Do you have a living will?

[Dixielee]

I know many of you on this forum are young and may have never thought about your own demise. But, since Terri Schiavo's plight, I have given it more thought. I sent an e mail to all of my family tonight with my wishes in writing. It may not be legal but at least they all will be clear on my wishes. This is what I said in my letter. You may want to do something similar with your family so there will be no questions.

Dear Family,

I have been following the Terri Schiavo case on the

right to live or die.

I just wanted to put into writing, obviously not

legally, but to my family, that if the time comes that

I am in that situation, would someone please have the

decency, common sense and love to put a pillow over my

head, a bullet thru my skull, or give me a healthy

overdose of a narcotic!

If I am in an accident, have a big stroke, etc. let

the medical folks give it their best shot, try

therapy, etc. but if it becomes clear that the best I

can hope for is a nursing home where I drool on myself

and poop in my diaper, please, for God's sake, put me

out of my misery.

We had to put a wonderful dog to sleep just before

Christmas and it was one of the hardest things I have

ever had to do, it still brings tears to my eyes when

I think of it. But I know it was the only humane thing

to do and because I loved him and did not want him to

suffer, we made the decision to do it. It was peaceful

and mercifully quick. Ken and I were holding him,

stroking his fur and telling him how much we loved him

as he went to a better place. I hope someone can have

the courage to do the same for me if the time ever

comes when I can't make the decision my self.

I am completely comfortable with my salvation and my

place in the here after. I love life on this earth and

I look forward to watching my grandchildren grow up

and my children grow old, but I am not afraid of

death. I am however afraid of what they can do to you

in the dying process.

I hope and pray that none of us ever have to make such

a painful decision, but think about it now while you

are healthy, and let those who love you know how you

feel. Don't make any of us get dragged thru the courts

like poor Terri is.

Copy this e mail and save it if you need to. I will

make a living will as soon as I can, but this is just

a casual heads up on my thoughts.

Love, your wife, your mother, your sister and your

daughter, Barbara

[Kyriaka]

I have had a living will for years.

However, mine does say that I do not consider a feeding tube to be heroic and that I am to remain on a feeding tube as long as there is someone who wishes to take on that responsibility.

I know exactly what I want because I am a former coma patient. I have been on a feeding tube. I have been on a vent. My parents were put under a great deal of pressure to turn the vent off in my case.

I just want to add, that when I did my living will I had to have 2 witnesses (written) to my decision and NEITHER of these people could be beneficiaries of my estate (husband automatically is disqualified).

[Kyriaka]

Steph,

I did find it intersting that you cannot be pregnant in AL and do a living will.

[Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN]

Steph,

I did find it intersting that you cannot be pregnant in AL and do a living will.

Hmmm. . . I had to read that a couple of times. Maybe because while you are pregnant, there are two lives to consider?

Interesting indeed.

steph

[CHATSDALE]

please note this case when you come in contact with eating disorder sufferers, be they firends family coworkers patients...this is gives the 'dying to be thin' syndrome a new horror

[goodknight]

I have one and I'm only 18. I think as soon as you turn 18 you should be required to fill one out. It shocks alot of people that I have one. Why not? Young people have bad stuff happen to them too.

I know I don't want to be in a vegetable garden if something should happen to me, and have very strong feelings about end of life care. My parents and grandparents also all have one, so everyone knows what to do if something should happen to any of us.

[dbsn00]

I had my living will done about 6 months after I started to work in LTC & made my husband do one too. For me, it's about quality of life.

[rjflyn, ASN, RN]

This comment raises an interesting question. An eating disorder is a mental health condition. Hence if one is undergoing treatment for such a conditon one could extrapolate that any living will written to exclude the use of a feeding tube might not be valid.

I will admit too I have been lax in putting my wishes in writting. I however have made my wishes known to my family as they have to me. I really do need to get it written down.

To take this one step further I actually learned something about living wills the other day. I was admitting a patient to the hospital from the ED. The admit team nurse was going over the paper work with patient as we were waiting on a bed. She came to me to witness this patients living will- at this hospital we are allowed to do this- infact we have a generic form. SHe made multiple copies and reminded the patient to give them to the usual people one would think of. But heres the one most forget- put one in your car with your insurance and registation information where one is most likely to occur a case of need for such document. Heard one time that everyone in their live time will be involved in a car crash, of those 1 in 10 leads to serious life threatening injuries.

RJ

please note this case when you come in contact with eating disorder sufferers, be they firends family coworkers patients...this is gives the 'dying to be thin' syndrome a new horror

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

I'm young (24 years of age) and have not written a living will. I need to do this. I own property. Also, my wishes need to be known without a morsel of confusion.

I would not want to live in a vegetative state. Pull the damn plug on me! I would not want my family to keep me alive for their own purposes.

[WickedRedRN, BSN, RN]

Excellent thread!!

Husband and I are both 37, we have a 4yo daughter. Last year we met with a lawyer to set up a will just so we have it set in writing who would have guardianship of our daughter in case anything happens to us. (there are family issues on both sides, so we felt it was important to make sure we know where she would go) While we were there, we both did our living wills. It was a bit of an eye opener to know what each other would/wld not want done. Thankfully we did this and were able to discuss our feelings on the issues.

I think my living will and will are gifts to my husband, and vice versa. He and I both sleep better knowing we have set these up and when the time comes neither one of us will have to struggle or agonize over decisions. I will uphold and defend his wishes knowing I would be doing the right thing.

[UnewmeB4]

I have seen many...way too many living wills disreguarded due to families taking over. I have seen many people shocked that everything will be done(short of cpr) when a loved one has a living will. I always explain that the living will means..."if I am found to be in a terminal state". Quite honestly, most Drs. here treat...and treat...and treat...unless, they are literally dying. Even then, they send them to ICU, put them on dialysis, and assorted drips.

I always tell them if they do NOT want rescusitated, they MUST GET THJE DR TO WRITE IT AS AN ORDER ON THEIR CHART!

I am shocked at the number of nurses without a living will. Just find a darn good POA for health care decisions who will speak for you. I do have a living will. I will allow 2 weeks on the vent. No peg tube. My daughter, who works on the Respiratory floor, will indeed abide by my wishes. She will graduate from Nursing school in May, and having spent the last 3 years on the Resp floor, she has seen the horrendous consequences of not having someone demand your living will is followed. Besides, if I am die, I won't know it!