Do Nurses Eat Their Young?

Nurses Relations

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We have all heard the saying "Nurses eat their young". Do you feel this is true?

Please feel free to read and post any comments that you have right here in this discussion

Thanks.

This article sums it up for me... ?

http://www.dcardillo.com/articles/eatyoung.html

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This vile expression implies that experienced nurses do not treat new nurses kindly. My first problem with the statement is that it’s a generalization implying that all nurses are like that. Interestingly, whenever I hear someone utter the expression, I always say, “I don’t do that. Do you?” The person making the statement always says, “Oh no, I don’t, but many others do.” I’ve never heard even one nurse own up to doing this, although some nurses are willing to indict the entire profession. Every time that statement is repeated, it causes harm and casts a dark shadow on every nurse. Say anything enough, and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Please note that by moderator consensus some of the "Nurses Eat Their Young" posts will be referred to this thread where there can be an ongoing discussion, rather than several threads saying the same thing.

To students and new grads that are having problems with nurses, please take a moment to read the above link. Is it really the entire profession, every single nurse, or do you need help with one or a few nurses? We will be glad to help you in dealing with those people, but let bury the phrase "Nurses Eat Their Young".

To experienced nurses who claim our profession eats it's young, please take a moment to read it as well and think about it. Also take time to teach, be friendly and nurturing to the new nurse and students on your unit.

Specializes in Telemetry Med/Surg.
:-) Kudos. Yep, I had a very similar experience. Unfortunately for them, the people who have what I call the CNA mentality and think they're so superior because they've emptied foleys longer than someone else, miss that the second careers have a host of other skills and degrees which when combined with clinical knowlege are very marketable to a healthcare environment. Especially now.

Meanwhile the ones that were so nasty to me are still on the floor getting old with their bad backs, lousy pay and crazy patient ratios hating their jobs and their lives. Heartbreaker.

I love it!

When I first started, the seasoned nurses attempted to peck at me but they learned very quick as I told them. Im no child, I was a Marine for 8 years before nursing and led marines during war, don't treat me like I'm your child, I have a mother. Once they see you wont allow it, they move on.

I'm glad to hear you found a silver bullet that worked, but I am not exactly shrinking violet myself and took up for myself more times than I care to think about . Cause hell only knows nobody else there was going to. Even the nurses that knew better were intimidated they'd be the next victim of the resident buffalo of bullies if they ever stuck up for a new nurse.

Specializes in geriatrics.

I am also a second career nurse, well over 30 and I can agree with various points that have been raised here. For one, it seems to be that in many cases, some, (not all) seasoned nurses overlook the fact that customer service, communication, and administrative skills are learned in just about every profession. These are also important skills for nursing, but not unique to nursing.

The whole "new grad" stigma drives me nuts, because while we all started as new nurses, we are NOT all new to the workforce. Quite the contrary. Furthermore, the skill of say inserting an IV does not make anyone a nurse. It is the use of assessment, communication, etc...so when nurses go on about..."New grads can't do this or that..." Give me a break. Those nurses didn't just walk onto the floor on their first month knowing everything either.

Nevertheless, as I mentioned in an earlier post, ageism and stigma towards senior nurses also exists. And that's equally wrong. We can all benefit from being tolerant and willing to learn from each other. A more positive attitude all around makes for a much healthier workplace.

Specializes in CVICU, Obs/Gyn, Derm, NICU.
It goes both ways. In quite a few threads around here, I have also witnessed younger nurses make nasty, disparaging remarks about senior nurses. I think we all need to be reminded from time to time to have a little more tolerance and compassion for each other.

Absolutely agree ... I'm in my 40's and have had several poor comments directed at me by younger nurses.... whom I wouldn't call 'seasoned' but they are not new nurses either.

I do not feel 'old' ....however they have no qualms about suggesting I have an inferior education ( I have more university education than most of them) or stuff like I might not adapt to technology very easily (?really).

They will ignore me if their buddies are around ...they deliberately leave the older ones out of conversation in the break room.

A very long shift working with some of them.

