dating at work?

Nurses Men

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Hey guys, just wondering what you think about dating a co-worker? I started talking to a cute aide a couple months ago. She is single and has a couple kids (one of them is handicapped), while I'm divorced with no kids. I am a few years older than her too. Anyway, it took some help from another aide to get some info as I did'nt want to just ask her out at work if she was'nt interested. I just found out she would go out with me if I asked her. Now for the problem. I happened to leaf through the policy book and there is a section stating dating among co-workers is grounds for termination. Its a small private company and people talk. But do you think they really go by this rule or is it more to protect their behind in case something happens like sexual harassment or something. Personally I don't think it would be a problem since we work different shifts. Maybe if I call her and if we agree to keep it out of the workplace? I can't afford to lose this job right now so I want to be careful, but there just does'nt seem to be any decent places to meet women in my small town. What do you guys think, call or no call?

Take along two or three 2L jugs of soda if you don't cook. And you don't have to dance to go there. Just mingle, smile at the ladies and carry on conversations. At least you will have some pleasant company for awhile and if nothing spectacular happens, well, do like I do, enjoy the food!

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Yeah, sounds like a plan. But at least my sister will be there and she could introduce me to some of the ladies. She did say there were more women than men there, although a lot of them may be a little older than me. I do like to eat too. Its about an hour drive though and starts at 5p and I don't usually get up until 4 or 5 as I work 3rd. I guess you don't have to get there right when it starts. I'm not sure about the 2L's though. Any other ideas? I do have to get groceries tonight.

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I've gone to functions where people brought stuff that they bought at the supermarket deli. They don't even bother to change the container. That is an idea. And if you don't use your own container, you don't have to worry about losing it. Probably a good thing not to be one of the first to arrive. That can be a little more awkward. Can you arrange to go with your sister for backup?

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Well I just got back from the potluck/dace. Not quite what I expected. The people seemed nice enough, but there were only a couple ladies out of about 100 people that I would consider attractive there. To be fair most were older than 50 and a couple of them seemed to be hitting on me, but I want to at least stay around my age or a little younger. I did get a chance to slow dance with one of the attractive ladies, but she did'nt seem interested (I did feel a little rusty at it though) and the other one (who was probably the hottest one there IMO) turned me down when I asked her. She said she does'nt like to slow dance. She did come over and introduce herself though, but she did a lot of the fast dancing and I just can't make myself do it as I have never tried and I'm pushing 40. They did do some of that line dancing which I could do about 10 years ago, but have'nt got a clue without lessons now. I don't know if I'll go back or not. The opening sermon kind of ruined it (for me at least) as the subject had to be about how lusting after and having sex outside of marriage is a sin. I mean come on, I know its a christian gathering, but its also a singles dance. I could maybe go along with the no sex until a marriage promise at least, but how do they expect people to date or even ask somebody out if there is'nt at least a little attraction there. Hope I'm not sounding like a typical male just after one thing as I'm not, just looking for a lady to share my life with and sex is part of that right?

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there are plenty more females out there your age... i'd recommend taking up a hobby....joining a sport league (bowling, softball, etc) do something you enjoy...you never know who you might meet just by putting yourself out there

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Agreed, but what kind of hobby if you don't really have any interests? I like sports cars, watching movies, surfing the net, body building, and I like animals. I guess those are'nt really good hobbies to meet ladies. Sure some women go to the gym, but I concentrate on the weights (lift heavy, get done and get out of there). Maybe I should start doing some cardio so I can at least jump on a machine next to a woman and start up a convo. Like I said I did the line dancing back in the day and did meet one girl I went out with for awhile, but country dancing is not in anymore.

Most of my time is spent at work anyway (12 hour shifts with mostly women). But with the rules about dating co-workers these days you have to be careful with that. Also since I work the night shift, I usually sleep until the early evening. I don't know I guess it was'nt that bad tonight, maybe I should try it at least one more time when they have another one in a couple weeks. I might also start looking for more singles dances as I'm sure there has to be more of them and probably closer to my area too. At least I know I can now approach women a lot easier than I used to be able to. Now I just need to work on what to say after the initial "where you from or what do you do" conversation starters.

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you like animals...how about volunteering? guess what...females like animals too :) As for the conversation...it goes a lot smoother if you are actually interested in what she has to say (when interested, people tend to ask questions). As for the mixer, consider it practice in meeting women...it won't kill you to practice with some of the older women... :)

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I know what your saying about the conversation. I tried to ask some questions and then hope the lady will ask me some, but the ladies tonight did'nt seem to ask many so I assumed they were'nt interested. I don't talk a lot so questions do seem to help, but I don't want to ask too many as I hate it when somebody is bugging you by keeping at it too long and I don't want to be like that. As for the mixer, I was hesitant at first but tried it and it was'nt that bad. btw, my sister's friend (who is at least 15 years older than me) did ask me to dance once and I did and it went okay. Like you said MomBSN, nothing wrong with that and it is good practice.

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Does your nursing school have an alumni organization, or is there a professional organization in your specialty that has "live" meetings in your area? Those would be opportunities to meet women who understand the peculiarities of being a nurse, but aren't coworkers. Do you have a local Barnes & Noble or other bookstore/coffeehouse nearby where you could hang out on a free evening and possibly meet people? Is a book club a possibility? Or more "female-friendly" areas of the gym, as you mentioned? Are you interested in any local political organizations? Do you belong to a church? Even if you're not particularly religious, they are a good, comparatively safe :) place to meet people, and you wouldn't have to formally join or make any kind of official proclamation/commitment, just participate in the parts that appeal to you (there are plenty of other churches out there besides your sister's, and many of them have adult singles' groups and activities).

Best wishes!

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Out of those ideas, only the church thing might be a possibility. Although there is a coffee house close by too. The problem with the church thing is I could only go certain days of the week in the evening. I'm not sure where and when the dances would be at either.

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i think medsport and elkpark should hook up, hehe.

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why do you say that dude?

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