Crying with a patient

kp1987 · Aug 8, 2015

Depends, do you have a certain situation in question?

Jules A, MSN · Aug 8, 2015

In my opinion, no, at least not in the full blown crying, hugging, snotting manner. Being empathetic and even minimally tearful during a devastating incident would be expected but not full out crying. I'm wary of anything that could possibly make it more about the nurse than the patient.

Jensmom7, BSN, RN · Aug 8, 2015

Is crying with a patient acceptable?

My first Hospice death visit coincided with the one year anniversary of my mother's death. I did shed a few quiet tears with the family, but held it together until I got out to my car. As someone else said, it was about them, not me.

I managed to get about 2 blocks away before I fell apart, and cried for 20 minutes.

So, to answer your question? Yes, sometimes we cry with patients and families, especially those of us in Hospice. But it is never acceptable to lose control.

Farawyn · Aug 8, 2015

I have. We are human and we have empathy. But just a few tears.

Like the others the ugly cry came later, in my car.

PghRN15 · Aug 8, 2015

I have shed a few tears with a family member, I have never lost control.

abbnurse · Aug 8, 2015

I have. We are human and we have empathy. But just a few tears.
Like the others the ugly cry came later, in my car.

Amen to this!

I had been talking with a patient who'd just had a positive pregnancy test; she'd been gang-raped at a party. She said the worst part was that one of the men who assaulted her was someone she'd considered a friend. She said it so forlornly, with such sadness and bewilderment. I felt my eyes fill with tears, but kept it together. As soon as I was alone, I made it to a back hallway in the clinic (away from patients) and sobbed for ten minutes.

So, yes. It happens.

Emergent, RN · Aug 8, 2015

Yes, we can cry a bit. We feel their pain because we have felt their pain. We have gone through the suffering of loss.

I save the big tears for the supply room, or bathroom. It's not about us or how our mother died from a similar illness. But,s howing our humanity to our patients empathizing, that's so important.