I work in a medical surgical floor and sometimes the requests that A&O3, independent, adult pts ask/make just floor me. No sense of shame and responsibility.
Pass me that cup of water. The table is literally inches away.
Fix my pillow.
Pull up my blankets.
Hold up my urinal. *ugh, I don't think so*
Wipe me. 'What's wrong with your hands?'. 'I can't seem to get everything, it's better if you do it'. 'Well, try and let's see how much you can do'. *he wipes* 'Guess what, you got everything'.
I give them their pills and they lay there expecting me to put in their mouths and hold the water while they drink through the straw like little kings/queens.
The incident that prompted the start of this thread happened a few days ago. It was a pt with an ileo *post op +++". He was being discharged within two days and the ostomy nurse has already visited him and gave pt education on ileo management. Anyway, it was giving +++ ouput and it would start to fill up and leak if not emptied regularly *of course*. This happened three times before I came in for the night shift. It happened again. I went in cleaned up the floor, cleaned him up, helped him change etc. Then he just layed it on me. Talked completely condescendingly saying
'I can't believe that I have to do your job for you. I'm in the hospital. It's your job to empty my pouch. What do you guys even do all day. You expect me to do everything. What's the point of being here?' etc. etc. etc.
Most of the time I don't take things personally and just let pts vent as long as they don't curse or yell. But this guy just rubbed me wrong. I told him:
"NO. This is actually YOUR job. There is nothing wrong with your hands. You are completely independent. The nurses help out people who can't do things for themselves. You can empty your own pouch. And when you leave here, who is going to do it for you at home? I understand you are frustrated but please don't blame it on me or the other nurses. It's an important part of your therapy that you be as independent as possible. I won't hesitate to help you but I won't do things for you that you perfectly capable of."
He didn't like it but he emptied it himself and stopped waiting for us to constantly check in to see if it's time to empty.
OH, WELL!!!
This job has made me more assertive than I ever thought I would be. Or else I would be staying behind all the time finishing up my work!
and more than one middle-aged male wanted me to refuse his wife admittance when his girlfriend was visiting.
oh come on, help a guy out! haha. kidding. its amazing when people get brought through the doors of a hospital, the rules of society don't apply to them. since being a nurse, i've been really assertive. especially when outside the hospital. people (drunks) will come up to me and ask for money for "food." i flat out and say, "no, i'm not an atm." and walk away. haha. again, some people.
Patients don't understand we are trying to make them independent. They whinge & whine that they're 'so weak' they can't even put a tablet in their mouth or lift a glass, yet they tell me they have re-vamped all their garden and/or house themselves b4 coming into hospital! We as nurses have to tell them we are trying to make them independent. I know they have a lot of pain sometimes, but we still have to try & get them to do things, as you say, who is going to do tasks for them when they get home (& many old people live alone as their partners have died, kids have left home, etc). They get pampered by their families, who think doing everything for them is helpful, but I was taught even when someone has pain, they must try to live with that pain & still do their ADLs. People are fooled by drug companies and TV shows where u see actors take a pill & they're pain is miraculously gone! Quite often we can only control pain, not take it away completely, the the staff get blamed for 'not getting rid of grandma's pain, so u must be a horrid, nasty nurse'. I always try to explain the above to the family members as well as the patient, but they still think we have a magic wand, unfortunately.
It gets discouraging sometimes but u did the right thing.
Ha! I like the ones that want u to wash & set their hair as well, and give them a shoulder, leg and neck massage! As if...
I admit that I've done this on occasion with the wee lil old ladies who have a full box of curlers and pins sittin there but nobody to put them in for her. Time permitting of course. I consider it therapeutic for the nurse-patient thing and many of these ladies take pride in their hair and would never be seen in public around the gentlemen so disheveled. It makes them feel better about themselves.
But I draw the line at ANY massage for anyone, I am not an RMT... or back scratching, get a back scratcher at the $1 store!
I've said it before and I'll say it again: these patients have a serious hospital acquired infection called "Tyrannosaurus Rex Syndrome". Their little wavy arms in front are useless and just for show.
A prisoner once kindly asked me if I would shave his balls for him since he wasn't allowed.
An ambulatory woman once asked me to get a washcloth and itch her lady parts for her.
A woman with dietary restrictions asked me to go to the Wendy's across the street to pick her up a meal. She obviously didn't care about the dietary restrictions, but she couldn't quite understand why I couldn't leave the hospital to go get her food...she goes "I thought yall did that stuff for patients"
Maybe I'm just too nice... but if I am slightly closer to something then one of my patients I'll just grab it for them. It's no big deal as long as its a simple request (tissue, cup). I've never had a crazy request, yet!
And I also put medications in my residents mouth and hold the water for them at night. But I work with 90 year olds that go to bed at 8pm even though I pass meds at 9pm. I'd rather just sit them up and do it for them. I think it's mean to turn their bright lights on, take off their covers (since the elderly are always cold!), wait for them to wake up enough to hold the pill cup and water just because they should do everything for themselves. And usually, once you wake them up, they have a terrible time falling back asleep. I would just never do that to my residents.
"Excuse me nurse, can you give me a pedicure, I have visitors coming today!" Sure thing I'll get right on that!
Um I had a resident's daughter ask me to give her one.
Maybe I'm just too nice... but if I am slightly closer to something then one of my patients I'll just grab it for them. It's no big deal as long as its a simple request (tissue, cup). I've never had a crazy request, yet!
And I also put medications in my residents mouth and hold the water for them at night. But I work with 90 year olds that go to bed at 8pm even though I pass meds at 9pm. I'd rather just sit them up and do it for them. I think it's mean to turn their bright lights on, take off their covers (since the elderly are always cold!), wait for them to wake up enough to hold the pill cup and water just because they should do everything for themselves. And usually, once you wake them up, they have a terrible time falling back asleep. I would just never do that to my residents.
I refuse to grab a phone or tissue or something that is right in front of them, especially if that is all they rang for. I hold the cup for my residents as well. I work nights, a lot of them shake, and I don't want them covering themselves and/or the bed in cold water. Some insist on holding their own cups, but I still help to hold them just in case.
Maybe I'm just too nice... but if I am slightly closer to something then one of my patients I'll just grab it for them. It's no big deal as long as its a simple request (tissue, cup). I've never had a crazy request, yet!
And I also put medications in my residents mouth and hold the water for them at night. But I work with 90 year olds that go to bed at 8pm even though I pass meds at 9pm. I'd rather just sit them up and do it for them. I think it's mean to turn their bright lights on, take off their covers (since the elderly are always cold!), wait for them to wake up enough to hold the pill cup and water just because they should do everything for themselves. And usually, once you wake them up, they have a terrible time falling back asleep. I would just never do that to my residents.
I think that's a different situation--I'd much rather dump a couple pills in a LOL's mouth and hold their cup than have to search the blankets, sheets, gown, and floor for dropped pills and/or do a full bed change after an ice water spill. Now, the 30-something in for wrist surgery who wants the TV channel changed? She's out of luck.
Time permitting of course. I consider it therapeutic for the nurse-patient thing and many of these ladies take pride in their hair and would never be seen in public around the gentlemen so disheveled. It makes them feel better about themselves.
Sara RN
8 Posts
As a young nursing student I had a elderly patient ask me to elevate his testicles on a wash cloth while he was sitting in a chair.