I've got a couple of burrs under my saddle blanket and am requesting feedback from the allnurses community regarding professional behaviors:
I believe:
Someone should be referred to with their title of Ms, Mrs, Mr, Dr, etc. and their surname until permission is granted otherwise.
Profanity in professional situations is rarely acceptable and if so used, should be in consensual agreement, e.g. "May I speak frankly?"
It gets my goat how some believe they have the freedom to address another or use language that is not becoming to a professional relationship.
My wife, medical nurse Belinda, told me that at Anomaly Memorial Hospital the staff are encouraged to refer to the patients by their first names because it comes across as being more friendly.
In reading some articles on the internet, profanity is condoned and supported in some professional situations because it "releases tension".
"Bullhockey!" say I.
In my experiences, respect is received, even with Salt-of-the-Earth Psychotics, by giving them respect. And that respect, reinforced, has prevented escalating patients from experiencing total meltdowns: The statement, "I expect you to give me the same respect I give you" has caused many an angry patient to take pause.
I think of the multitude of smiles I've received, asking a patient, "May I call you...?" Or: "What would you like to be called?"
Profanity is rarely necessary in a professional situation. The use of profanity can be a sign of loss of control, or apathy. I hear profanity from an acquaintance as their way of saying, "I can say whatever I want with no regard to you".
I truly enjoy using euphemisms to say the vilest thing in the sweetest, most respectful way. Forms of the word "imprudent" has become one of my favs as of late: "You can't fix imprudence" sounds so much more respectful than the mainstream saying. Or: "How imprudent of administration to do that!"
Euphemisms help to take the focus of how something is said and puts the focus on what is said.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Rita sent me an email at 4pm:
"Good afternoon Dave. Without discussion on your assertions, am I to accept this as your resignation?"
And I responded:
No. Please read what I wrote:
" This notice is to inform you that I will be accepting no further work assignments until my concerns are validated and addressed and I am reasonably sure that I will be respectfully treated while working in a safe, non hostile environment where established laws, codes, guidelines, policies and procedures are enforced."
I bolded the important part for the hard of understanding.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
20 minutes ago, Daisy4RN said:
Rita's response makes me sad. They are attempting to weasel out!
Thank you for that perspective, Daisy: Ms. Weasle is trying to weasel out!
I need some time to mull this response over. The HR director contacts me for a meeting to hear my concerns. She then cancels the meeting due to other matters requiring attention, indicates she is not prepared, and says we will meet at some arbitrary time "next week". A full week goes by without any contact, so I give her my stipulation: Give me what is owed (to me or any other employee), or I will accept no further work assignments.
She responds to my stipulation, perhaps, as an ultimatum; a final notice. Regardlessly, every employee should be "respectfully treated while working in a safe, non hostile environment where established laws, codes, guidelines, policies and procedures are enforced."
I don't get it. The only word that comes to mind is the non euphemism for imprudent.
So you're saying, Daisy, is that Rita is saying that I'm attempting to send a letter of resignation so she won't have to deal with me?
Pretty cunning. Not clever, but cunning.
Stay tuned. We'll be right back after this commercial message.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
2 minutes ago, Davey Do said:
says we will meet at some arbitrary time "next week". A full week goes by
I had the email to Rita and the fax to Mia all prepared Tuesday night. Like a kid wanting to open his present as soon as it's placed underneath the Christmas tree, I wanted to send the email and fax. The little voice inside my head said, "Sleep on it".
I did sleep on it and came up with Thursday morning being the choicest time. It would be exactly one week since our last communication and it would give scheduling two full days to fill the void my absence made.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
14 hours ago, Davey Do said:
Rita sent me an email at 4pm:
"Good afternoon Dave. Without discussion on your assertions, am I to accept this as your resignation?"
I'm working on a response or an assertion, I don't know which yet:
Ms. Weasle:
Please allow me to clarify the portion of my notice which states"I will be accepting no further work assignments until my concerns are validated and addressed andI am reasonably sure that I will be respectfully treated while working a safe, non hostile environment where established laws, codes, guidelines, policies and procedures are enforced."
In order for one to be "reasonably sure", it would be objectively ascertained that the criteria is met.
I am not reasonably sure that concerns involving my safety and respect, or infractions of WRMC's policies & procedures, employee handbook and code of conduct manual, including Illinois mental health laws, statutes and codes have been validated and/or addressed.
Two month old cursory email responses and a recent meeting cancelled with an arbitrary future date of "next week", all without appropriately accordingly following up, overtly conveys a sense of apathy toward rectifying these these concerns.
'I do not wish to end my employment at this time. I am hopeful that the current situation can be rectified as I would like to continue my employment at Wrongway..'.
This way it is documented and makes it harder for them to weasel out
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Just now, Daisy4RN said:
Sounds good..
I would also add something like...
'I do not wish to end my employment at this time. I am hopeful that the current situation can be rectified as I would like to continue my employment at Wrongway..'.
This way it is documented and makes it harder for them to weasel out
Thanks for the advice, Daisy. But I'd be lying, according to my feelings at this time, if I said "I would like to continue my employment", because I don't.
