Do you experience jealousy from friends/family members?

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To any RN/LPNs do you experience jealousy from friends/family members or even co-workers over the fact that you actually accomplished a diploma/ADN/Bachelors Degree or higher in nursing? If so, what do they say and how do you react to it?

Boy, am I glad someone started this thread! I was beginning to think I was the only one who had this problem with family and deep seeded jelousy. I'm glad we are here to support each other. It is sad, very sad. Yes, I have cried about it. It takes courage sometimes to share, but I'm glad you came forward because I was beginning to think I was the only one. I could write volumes on my experience with my family and their bitter jelousy towards nurses and just people with education in general. I am from a rather humble background. I worked my hind end off to put myself through nursing school (as a single mother with a toddler child) and have chosen a career path which has allowed me to give a little something back to mankind and just happens to provide my family with a 6 figure annual income. Not sorry, it's just what the industry pays well qualified trained nurses.

My earliest memory of family and nursing was in the late 1970's when my cousin graduated from high school. She worked as a CNA in a local county nursing home. She was a hard worker and awarded a nursing scholarship at a local community college. She didn't complete her first quarter and dropped out. Nobody talked about why, I was by far to young to understand Several years later when I was preparing to graduate from nursing school in the mid 1990's she exclaimed at a family function that "RN's were just"glorified a$$ wipers." I sensitive person, I was floored. I was just thrilled to have complete coursework in a profession I was truely passionate about. Her comment left me speechless but set the ground work for more family antics. The more I interject, the worse it got. Needless to say, I am not allowed to discuss my career goals, my profession, my educational aspirations, at any family function. I am forced to hear about everyone elses kids, their grand kids who are going to nursing school and how their educational system , which by design are to create safe nurses, is failing them, their spouses in nursing school, with the same issues etc. yadayadayada. I suppose it's because I'm a good listener.

On my shirt tales my brother's wife who was hired as a CNA, worked on a specialty unit of a LTC center and had to have him table discussion at family functions "you know, the people who are running the LTC facilitiy units shouldn't be RN's, they should be CNA's becuase they really don't do anything." She later entered the RN program and didn't progress past the LPN level because she couldn't make the grade to get to the next level. Because my parents like to rescue the weak ones I suppose the have placed her on some kind of pedistal to the point, all I hear about is my brother and my folks bragging about some trumped up promotions she has recieved at work as a new grad. I also heard from my brother about the things I don't need to hear about such as the her first night as a new grad being left alone on the floor when a hospice pt. died and they paged hospice RN on call and she didn't respond. He knew that the hospice agency covering the pt was the agency I worked for and shared it with my family Oh, and the tone he uses---so negative, when the RN is at fault it's the "RRRRRRNNNNNN" Ya' don't think there was a little confidentiality issue with the (do I spell it out phenetically) ELLL PEEE ONNN. Just for the record, I don't diss on LPN's cuz I really love you guys; just say it that way cuz I'm immitating my brother.

I have been an "RRRRRRRNNNNNNNN" as my brother would say for 15 years and proud of the profession I have chosen. I don't hang with my family because the above never changes at family functions; it's done so unkindly and it hurts. My husband, friends and coworkers get it and see me in a much different light and appreciate the contribution I give to others without making such an ordeal about it and I don't have to go on and on about how many lives I saved in one day. I know this is a lengthy post-however, there is a time to get it off your chest. To the OP and those with similar experiences, UUUUUGGG! I GET IT!!!

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I have a few old friends that just can't except the fact I will be a nurse. I had one get so jealous she just went balistic on me. I have another that seems to be jealous by just wanting me to look bad to everyone and discredit me. She brought her cousin to a short notice get together she had invited me too and they wanted to know all about the program. I told her how hard it was and she seemed like I had burst her bubble and was kind of mad about it. I found out later she has not taken one prereq yet! My Gosh, wants to know all about the program and has done nothing about it. She says, I have known you for 2 years and u have not graduated yet? I cannot believe it, what in the world has she been doing for those same two years?

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I'm lucky because my parents think that having a daughter that is a nurse is a great thing. That's the first thing they'll say when they introduce me to someone. When I got into a big name grad program it became "This is my daughter, the nurse, and she's going to big name grad program." They love to throw in the various certifications too. I'm pretty sure their friends are sick of hearing about it but it's really sweet how much they supported my dreams to be a nurse and my desire to continue my education. When I tell my dad that my day sucked his response is always "Did you learn something?" which always seems to make me feel better. I'm pretty blessed. I do have some really snobby relatives whose children went to xyz fancy undergraduate school and it was pretty darn nice to tell them I'm at a big name school and watch them all shut up. As I've gotten to do more at work too and been recognized that gives that seems to stop some of their comments. I'll never understand why people feel the need to really put others down to feel smart. If you're smart that should be enough. Sorry for the rant!

