Does anybody else feel guilty about calling off?

Published

I was wondering if anybody else on here has call off guilt, my husband says I am crazy because of it. I am on light duty and had called off 2 days after sustaining a back injury moving a patient. My manager is great is accommodating with my restrictions so I am one day back to work and now I have 2 sick kids at home with what looks like strep throat, so obviously I will be taking them to the doc tomorrow. Is it ingrained in us in nursing school to feel guilty when missing work or is it just me?

Specializes in ICU.
It might be your turn to be off at home, but certainly not at work.

This is when you need a back up plan. Some one else needs to take the kids to the doctor and care for them

No wonder you are feeling guilty . Your job does not revolve around your family life.

Typically my mom is my back up plan but she is in the hospital at this time s/p hysterectomy. And unfortunately since I don't know when my kids will be sick I can not revolve my schedule around such things.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Psych, LTC/SNF, Rehab, Corrections.

I dont feel guilty when im actually sick. I dont call off unless im sick, either.

If I had children, I wldnt feel guilty for taking off to care for my children. My babies > My coworkers. Be real.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU.
My question was directed at the guilt that nurses have for calling off, just was curious to see where others thinks this guilt stems from for taking the time we need for ourselves or our children. My hospital specifically has sick family days for these instances. My post was not to solicit advice from you on what actions I should take when my children are sick. Also I don't think my kids will be helpless adults because I take off work once a year to take them to a doctors appointment. And coming from you I will take your comment about being sorry for my children as a compliment. I hope you are a more compassionate nurse than you are mother. Also thank you these discussions we just had cleared my mind of any guilt I had about taking a FAMILY SICK DAY.

My how nice!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Typically my mom is my back up plan but she is in the hospital at this time s/p hysterectomy. And unfortunately since I don't know when my kids will be sick I can not revolve my schedule around such things.

Guess that's where you need a backup to the backup plan.

I realize there are several issues going on right now, your injury, your mother's surgery, and the kid's illness.

Hopefully... it is all short term.. and everyone will be no worse for the wear!

I was a single parent... had to devise a back up to the back up plan. You may want to think about that now that this fiasco fell upon you.

Your facility appears to have a most generous time off plan.. but... it can be used up in a heartbeat.

If your back issue has not resolved..... please think about FMLA.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

This thread did not need to be turned into an argument about members' parenting skills. It's a legitimate question: do you feel guilty when calling off sick? My answer is, it varies. If I'm really violently ill, I don't give it two thoughts---I'm not going to take the risk of infecting my co-workers and patients.

If I need a mental health day, yes, I feel a little guilty, but on the rare occasion I do it anyway because I'll lose it if I don't. Besides, the facility I'm working for has a duty to staff appropriately---that is NOT my problem. They will simply have to call in someone else. End of story.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

And to reply to your original question:notworthy:.. I did feel guilty .. for awhile. The powers that be try to make us feel guilty that our coworkers and patients will be somehow be put out. Actually, the staffing office is put out.

In fact.. if you have the time to take off... take it any way you like. Just be careful how you use it.

I have a friend that was nurse of the year ...for years. She just got fired for attendance issues...

all I am saying is... watch your back.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ICU.

Yes the workmans comp team automatically files FMLA for my injury ..this has been the perfect storm of a terrible week. My normal schedule is 7p-7a which allows me to be home during the day with the kids. with my injury the work they have me doing is training staff on whatever competency needs done and quality meetings from 7a to 7p. I am hoping everything gets back to normal next week so I do not have anymore issues to worry about.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER, PACU, Med-Surg, Hospice, LTC.

We're Nurses. We were trained to feel guilty (jk).

I don't feel guilty. Well, I use to when I first started Nursing, but I learned to get over that.

Do certain people at work try to make employees who call in feel guilty? Of course they do. Nit-picking and quizzing everyone because they feel that a fellow employees sick day is their business. Bizarre. It's nobody's business why I used my sick day. Although, I do notice when those righteous individuals call in, they expect everyone to be understanding because their call was an 'emergency'.

The real problem is that the majority of Nurses work in facilities that do not provide adequate sick call and most facilities don't plan properly for the appropriate replacement staff for a sick call.

Three days off a year is a joke.

And nothing is more dangerous to patients and disrespectful to co-workers than coming in sick.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Family Medicine.
How many sick days do you get a year? Every hospital I've worked at you only get three for the whole year, after that it's a write up. I would be scared to waste mine when I wasn't sick cause with my luck I'd then catch the plague and be up a creek!

I only do, on average, 1 mental health day a year.

Our vacation and sick days are lumped into one bank. I get 29 a year and usually use them all for vacation.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I would rather take an extra load of patients than have a sick co-worker beside me!!!! If one is truly sick then they do not need to be around sicker people or spreading it to other staff. I rarely call out, but when I do it is for a legitimate reason and therefore, I do not feel guilty. I believe because we are there to take care of the sick and usually they are really, really sick patients, we do not feel we should either get sick ourselves or have care given to us because we are not as sick as they are. The goal is to keep yourself well, and by trying to do this keep from infecting others. If you are sick, stay home!!! Let the guilt fly elsewhere-----like you didn't get that cup of water for Mr. ______________!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU.
I only do, on average, 1 mental health day a year.

Our vacation and sick days are lumped into one bank. I get 29 a year and usually use them all for vacation.

Ours is broken down into sick and pto. Obviously you can't use vacation time when you're sick since one is preplanned and the other is short notice. I'm impressed with the amount of time off you get!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

I used to feel guilt then I had children. My family and my children come first. If They are sick I am with them. Even at age 12 and 13 they wanted their Mommy when they didn't feel good. My JOB is Mommy first nurse second. They facility might be angry but they will survive. So will my children....but they are my children and I am with them. Can my hubby do it....I suppose but it is My preference for ME!

They are now independent young adults. Intelligent independent. Top of their class. My daughter a freshman in nursing school and doing extremely well....and my son a senior in high school going into robotics also top of his class.

There are still times they want their Mom..and I'm good with that.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion