Difference between a graduate nurse & a experienced nurse

Nurses Humor

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the don where i work send this to me via e-mail, wanted to share...

differences...

a graduate nurse throws up when the patient does.

an experienced nurse calls housekeeping when a patient throws up

a graduate nurse wears so many pins on their name badge you can't read it.

an experienced nurse doesn't wear a name badge for liability reasons

a graduate nurse charts too much.

an experienced nurse doesn't chart enough.

a graduate nurse loves to run to codes.

an experienced nurse makes graduate nurses run to codes.

a graduate nurse wants everyone to know they are a nurse.

an experienced nurse doesn't want anyone to know they are a nurse.

a graduate nurse keeps detailed notes on a pad.

an experienced nurse writes on the back of their hand, paper scraps, napkins, etc.

a graduate nurse will spend all day trying to reorient a patient.

an experienced nurse will chart the patient is disoriented and restrain them.

a graduate nurse can hear a beeping i-med at 50 yards.

an experienced nurse can't hear any alarms at any distance.

a graduate nurse loves to hear abnormal heart and breath sounds.

an experienced nurse doesn't want to know about them unless the patient is symptomatic.

a graduate nurse spends 2 hours giving a patient a bath.

an experienced nurse lets the cna give the patient a bath.

a graduate nurse thinks people respect nurses.

an experienced nurse knows everybody blames everything on the nurse.

a graduate nurse looks for blood on a bandage hoping they will get to change it.

an experienced nurse knows a little blood never hurt anybody.

a graduate nurse looks for a chance "to work with the family."

an experienced nurse avoids the family.

a graduate nurse expects meds and supplies to be delivered on time.

an experienced nurse expects them to never be delivered at all.

a graduate nurse will spend days bladder training an incontinent patient.

an experienced nurse will insert a foley catheter.

a graduate nurse always answers their phone.

an experienced nurse checks their caller id before answering the phone.

a graduate nurse thinks psych patients are interesting.

an experienced nurse thinks psych patients are crazy.

a graduate nurse carries reference books in their bag.

an experienced nurse carries magazines, lunch, and some "cough syrup" in their bag.

a graduate nurse doesn't find this funny.

an experienced nurse does.

life tips.

I find this hilarious.

Specializes in ER.

Some of you guys need to lighten up! Taking this seriously will cause you to stroke out. I thought it was hysterical! I could see myself in both situations (i.e. I can still remember when I was a new grad), and I think it is on target! To quote my hero, Foghorn Leghorn, "it's a joke son, it's a joke"! :yeah:

Thanks for the chuckle!

Specializes in PACU, pre/postoperative, ortho.

Thought this was great & fits my sense of humor to a T! Put it on my FB to share with my fellow grads who all loved it too. Had one comment though from my husband's cousin who totally missed the boat, stating how she "won't be that kind of graduate nurse" & will "be giving 110% just like the experienced nurse". ?!?!?! She's not even in NS, but just started taking classes for med asst? :nono:

i'm an experienced nurse, and i don't find it funny.

i find it hilarious!

young lady - you scared me! then i scrolled down. whew . . . . :D

Specializes in Pedi.
An experienced nurse doesn't chart enough.

An experienced nurse will chart the patient is disoriented and restrain them.

An experienced nurse can't hear any alarms at any distance.

An experienced nurse doesn't want to know about them unless the patient is symptomatic.

An experienced nurse avoids the family.

An experienced nurse will insert a Foley catheter.

An experienced nurse does.

these are funny? Kind of concerning if you ask me.

Yes they are funny and you need to relax, this is a joke and is meant to be funny! When you're an experienced nurse, you'll get it.

Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

my husband was discharged following several weeks of inpatient wound care rehab. he was sent home with several rolls of gauze, a package of 4's, and his other meds. he had been told by the sweet young thing who

dx him that "the rest" of his supplies would arrive no later than tuesday noon. (this was saturday.)

want to bet??!!

thursday evening, a box of supplies were delivered -- no 4's but 100 rolls of gauze!

we had already stocked up on supplies at our local drugstore on sunday. just in case... and my husband had

the nerve to laugh at me!

when i was a psych nurse, i was always covered with ink because i made myself into a human notepad.

i used to love to watch new nurses try to reorient one particular patient. he was woodrow wilson preparing

to attend the peace talks after wwi ended and that was that. no amount of sweet reason could change his

mind.

good thread!

It's the truth. Reading this makes me not want to work as a GN. I just graduated and I do not want the snarls of the experienced nurses lol. I'm quite afraid to start a job ... and be the newbie ... and young. I'll guess I'll have to learn to wear a shield.

:bowingpur

Oh, don't worry. You're your own worst critic. I had wonderfully supportive experienced co-workers when I was new, and you might find that your experience is the same. Most of us remember what it was like to be new.

Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.

i would like to thank to all who was involved in this tread, and remind everyone that it was meant as a joke for this reason alone it was placed in the nursing humor/ share jokes section. in addition, to remind all of the new grads. that one day in the near future you too will be experienced nurses if you continue your career in nursing, you shall be able to look back and say " i remember when" and laugh about it. needless to say, even the most seasoned nurses feel apprehensive in areas where they haven't been exposed to however, we learned to make the best of it, and at least test the waters and move on. lastly, oscar wilde once said and i quote " experience is the result of mistakes"

I think most of us can filter out the hyperbole--not charting enough, ignoring obvious emergencies, restraining patients improperly, bringing "cough syrup" to work, etc,--and see that this is more about a change in mindset than in actual practices. Ideally, hypervigilance and mild hysteria grow into confident capability. And people find ways to cover all the bases without driving themselves (and everyone around them) insane with focusing on details to the exclusion of the big picture.

It feels good to walk into work knowing you have a handle on the basics and even most of the exceptions. For a few nurses that might breed a haphazard approach, but for most of us, I think it just means we've ditched the panic and opted instead for the balance and common sense that a bit of experience brings.

I would only go back to my early days in nursing if I could take all I've learned in the past couple of decades with me. :nurse:

Specializes in Ortho Med\Surg.

As a new nurse, I don't like this....

I freakin' LOVE IT!!!

Wow, I needed that laugh, thanks Gitano! :hug:

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