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Specializes in Psych ICU, addictions.

Jealousy, no.

Sympathy, yes, especially when they hear about my more interesting days at work.

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I do from some not from my immediate family members but from some of my friends since they are still in nursing school and would like to get a feel of the real world of nursing!!

PS.BTW one of my friend sounds really jealous,she knows I was let go from my first nursing job and when I told her that I'm still applying to other hospitals she made a catty comment "You will make the same mistakes and they will let you go again" I cannot believe how catty some people are!!!

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OMG! I know so much jealousy and I am not even a nurse yet. I live with my BF and people just try their best to put me down. First of all, I am always getting phone calls from my sister (she's not jealous) to tell me that she has heard around town that I am jobless and homeless and is not going to school. Nope! I live in a beautiful 2 bedroom appartment with my BF, and I have a decent job that pays health insurance. My X bestfriend graduated highschool 2 years ago to become a nurse and she still has not been accepted to nursing school. I am one year into my pre-req's and I have been pre-approved pending the last two classes that I need. People always judge me for moving out of my parents home unmarried (I come from a very religious family) yet, God has blessed me to maintain mostly A's and a B, going to school full time while working full time. I will be attending Nursing school in the winter and I just cannot wait to show them everything that I have done. After graduating and getting a job, I plan to become a CRNA! Now there's something for everyone to talk about.

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I've nicknamed my mother the misery monger. She is angry that I became a nurse, is angry that I am wasting my time on the BSN - meh. I call as duty requires and let it roll off my back.

I do find some jealousy among the LPNs. There is understandable resentment that they have been there 20 years and are being supervised by me, a relative newcomer. But hey, go back to school and get the credentials. It isn't about fait, it's about licensure.

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NOCnewbie, thank you! you actually made me laugh. i am a 53 yr. old male nurse with 10 months experience in LTC. just got my RN in 04/2010. can't get a job due to "no experience" extremely depressed. long story to tell but have to go to sleep so i can get up & be depressed again tomorrow.but you made me laugh and i thank you for that!!!!!

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I used to get it from the only person that mattered, my Mom. To her, my sister in law was the ultimate. After all, she was the one who graduated from college and became someone important with further forays into the world of academia. I was the failure. But she never talked about the fact that SIL went for a counseling career because she did not get into nursing school. Today, Mom isn't with us, and I still haven't graduated from nursing school, but I did become a nurse 20 years ago, even if it wasn't the right kind of nurse to make the family proud. I don't really care about it. I will reach my own goals if and when I want to.

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I've nicknamed my mother the misery monger. She is angry that I became a nurse, is angry that I am wasting my time on the BSN - meh. I call as duty requires and let it roll off my back.

I do find some jealousy among the LPNs. There is understandable resentment that they have been there 20 years and are being supervised by me, a relative newcomer. But hey, go back to school and get the credentials. It isn't about fait, it's about licensure.

You are so right. However,those same people you meet on the way up,you meet on the way down.

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Specializes in ER, ICU, Education.
I've got a Grad Dip, two Masters and am part-way through a PhD. My friends, family and colleagues are supportive happy that I enjoy further education; I can't say I've encountered anything approaching jealousy. Most of my colleagues also think I'm nuts, but I don't think that's the emotion you mean!

Hahaha!!! I am in the exact same position, and my family is also supportive although they do tease me about "burning degrees if I need to keep warm in the winter".

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Specializes in Operating Room.

From immediate family, no jealousy, just pride. My parents think it's great..my Dad says that he doesn't have to worry about me money wise. I had a relative say that I was "bringing in the big bucks" because I was an RN, but he didn't say it mean..I let that roll of me.

No, I get grief from the tech I work with. Lately, it's been really bad. She'll say snide things about OR nurses, that our job is easy etc. I did her job for seven years and I can say that there is far less stress involved in scrubbing. I've been trying to let this roll off me but it's been getting to me. Thus far, I've bitten my tongue, but I can see a confrontation coming soon.

A few snide comments from old acquaintences but since these people have degrees and are still bagging groceries etc, I've let those go.:D

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