I do not believe that I can, or will ever, be "reasonably sure that I will be respectfully treated while working a safe, non hostile environment where established laws, codes, guidelines, policies and procedures are enforced". And if I can't feel safe, I do not want to work at Wrongway.
I'm merely calling them to task, and believe, that in the end they will be unable to meet criteria, as they have proven in the past.
I wish to convey to you, Daisy, my appreciation for your perspective and opinion. Without feedback from substantial persons such as yourself, I may not have been allowed to see things from a different view and kept a parochial perspective.
You, m'lady, have broaden my horizons and expanded my introspect.
I wish I could have some words of wisdom. I applaud your efforts for ensuring a safe work environment. Especially in times like these today, staff are stressed and there is a basic need for feeling safe on the units we work in.
I am getting the sense that Rita and Mr. Weasel are hoping that you forget or that you are going to let it go. For some reason they are valuing an employee who does not create a safe and non-hostile work environment.
If I think of anything more, I will add it in. At some point we, the collective we, as employees have to stand up and speak out for safe work environments. We should feel safe. Kudos for you for speaking up.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
33 minutes ago, RNNPICU said:
I am getting the sense that Rita and Mr. Weasel are hoping that you forget or that you are going to let it go.
Point of clarification, since it must be difficult to follow all the characters in this drama: The HR director's name is Ms. Rita Weasle. And I always love it when posters put immediately after: (not their real name)!
However, the premise of your statement, RNNPICU, is well founded. I do concur that "Rita... (is) hoping that (I am) going to let it go".
Case in point: Three years ago, March 2017, I filed a grievance against the then-director, Amy Ministrator, for harassment. My grievance began at a meeting with Rita and Amy when I was called down to HR to be written up for not completing a superfluous piece of paperwork. I charged Amy with ignoring complaints of patient abuse and possible medicare fraud...
I have a cartoon of that. Please allow me to find it...
To make a really long story short, basically Rita said, "I can't do it this week- how about next week?"
I attended a face to face "fact finding" meeting with Rita the following week, and then...
nothing.
I did not pursue the matter because I was never again harassed by Amy.
Currently, Rita is dealing with this matter according to her modus operandi by not following through accordingly in a competent, time efficient manner.
This is a card I have up my sleeve and will use it PRN.
Thanks for the advice, Daisy. But I'd be lying, according to my feelings at this time, if I said "I would like to continue my employment", because I don't.
I do not believe that I can, or will ever, be "reasonably sure that I will be respectfully treated while working a safe, non hostile environment where established laws, codes, guidelines, policies and procedures are enforced". And if I can't feel safe, I do not want to work at Wrongway.
Well, in that case Happy Retirement! (I know that you have already discussed this with your SO but just make sure the decision isn't totally based of feelings)
1 hour ago, Davey Do said:
I'm merely calling them to task, and believe, that in the end they will be unable to meet criteria, as they have proven in the past.
Well, by then next moon you should know!
1 hour ago, Davey Do said:
I wish to convey to you, Daisy, my appreciation for your perspective and opinion. Without feedback from substantial persons such as yourself, I may not have been allowed to see things from a different view and kept a parochial perspective.
You, m'lady, have broaden my horizons and expanded my introspect.
Thank you.
Thank thee m'lord. And same to you, you have great insights, not just this post but others as well; If you do retire I hope you don't disappear from this site!!
I am getting the sense that Rita and Mr. Weasel are hoping that you forget or that you are going to let it go. For some reason they are valuing an employee who does not create a safe and non-hostile work environment.
Unfortunately I have seen this way too many times. Not only with trouble makers but lazy employees also!
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
I have made the premise that Clark gave erroneous legal advice when he said, "Anybody can start or stop a restraint". I have already proven the premise by citing laws, statutes, codes, policy & procedure.
Jason Hiney RN made the wicket more sticky when he said something along the lines of, "If staff follow Clark's erroneous interpretation of the law, it could open Wrongway up to a lawsuit".
Jason theorized a patient being let out of restraints without the RNs assessment, causing an incident up to a sentinel event, and Wrongway being sued as a result.
Jason also made mention that if the CPI inservice was indeed in error, staff would be required to retake the training.
"Thanks, Dave!" Jason said.
Let's take a look at the session I attended:
Attending were five RNs, one LPN, and a Rec Therapy Aid totalling seven staff members. This session is not a true representation of a typical one, since there were no Techs present, but for the sake of an argument, let's just say that it is.
There were six training sessions with about seven staff members attending each session. That means forty two staff members were informed of an erroneous legal process.
According to other staff members, Clark made the same statement in other sessions and received arguments from other RNs. I also heard he freely used profanities.
This example gives another reason as to why I feel that Wrongway is not a safe environment.
Davey Do
10,666 Posts
Rita sent me an email at 4pm:
"Good afternoon Dave. Without discussion on your assertions, am I to accept this as your resignation?"
And I responded:
No. Please read what I wrote:
" This notice is to inform you that I will be accepting no further work assignments until my concerns are validated and addressed and I am reasonably sure that I will be respectfully treated while working in a safe, non hostile environment where established laws, codes, guidelines, policies and procedures are enforced."
I bolded the important part for the hard of understanding.