I actually hear them laughing about the nurses in their 60's

This is the first time I'm feeling the ageist discrimination thing

Specializes in CVICU, Obs/Gyn, Derm, NICU.
I have too. But when I have seen that happen they're typically doing it to an older nurse that has been the recipient of hostility from other longer term nurses and they feel it's "safe". The whole thing has just GOT to stop. I blame most of all the clinical directors and managers and charge nurses who feel because they got picked on 25 years ago everyone should. No, they shouldn't. It creates an unpleasant environment for most, encourages bullies, costs a fortune in turnover for the network, stifles productivity, it's certainly one of the top reasons nursing is still not given the respect it deserves and people continue to make stereotypical slurs about women.

Agree ....but most of I blame the nurses who continue to tolerate it because 'that's how women are' type of thing.

I'm going to place those types in the same sorry bunch as the 'martyr marys'; also the codependent ones ' nursing is caring and caring is me'. These types are why we suffer from an image problem.

Sure I've been bullied and treated poorly over the years by both seasoned and newer nurses.

However I try and keep perspective. I ask myself what happened. Was it a rude exchange? Was the person being a jerk? Is the person a bully? Does the person lack social skills and a sense of boundaries? Do they come from a culture where women treat each other like dirt?

Another thing ...many nurses don't think about their personality type and match it up to the specialty. There is a clash of type A vs type B going on. Some get inpatient with the type B's in a high pressure and fast paced field.

I think about general society and try to get this into perspective. What proportion of people are racist? sexist? homophobic? ageist? snobby? Basically not very nice people.

Then I remember that even though nursing probably has more nicer people than other fields - we are still going to have our racists/snobs/jerks/ignorant

So out 100 people .... we got 8 who cause some problems and we've got 92 who don't cause much problem

So that's not too bad ....8%

Specializes in Urology, ENT.
Agree ....but most of I blame the nurses who continue to tolerate it because 'that's how women are' type of thing.

I'm going to place those types in the same sorry bunch as the 'martyr marys'; also the codependent ones ' nursing is caring and caring is me'. These types are why we suffer from an image problem.

Sure I've been bullied and treated poorly over the years by both seasoned and newer nurses.

However I try and keep perspective. I ask myself what happened. Was it a rude exchange? Was the person being a jerk? Is the person a bully? Does the person lack social skills and a sense of boundaries? Do they come from a culture where women treat each other like dirt?

Another thing ...many nurses don't think about their personality type and match it up to the specialty. There is a clash of type A vs type B going on. Some get inpatient with the type B's in a high pressure and fast paced field.

I think about general society and try to get this into perspective. What proportion of people are racist? sexist? homophobic? ageist? snobby? Basically not very nice people.

Then I remember that even though nursing probably has more nicer people than other fields - we are still going to have our racists/snobs/jerks/ignorant

So out 100 people .... we got 8 who cause some problems and we've got 92 who don't cause much problem

So that's not too bad ....8%

I hope I can get to the point where I ask myself what happened sooner. I'm still in school, but this is my second nursing school -- I refused to go back to the first school after a terrible clinical experience. Occasionally I look back and I think, "Wow I should've spoken up and not said that." I completely understand that psych study, the one where they found people were willing to obey someone they perceived to be higher than them. It's a really long story, but I ended up "admitting" to my teacher I had done something I hadn't because one of the floor nurses had said I did. Something about an isolation room and a thermometer. She wasn't coming out of an isolation room, which didn't help me because I realized it after the fact. I was already in so much trouble anyway, I think I just stopped caring.

I'm happy to say I've had overall positive clinical experiences where I am now. I've still been chewed out (rightfully so in the one instance), but not to where I've cried everyday at clinical like before. I swore when I left the first school that if I ever have a student follow me, I will never treat them the way I was treated before.

Specializes in Geriatric Assessment, management and leadership.

New and seasoned nurses alike, men and women, let's keep working on a mentoring culture in nursing and strive to guide, encourage and yes, even inspire, each other to Be the Best Nurses We Can Be!

