Coworkers discussing my health info

Published

I have been an RN for over 30 years, and I currently work in home care. I also have bipolar disorder, which is very well controlled. Recently I was hospitalized because I was getting suicidal. The day I realized I was in trouble, I called my patient's mother and asked her to come home. It was a difficult recovery, and I missed 2 months of work. The mom knew I had bipolar disorder (big mistake on my part). My company gave my job away after 2 weeks, even though they held my job in the past when I had surgery and was out for a month. Not nice, but legal. Now I am healthy, and there are open hours on my job. My employer is OK with my return, and I do have a doctor's note stating I am fit to work. My problem is that the other 3 nurses on my case are telling the mother she should not let me come back. I don't even know 2 of the nurses, and the third takes daily medication for depression. Keep in mind, I was employee of the month earlier this year, for the entire southwest region of my state. I have NEVER endangered my patient or anyone else for that matter. I am taking issue with my coworkers discussing my personal health information and deciding if I am fit for duty. I have an appointment scheduled with my supervisor next week, but I'm looking for some advice as to what to say. I just want my coworkers to mind their own business and avoid making the work environment hostile. I hadn't been hospitalized in many years, and even if I was, it doesn't make me a bad or dangerous nurse. Help me please!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

How do you know they talked about you ?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
The mom knew I had bipolar disorder (big mistake on my part).

It seems like you may have jump-started the conversation(s) for them. I am also curious as to where you're getting this information from.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER.

It sound like you are the one who told the mom. You admit it was a mistake.

Whether you like it or not, many people would have a problem with allowing a bipolar nurse, who had to take a 2 month break because of her illness, back into their home.

I personally am very nervous about who I let into my home. I even feel worried about the dog sitter. I've thought of hiring people to help me clean, but I'm too nervous about having someone poke around my house. Call me paranoid, but many people feel the same way. Add to that that you are caring for their child.

I think maybe you should seek employment with a new agency, get a fresh start, and put this behind you.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

The mom told me that the 3 nurses said "it would be a big mistake" to let me return to my job.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Not that it matters, but her child is an adult. I was the only full time nurse caring for him for the last 3 years. Spending 3 years in someone's home, the mom and I got close, and in retrospect, too personal. Just because I needed 2 months off doesn't mean I am unqualified or dangerous to a patient. I knew I needed help, and I got it. Funny, they held my job for 5 months when I broke my leg, but 2 months off with a mental illness is turning out to be a death sentence for my career. They are both medical problems, but still, in 2016 it isn't seen that way.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Getting my info from the mother, who can't wait for me to come back (her words, she's calling me)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER.
The mom told me that the 3 nurses said "it would be a big mistake" to let me return to my job.

If that is correct, report that to your agency. This is pretty clear cut. If Mom is your ally, she will back you up.

Regarding home care and getting too personal, yes, I did a couple of cases years ago. You are on their turf, and it's very personal. It's only natural.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med/Surge, Psych, LTC, Home Health.

If the mom is eager for you to come back, knows you well and is confident in you... Go back! Enjoy your job again and to heck with those other nurses who have no business discussing your illness.

Eventually, hopefully sooner than later, this will all blow over. It is good that you are meeting with your supervisor over this issue. Hopefully your supervisor can help somehow, to ensure that this DOES blow over like it should. Good luck!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
The mom told me that the 3 nurses said "it would be a big mistake" to let me return to my job.

What is the mother's motivation for telling you that these three nurses (all three) think having you back would be a big mistake? Could it be that the mother actually has concerns and is trying to be diplomatic by "suggesting" them instead of stating them outright?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Start over on another case and write a letter to the DON delineating what the nurses have been talking about and formally requesting action. If your DON and agency refuse to put the other nurses in their place, then find a job with a new employer, and keep your mouth shut from now on.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Sour Lemon, mom has been in touch with me frequently, asking me to return. It started when she said "I can't wait for you to come back, even though (nurses A, B, and C) don't think you should come back. But (expletive) them, none of them take care of (pt) half as well as you do". And I'm not just trying to throw the other nurses under the bus.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion