Published Mar 16, 2008
justme1972
2,441 Posts
When you have a teenager that has given birth in the hospital, and the parents are very insistent about wanting to place the baby for adoption and the teen refuses to sign.
What happens?
Does the mother go with the infant to foster care? Are the parents legally forced to take them BOTH home?
I know that many times the parents end up bringing home the baby, but what happens when the parents simply refuse?
No reason for asking...just curious.
onyx77
404 Posts
How old is the teenager in question?
TX_ICU_RN
121 Posts
In Texas, the parent is legally required to take care of their child (food, clothing, and shelter) until the age of 18 OR the age of 16 if the child is pregnant or has a child. The teenager is responsible for for the care of the baby is my understanding.
mommy2boysaz
288 Posts
In my experience, the teen (under 18) mother has final say over what happens to her baby. If her parents refuse to take either of them home, I suppose they would both go to foster care, though I've never seen that happen.
Even though the mother doesn't have legal "say" over her own affairs, she does over her child's and no one else can coerce her into putting her child up for adoption.
I'm not an expert, but that is my experience.
Anyone else?
Assume a minor.
I am just reading a postpartum chapter in my maternity book and it had this section on teen mothers.
It had a case study (which we don't have the answers to) where a teen was sent to live with an aunt until she gave birth and her parents arranged for the adoption...but expressed to the nurse that she didn't want to give her baby up for adoption and wanted to stay with her aunt to raise it, but the aunt was not financially able to take them both in.
So I started wondering what would happen if the parents refused to accept the infant home...I have never actually known someone that did that, so I was curious if a nurse that worked OB had seen that happen and what was the outcome.
Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP
4 Articles; 5,259 Posts
I haven't seen it, fortunately. I've seen many cases where initially the mother's parents are angry and say they won't take her back. But I have never seen them actually follow through on that, though that's not to say it wouldn't ever happen.
I think it is awful that someone as young as TWELVE (I have seen this before) is allowed to make a decision such as this. When the mother is 12, it is truly her parents who will be providing everything for both of them. However, since the law today states that the minor gets to make the decision...we have to go with that.
crysobrn
222 Posts
I also haven't seen this. We have more of a problem with minors that WANT to give their babies up and the parents that give them a hard time about it.
I'd think that if the situation arose like one that you are describing and the parents refused to take in the mom and baby then they'd go to foster care until other arrangements could be made. Where I am I've never had a teen mom without many other relatives/friends that would at least help temporararily
shanyone
54 Posts
My mom wanted me to have an abortion and when I wouldn't follow through on her wishes for that she stopped talking to me entirely. I then moved in with my dad. He was much more rationale about the situation (or so I thought). He then started pushing adoption on me and eventually insisted on adoption. I knew that I couldn't give my son up for adoption and I told my dad this.
When the day finally came (in 1992), I delivered my son with both of my parents in the hospital with me. As soon as I had the baby and my mother knew I was safe, she left and I didn't talk to her for about another year and a half after this day (thankfully, we are now good friends and have a very good relationship). My father refused to take me home (and my mother must have as well). I went to foster care with my baby. It was a horrible, scary time for me (thankfully the foster family was WONDERFUL!!). But it was still the most horrible feeling that your parents didn't want you and everyone basically felt that I would fail and had told me so.
I was only in foster care for a short time (a few weeks) before my 17th birthday (in MI you are considered an adult at 17 for these purposes). My dad came back on my birthday and offered to take me home with him and I lived with him again for about 6 months. I found it difficult to forgive my parents for walking away from me at a time when I was scared to death though so I've lived on my own since before I turned 18. I have fought a hard battle to get out of the poverty I chose to start my life in, but I am quite strong and resilient from it.
I think my choices may have made things more diffcult for me but I have earned my associate business degree and I have been working on my nursing degree since 2005. I worked full time throughout all of my schooling. I graduate in 2009 from a great college and I enjoy nursing and clinicals a bunch so I'm really looking forward to being an RN. I always wanted to work in the medical field and now I'll finally be able to do that. I am very much looking forward to becoming a nurse.
Sorry, I got off topic. My answer is yes, in MI you go to foster care if mom and dad won't take you home. I answer this mostly to let you L&D delivering nurses know that some teen moms will do a great job of raising those precious babies (even if the odds are stacked against them). The other reason that I wrote this is to encourage the wonderful L&D nurses to communicate, communicate, communicate with the parents of those pregnant teens and tell them how detrimental foster care and its implications will be on their daughter. Anyway, just my 2 cents.
Thanks,
Shanyone
Oh, and if anyone's wondering...my son is doing amazing!! He's a freshman in high school with a great personality and a B average. I also have a daughter and I got married two years ago.
There are happy endings sometimes (if the mom wants a happy ending and she's willing to work for it). I really don't know how you L&D nurses do it though, because I would have been scared to death to let me walk out of that hospital with that baby boy at 16. God I was scared to death and thinking, "are they really going to let me take him home??"
Quickbeam, BSN, RN
1,011 Posts
I was a juvenile probation officer before I became a nurse. When a teen wanted to keep her baby and come home and the parents didn't want her, she'd be placed in foster care with the baby. The parents would then be billed by the state for her care (wage garnishment if necessary)until their daughter turned 18. On her 18th birthday, she was on her own.
I actually saw more teenagers who wanted an abortion but whose parents thought they should have the child as punishment.
Oh, and if anyone's wondering...my son is doing amazing!! He's a freshman in high school with a great personality and a B average. I also have a daughter and I got married two years ago.There are happy endings sometimes (if the mom wants a happy ending and she's willing to work for it). I really don't know how you L&D nurses do it though, because I would have been scared to death to let me walk out of that hospital with that baby boy at 16. God I was scared to death and thinking, "are they really going to let me take him home??"Shanyone
Congratulations on all of your successes in life! I had my son at 20 in my senior year of my BSN program...that was hard enough. I can't imagine what you have been through, but you have created a wonderful life for yourself and your kids.