Desensitized already?

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · May 29, 2014

That is not a character flaw, that is an emotionally healthy reaction.

You are providing a professional service to patients, you are not emotionally invested in them.

It would be a PROBLEM if you cried every time a patient passed.

ant2506 · May 30, 2014

I agree that it would be a problem if you cried every time. We have been trained from day 1 to go through our job with a "matter of fact face" so that we do not offend or cause more distress for the people we care for. Death is the ultimate goal for many people all over the world, as a Christian (who was agnostic until nursing school opened my eyes) I will get to paradise one day. Also a newbie nurse of one year, I question some of my views on people that have changed drastically. In pediatrics, I work on the opposite age range, but with patients having many similarities and need based care. I have only lost one patient, so I have not been as exposed to as many deaths but I hope I can take death in the same way. What upsets me more is neglect. I do not call DFCS on every bruise or scratch, because kids are kids. To hear a child in respiratory distress that smells like he/she smoked a pack of cigarettes on the way to the office, well that bothers me. Or a child with impetigo or scabies covering most of there body with a parent that says, " its only been there since last night". My personal favorite is the parent or grandparent that refuses immunizations because of distorted information. What will they do if that child is infected by one of these preventable diseases. Death is a posibility but some can drastically effect quality of life (polio, Hepatitis B). Children and the residents of LTC rely upon somebody to take care of them. I can say that the only thing that has made me truly break down has been neglect, what's worse, its been the patients with insurance/Medicaid in the worse shape. The parents come in talking on the newest smartphone, more concerned about themselves than the life they created. What makes it worth it is to be in Walmart and almost get tackeled by the kid you gave 6 shots the day before. I'm sure the people in your LTC make you feel that way daily as well. If you were an ice queen, you would not be worried that you have become desensitized.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Jun 13, 2014

I don't cry when patients pass away. I prefer to maintain a professional and emotional distance from patients and their families.

I save my range of emotions for the few people who are in my personal life.

It is hard for me to form emotional bonds with other people other than my family and a few close friends.

I'm the same way. Some people easily form emotional connections with others, whereas I've never been able to emotionally bond quickly. Then again, my psyche is hypervigilant due to past traumas.

amberella123 · Jun 13, 2014

Agree with the others. In this profession you will have many, many deaths. It would destroy you if you cried every time. It would destroy your mind and body if you got that emotionally invested in everyone. It doesn't mean you didn't care or love that person. You have to keep going on to be able to care for more people.

Fiona59 · Jun 13, 2014

In two decades of nursing I've only cried when two patients died.

Am I cold and heartless? No, I just think I'm a professional. Their families need support not to be passing me the Kleenex.

shan409, ASN, BSN, LPN, RN · Jun 13, 2014

I am starting my nursing program in the fall, but I have worked in LTC as an activities assistant and social work tech. for about 3 years. Of course you get attached to your residents, but in the event of their death, you must be strong for their family members.