Specializes in aged -adolescent.

Rumwynnie, don't you just have to wonder how some people sleep at night after the way they treat other staff members?. I am glad you went back to school though. It took me a couple of tries but I don't regret it.

One of the the hardest things I have ever had to do was say goodbye to one of the nastiest nurses in one department who had just about torn my heart in half. She had berated me for daring to try and work in a department where I was definitely not suited. I was so nervous when she assessed me while I was drawing up an injection I almost stabbed myself and she was enjoying every bit of it. When the time came to say goodbye to one of the nicer nurses she was speaking to my adversary as I approached.

In the end I said "Goodbye and thank you both for what you have taught me whilst I have been here" The nasty one looked rather surprised.I was angry and I hated leaving but I remained lady like and there was no way I was ever going to let anyone see me upset. Some of the staff were surprised that I was leaving. "Why don't you like it here?" I love it" I replied "but it doesn't love me". I have been upset a few times and been through hell but no-one is going to see me distressed if I can go out with dignity.

Specializes in Urology, ENT.

@greatshakes -- I hope I can get to that point! I think some nurses just don't care really so they don't have a problem sleeping at night. I've wondered what I would say if I ever came across them again, but I realize, "Yeah, it's probably not even worth it."

I was treated terribly at the u nit I worked in. I wish I left earlier. I was stubborn enough to stay and said to myself that I would ignore the gang of nurses that were terrorizing me. I worked and worked, but no matter what I did it wasnt enough. They used every little mistake against me even if they were guilty of the same thing. The management did not help either. They were all indians who worked there for more than a decade. A group of them got together and documented everything and every little thing. I was so naive ... and they ended up firing me and sent all documentations to the Board of Nursing. At this moment, I have not received word from the BNE, but I'm really afraid. I dont know what to expect. It was 2nd year of my nursing career and I'm afraid that I may not have a license. I decided to go back to school and get my masters since Im too afraid to go back to the hospital due to the dark side of nursing. It really hurts me because I love what I do, but too afraid to step foot back in the door.

Specializes in aged -adolescent.

Sparky07

Don't let them do that to you. Are you in a union? If so, get straight on to them. Document everything and any remark or action with dates (and if possible witnesses) that bears relevance to what has been said and done to you at work. I have been through it and it is nothing short of a nightmare. I still have my nursing licence but have to pay and undergo an assessment to keep it. This resulted just because I wanted to update my skills. My supervisor would not let me do an IV injection even though I was on call where I worked I had only completed my degree 8 months before that and knew precisely what to do. (Talk about being rendered

uesless in front of others). When I spoke to the nursing union yesterday they could not believe I had been through such hell. Fight back with all you have and good luck.

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

I had to learn the lesson already 10 years as a nurse! I was lucky to have great coworkers so I was very trusting --until I got targeted by a vindictive "supervisor" who would draw my peers into her little nest of nastiness.

Though I tried everything I could think of to get along-- it was a pure power trip on her part and I ended up resigning from that job. When I left the DON actually said to me on my exit interview "I have a real problem with B and S - can you please give me some honest feedback . ." Lots of nurses were leaving their unit.

She actually had a major snit because I went to the annual Christmas party at the home of one of our physicians there. She bad-mouthed me all day long to her "pet" gesturing towards me saying "that one" dared to show up at an off-site, off-hours hoiday party in someone's home! But did I tell her it was none of her damn business what I did on my own time? Nope - and it's the sort of thing that will cause your job to be a living hell.

A really good guideline about unit culture is the manager's personality - I didn't say "leader" because the leader isn't always the manager. If you have a spineless manager who allows someone else to create a power base - forget it. If you have a manager with ethics and who listens to all the employees you stand a much better chance of eventually fitting in to the environment, even if there are some bumps in the road. Bumps are natural, not feeling comfortable for a while is natural. Not allowing newcomers to ever feel comfortable is not!!

You've got to keep yourself on the lookout for the wolves! If your gut check is flashing warning signs listen to them! I wish you the best in your next job! :)

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