i am the most confused and unhappy person ever. please help me

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Oct 25, 2009

I'm pretty carefree myself, but not on clinical exams.

You must change the casual attitude or you are doomed, at least, in nursing programs.

Good luck.

:)

mamamerlee, LPN · Oct 25, 2009

You may need some career counselling, or general counselling. You think of yourself as 'carefree', I see someone who is easily distracted and unable to focus. I obviously cannot diagnose you, but your issues sound somewhat like those typical for ADD. You are very bright but may need some guidance.

techjob4u · Oct 25, 2009

Maybe you just need time off.

I did horrible my 1st year of community college even failed a few class's.

My head was not in the game. I went to work in some crummy jobs and got partying out of my system and went back to school a few years later.

I was ready to go back and my grades went back up to A and B+ across the board.

Maybe you dont need a few years and a crappy boss yelling at you like me. Maybe you need a few weeks. Just take a step back and when you think you are ready. You are ready!

caliotter3 · Oct 25, 2009

Failing at anything is a draining and debilitating experience. You probably did not give yourself enough time to grieve and recover from the RN school experience. Please take some time to yourself to get the negative feelings under control. Engage in good health practices, relaxation, and some quiet introspection and reflection about what went wrong and how you are going to go about changing the behaviors that need changing. Then approach LVN school with quiet determination to do things differently. And stop beating yourself up over things that can not be changed. Now it is time to change future behavior.

allnurses Guide · Oct 25, 2009

It's really, really great that your mom is putting down $5000 and taking out a loan for you. But it would be a huge mistake on your part to let the thought of you not meeting her expectations propel you into doing something you're not ready for. I feel really bad for you, but switching from RN to CNA to LVN isn't the way to solve this.

Read Caliotter3's post and really take it to heart. If you are bouncing off the walls you will not succeed in nursing school. I know that must sound harsh, but it really is true. We've seen what happens to a student who is not-ready, doing-it-to-please-family, etc.

I hope someday your Mom can see you graduate from whatever career path you choose. Best wishes for you.:)

CASTLEGATES · Oct 25, 2009

Do you know when the impulsivity part of the brain is finished developing? Insurance rates are a clue; they lower drastically at 25 but really the age is 27 when we start to settle and the frontal lobe is done.

When I was 22, my brain was all over and I wasn't done partying and being a complete idiot and I got some C's because of it but somehow finished the next year. I did study a LOT and fought hard for some of those C's but I was just too immature (going back to school I've had 100% every test, honors and all that jazz and I'm still me...the variable was my age and maturity).

Working and getting into a routine helped me. Joining the military slapped me right into shape; 13 weeks of infantry training and I learned fast to listen to instructions. I joined because I KNEW I had issues similar to what you're saying but it served me well to pay attention to detail and do as I was told regardless of what I was thinking.

I'll never forget one of our most effective instructors (when some discussion negating something in the book or lecture would ensue) would say CHANGE YOUR THINKING; end of discussion. She repeated that enough to the point where I changed my thinking and actually STOPPED thinking and did exactly as they told me. Ohhh life got better but I was still young.

You definitely need a school partner. Someone you hang out with daily and all day all night study, practice like in lab and theory. I disagree with the add thing; I personally believe that condition is extremely rare and given the fact you have some insight...just my uneducated opinion...

In science, one cannot be carefree. In high school, sure! When school's out, run around naked, woohoo! :jester: Perhaps joining the reserves would give you a wake up and pay for college. It woke me right up and was exactly what my boundary-less, goal-less life needed.

gonzo1, ASN, RN · Oct 25, 2009

Before you let your mom put up 5000$ you need to take some time and get to know yourself better. You need time to grow up (I mean that in the nicest way) and tackle some smaller projects before you embark on a nursing degree.

Nursing, esp the 2 year ADN is considered one of the most challenging programs out there because you are learning 4 years of stuff in 2 in order to pass the same class the bachelor nurses take.

It requires dedication and attention to detail.

Why don't you finish your prereqs, complete your CNA and work as a CNA for a year, then try again.

wonderbee, BSN, RN · Oct 25, 2009

Nursing can be very tedious. Attention to detail is a must. Whatever your problem is, remember there is a flesh and blood human being depending on you to be fully attentive. It is better to fail at school than to fail your patient. Not that we don't all make mistakes because we all do. But as bad as you feel now, you will feel 100 times worse when your mom has put 5k into your schooling, your patients have poor outcomes, your supervisors want your blood and the Board of Nursing wants your license back.

I urge you to consider all your options. Counseling is a great idea. You will better be able to identify your strengths and weaknesses. Look before you leap. You are still very young and may simply not be ready yet. There's a world of options out there.

God bless your mom!

kaiasunshine · Oct 25, 2009

*this might not mean anything to you, but I failed my care aid course the first time too! It was absolutely because I was not placing enough importance on the course- I had thought I was trying hard but looking back, I'd sort of felt like I knew it all and did not pay as much attention as I should have. I've also been an extremely carefree, daydreamy person, it's just what I'm like. Anyway, I guess that traveled over into the practicum because, after a bunch of small mistakes throughout it but nothing too bad, in the last week of school I *forgot a bed in the high position* while I went on my break...and the lady was a fall risk.

I failed on the second-last day of the program.

Anyway, I was completely devastated. I cried and cried and was angry and thought it was unfair and was so upset with myself, and then I got back into the program asap. I did it again and got top of my class. I'm now working as a care aid and am on my way to do practical nursing next september, then I'm planning on doing nursing.

You need to tell yourself that you're going to do this. None of that "I can do it!" ********, there is no "can" or "can't," only "will" and "won't." You're going to do this and nothing is going to stop you. You're willing to dedicate your life to this. There has to be something wrong if you don't get it when you have that much dedication!! Get a tutor, whether or not you feel you need it. Go to study groups, whether or not you think it will help. Don't have a job while you're going to school, find study techniques that work for you, and remind yourself every day that nothing is going to get in the way of getting this.