST - talks for the patient until you tell them to stop it
THE SHADOW- you have to pry this person away from the patients bedside in order to do your job. then they watch every move you make as you start an IV, give meds, etc.
APATHETIC ANN/ANDY - brings a book, laptop - has a sort of been here/done this attitude - seems uninterested in whats going on
THE SUCKER - accompanies a patient with some kind of bogus chronic problem and has bought into it hook, line and sinker
THE KLEPTOMANIAC - you might catch this person rummaging through the cupboards, drawers and perhaps pocketing a thing or two
THE ERRAND RUNNER - may come up to the desk requesting warm blankets, footies, water, food, more pain meds, etc etc etc
MAMAS BOY MAMA - accompanies their grown son or daughter to the ER and sits with concerned look at bedside
BABY DADDY - accompanies girlfriend to ER and is suspicious of any male that comes into the room. Wants to stay there when pelvic exam is being done.
THE DUMPER- drops off confused mom/dad/annoying sibling/girlfriend/boyfriend and leaves
SPACE INVADERS - crosses that line into the staff area or follows the doctor into their area - definitely a no no
MAJOR HOLIDAY GIFTERS - brings mom/dad/grandma who they haven't seen for months to ER because they "aren't doing that well/can't take care of themselves/need to go to a nursing home"
CHICKEN LITTLE - runs to triage desk requesting help for mom/dad/etc in the car who are dying (99% of the time they are fine). Comes up to the desk and tells you heart monitor is dinging - is that OK??!!!
SUSPICIOUS STAN/STELLA- takes notes - wants names of staff, name of medication, name of tests. Has special "medical notebook"
1) 25yo female with severe, severe, SEVERE....canker sores.
Darn, I was all wound up to start a resuscitation and she let me down.
2) People that come in moaning, groaning, have to be assisted by two people to a wheelchair, and then almost fall out of the chair thrashing in pain. Barely survive the triage, and if the wait for the doc could have been any longer they would have expired in the room. The doc does the exam, they get something like a neb, or a shot of Toradol for their troubles, and ten minutes later walk out totally normal and under their own power. Family doesn't see anything unusual about that behavior- and tells the story about how Aunt Jen nearly died in our ER when they come in the next week. (notice how they never tell about how we miraculously saved her, haha)
3) The dude visitor (has always been a guy for me) that hears the plan of care and says "I knew we shouldn't have bothered with this Bandaid station." Right in front of me. I carried a Bandaid in my pocket for the next month in case he came back. lol.
4) I ask a kid what their pain is on a scale of one to ten, and mom says "Ten- TEN, right honey?"
5) We get on our tiny ER a coding child, and the one nurse (me), and 4 EMS people (3 basics with good intentions and 1 paramedic), the doc, and 2 terrified parents are trying to keep him/her alive. A cop shows up, elbows into the resuscitation room up to the head of the bed, and starts his interrogation of the mom. "Ma'am, can you tell me what happened?......MA'AM?! WHAT HAPPENED?" Cop leaves after being vibed with the RN stare of death from across the room, because if I had been the one carrying the gun that night he would have been on the floor.
This is great!!! I love it!!! Er...umm...I mean...
FOR PETE'S SAKE PEOPLE!! WHERE IS YOUR COMPASSION??? I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU PEOPLE ARE NURSES!!!!
:bdyhdclp:
Are you joking?
Perhaps shadowing an ER nurse on the afternoon shift for a short 8 hours would help you understand the humor of all of this. Funny sick humor is all we have at times to get us through the shift....lighten up
They either walked in, or rode in on EMS, but they need a ride home. They cant take the bus because, its cold, windy, rainy,.... whatever and can't call a cab they dont have enough money, they are here now and we need to figure out how to transport them home.
hahahaha....We get those daily! One thing we have resorted to with these patients and it has stopped some of the freq. flyers.....we cannot give narcs to people who do not have a ride home. Then allllll of a sudden, Aunt Nancy can suddenly come to pick them up....amazing:lol2:
yep, Larry's are out there....hahahaha....I have resorted to telling them my husband is the Chief of police in conversation...hahahahaha....stops em short each time. (of couse it's a lie.....my husband is not a cop) hahahahaha
We had to explain to our new doc that a pt "sinkholed" out in the waiting room. He jumped up ready to save the world and said "Someone syncoped in the waiting room?" I looked at him and said "SINKHOLED". He said, "What's that?" I told him it's when the drama queen just kind of melts into the floor like the wicked witch of the west, you know, like the sinkhole that swallows your house, car, etc. He almost wet his pants.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
you can be a concerned family member without fitting into one of these categories. unless you are standing at the curtain, tapping your foot and glaring until someone asks you if you need anything and you proceed to launch into a diatribe about how we have a lot of nerve taking care of other patients, etc. then you can choose the moniker of your choice. it's been said before, but i'll say it again. er staff. blowing off steam. so we can go back to work relatively sane. so we can sit in triage and have abuse hurled our way for a 12 hour shift. my goodness, i guess we really are the red-headed stepchildren of the profession. (no offense to either red-heads or stepchildren, of course...)
blee
nah, it's not that you're the red-headed stepchildren. it's just that you're the more prolific writers. i'm in the icu, and the icu threads aren't nearly as funny or prolific -- so your forum attracts more of every kind of attention. i got my share of the "omg, if you really feel that way, you shouldn't be a nurse" and "i hope my mother/father/husband/etc. doesn't get you for a nurse because you're so mean" comments! and what i want to tell them all is "if you can't laugh, you won't last!"
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
are you joking?
perhaps shadowing an er nurse on the afternoon shift for a short 8 hours would help you understand the humor of all of this. funny sick humor is all we have at times to get us through the shift....lighten up
Love it... had one the other day. Family member half dead with big head bleed on vent ask me "are they going to get to go home today?" And she had just told me she was a nurse... What the?????????
Happeetxn
85 Posts
This thread is quite possibly the funniest thing I have read in God only knows how long. The GOMER score had me crying I was laughing so hard.
And I am offended..........that there aren't more than 6 pages of replies so far. To the OP this is GREAT.
Craig