Dropping out of nursing

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hi all,

I am halfway through my nursing program. however, everything that can go wrong has gone wrong. I am thinking about dropping out and restarting as soon as things settle down. Do you think that I will ruin my chances of graduating or an I doing the right thing?

Thx!

Specializes in Telemetry.

Girl, I would stay with him and keep my eyes on the prize...I have been through the same thing during nursing college and I am still holding on and yes it affected me but it motivated me at the same time to do well to graduate on time. I will be graduating January and I am happy. My life is in turmoil but I decided to hold on to my dream and take the monitory support from my husband until I can paddle on my own. Mind you, I have not told my husband about my plans. I am playing it safe for school that is all.

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Specializes in Float.
I think you'd probably find it harder to go to school if you divorced. If I were you I'd pretend to turn a blind eye to the cheating for now, live off the husband's salary, finish school and find a job. THEN I'd find a lawyer and take him to the cleaners. Don't get sad, look out for your own interests first and then deal with the cheating husband.

:yeahthat:and then, :trout: his sorry behind. Get with your girlfriends and do this :cheers: because you've made it and proved that the :devil: is a liar! Finally, give yourself a :icon_hug: and some :redpinkhe and get ready to meet a more mature man to spend time with :w00t:

I wish you well!

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Specializes in Operating Room.

I totally agree with all the ladies in this thread. Focus on yourself. Men come and go, but a degree is forever! Use him for all hes worth and then deal with the at-home situation once you're done with school. Hang in there!

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

Normally, I shy away from advising people what to do in these intensely personal and individual situations, but do not let this man take away your future as well as all the other things he is taking away from you that you cannot control. We know. It hurts. Try to hang on as hard as you can to school as a life raft, it will mean your ability to support yourself and hold your head high. Hugs :redpinkhe

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Specializes in ICU.

Something to consider...

In divorce court, I have had friends who were held, I don't know how to correctly word it, but liable for the money spent on their education by the spouse. If your husband has been paying for your education (as opposed to taking out student loans in your name) then that is something he can come back at you for. Perhaps it would best to cut that tie off sooner rather than later. I would advise talking to a lawyer first as well.

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Specializes in ICU.

Also, I think I would be more distracted/distraught with the idea of living with a man I know is cheating on me than going through a divorce. Maybe it's just my fierce independence, but the instant I thought my husband wasn't holding up his end of the bargain in the marriage, I wouldn't want another penny of his money supporting me to my dreams. I would rather cut him loose, figure out my own way and hold my head high knowing I didn't need his cheating, looser butt for a n y t h i n g. Just my view though ;) Good luck in whatever you decide! You deserve soo much better!!!

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That is hard to deal with but, if possible get your degree, and don't let his unfaithfulness set you back, he has done' enough already, you deserve this and he deserves to regret his actions sooner than later.

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Specializes in Float.
Something to consider...

In divorce court, I have had friends who were held, I don't know how to correctly word it, but liable for the money spent on their education by the spouse. If your husband has been paying for your education (as opposed to taking out student loans in your name) then that is something he can come back at you for. Perhaps it would best to cut that tie off sooner rather than later. I would advise talking to a lawyer first as well.

???? If the divorce is due to circumstances beyond her control, such as her husband's cheating, I hardly think he'd have a leg to stand on. But of course, I'm no lawyer so it would be best to consult a lawyer privately.

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Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics.
???? If the divorce is due to circumstances beyond her control, such as her husband's cheating, I hardly think he'd have a leg to stand on. But of course, I'm no lawyer so it would be best to consult a lawyer privately.

I agree best to consult lawyer because I know of a lot of cases, where if the woman was the SAHM in a divorce preceding the dad had to continue to pay alimony until she is done with school so she can have a chance at a stable future as well.

Now I don't agree with taking him to the cleaners, that is just about tit for tat and who can hurt who more, I would say, get your degree and walk away.

Is it easy staying in an unhappy relationship? Nope not at all and it is stressful.

I am in a similar situation, my husband isn't cheating, and since this can be seen by everyone I won't go into details but he is not a good person and it is not a good situation. I have 4 children and I was a SAHM for the past 10 years with my husband not wanting me to work and back then I didn't fight it. I enjoyed raising my children. Then I decided I wanted more and the fact was I was very unhappy and I knew I would never be in a position to leave him and support me and my kids ON MY OWN (child support is not always guaranteed, ordered maybe, but not guaranteed) without some sort of plan, so I decided to go to school. What a big fight that was, my husband is fully aware I intend on leaving him, although I don't think he believes I will. Although I will. Through the years I had hope that maybe things could work but I still would not give up on school.

I have 4 children, it is not realistic for me to just leave now. If I did the chance I would be back in school is slim. My husband has made it known I am on my own if I leave now and he is self employed and can easily fix his income. I would be looking at a life of Min. wage jobs and assistance with no real way to get ahead. This is if I were to be realistic. I would also probably never get to see my kids, which are my reason for living, between working 2 jobs to support them with the bare necessities and lets not even talk about being able to make it back to school.

Although my situation is a very bad and toxic situation, it's not emergent. Not at the moment anyway, I am not sure about when I finally leave. But it's not like I am getting beat up or my kids are getting beat up and my husband works out of state for 5 months of the year, so me needing to leave isn't emergent. If he started cheating, I would get through and don't consider that emergent for my situation either. Honestly I wouldn't care if he did, as long as he left me alone. Sometimes I wish he would so he woul move on because HIM being the one to end things and move on is the only way he would still provide for us until I was done with school.

Anyway, is it easy to go to school and have all this going on and have my 4 kids??? Absolutely not. But I have been through a lot worse growing up and it has made a very strong person. I focus on my goal, Graduation, Nclex and a job. I have been throw an absurd amount of hurdles throughout this whole school process and the ONLY thing that has kept me sane and kept me going was keeping my eye on the prize and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I know once I have a job that although it might be hard, I will be able to support me and my children no matter what my husband decides to do.

Sometimes our choices are not the easiest, or the most ideal, but we have to look at what is the most realistic at the time for us to achieve those better paths in the end.

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Mi Vida Loca.........:icon_hug: Hang in there girl, it will all be worth it in the end!

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If there is any way you feel that you can get through the rest of your schooling during this difficult time then please do it. But if you feel that there is no way that you can continue on and pass your classes then perhaps you should try again later. However, If you stop now, it is VERY likely you will never go back and will regret it forever no matter how hard it is for you to continue on now. {{HUGS}} I am so sorry you are going through this!

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Specializes in ICU.
???? If the divorce is due to circumstances beyond her control, such as her husband's cheating, I hardly think he'd have a leg to stand on. But of course, I'm no lawyer so it would be best to consult a lawyer privately.

What "should be" and what "will be" are two very different things in the court room. I have heard of far more unfair things happening then the aforementioned scenario.

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