I have a fairly important question regarding the personal requirements of nursing. Most of everyone in my family has some sort of medical degree and I am following suit (after a less than climactic career in engineering). I identify pretty well with the people in my family in regards to personality and they all have encouraged me so far in the nursing program, each telling me I will do very well.
So heres the issue:
I keep coming across references to "Compassion" being a "common sense requirement" to be a nurse. This DOES NOT click with me or my personality. I like to think I have a science based logic and frame of mind, I am goal oriented, and I love a good challenge, excitement, and nigh impossible deadlines. This I can see being useful in being a nurse. However, I am not that compassionate of a person. Most of the time I believe that what happens is a consequence of your own actions. I do not easily feel sympathetic towards people and quite honestly am very irritated by drama and over acting. I have read and come across information explicitly stating that this is the number one reason NOT to be a nurse.
I have to admit, I am doing it for the money and job stability. I will most likely never work full time and I will never bring my work home with me WHEN POSSIBLE. I don't feel sorry for the sick, the injured, the unfortunate - IMO thats the way the world turns. I am in no way christian, bhuddist, jewish, agnostic, atheist, etc... I relate to Pantheism if I had to pick something spiritual to believe in. I do not agree with religion and would never pretend to. This being said, I CAN hold my tongue - I am actually quite the pro at it. Edit: I should also mention that I am very capable and I am very professional in work situations. I exhibit respect for other's opinions and beliefs. I just won't fake my own.
I am very good at carrying out instructions, working with a clear mind, getting the job done objectively. When it comes to critical thinking I can get it done subjectively as well. Those boundaries are malleable - the ones that aren't are the ones concerning my emotions. I like people in general when they are not consumed with themselves or taking themselves too seriously.
Am I a recipe for disaster when I begin working as a nurse? Should I cut my losses and withdraw from my nursing program so far - (Which I enjoy the moderate challenge)
Without WANTING to help the sick and injured I can still be a great nurse in my opinion. I'm not saying I would have a problem carrying out the duties of a nurse, but honestly it isn't what I wake up wanting to do. I am not a Mother Teresa. I want to be a nurse, like I said, to have the money, flexibility, and job security. I didn't even consider being a nurse until I realized the pay rate and demand. Don't get me wrong - I will do the job and do it to the best of my ability and I will follow direction easily without involving my own opinions, but I will not pretend to be sympathetic or empathetic. Thats just me.
Anyone else feel this way? Are you a nurse that has a similar personality? If so please tell me your experience as a nurse.
EDIT: I am convinced that my lack of ability in being outwardly compassionate lends to my ability to "not freak out" in emergency situations. I have been known to carry out my responsibilities like nothing has happened. I wanted to be an EMT originally, but unfortunately they are paid like chumps... ):
Maybe you are on to something. Some things are not disclosed as they would immediately be attacked for validity and called out for suspicion of being apocryphal.
Maybe my post came off too rigid because I am trying to address the most pressing concerns. I do have compassion I just don't show it easily. I do not gush over people's babies, but I feel responsible for their safety as much as any other adult while in a group. While I may seem cold, I am usually the first person to pull over when I see a car wreck or to help when I see someone in physical distress. I am just not emotionally attached to the actions, if that makes sense.
Don't think that I would be judge you based ony our opinion. I appreciate any and all input regarding the matter as I want to make an educated decision. As I had to state a few other times, my post came off very rigid because I addressed only the attributes I see getting in the way based on descriptions of other nurse's desire to go into the field.
Am I reply to the comments correctly? I am clickling "quick reply" on the messages I wish to reply to but it seems as if all of them are ending up on the last page all grouped together. I am new to the site, and apologize for improper posting..
Could you please link to the post? I would, for certain, appreciate reading the comments there as well. I apologize if you feel as if I am someone reposting for attention. Had I wanted attention, maybe, I would have included more personal information and not just that to get opinions to form an educated decision off of? Then again, this is just a thought.
Maybe my post came off too rigid because I am trying to address the most pressing concerns. I do have compassion I just don't show it easily. I do not gush over people's babies, but I feel responsible for their safety as much as any other adult while in a group. While I may seem cold, I am usually the first person to pull over when I see a car wreck or to help when I see someone in physical distress. I am just not emotionally attached to the actions, if that makes sense.
Click on "reply with quote" so your response will be linked to the one you are answering.
Well, with your clarification, I might have to change my mind a little. I am somewhat the same as you (especially with the gushing over babies thing...totally not my style!) But I still think you need to think long and hard about this career choice, not for the good of your future patients, but for your own good. Compassion fatigue is a very real thing that happens to many people in helping fields. I wonder if you might not be at risk for experiencing it sooner, or more strongly, since you are not as much of a "touchy feely" emotionally driven person. Just something to think about. Really you are the only one who can decide if this is a career for you, but I think you've received a lot of information here to think over. You also might try shadowing a nurse or even working as a tech to see if it is something you can see yourself doing.
Your clarification is very useful. Honestly, you don't have to be Mother Theresa to be an effective and successful nurse. Technically you don't have to have any compassion or empathy for other human beings at all and still become a nurse. But then again, when in doubt rely on good old fashioned common sense. I have an intense weakness when it comes to math, I truly struggle with it. Because of this weakness I realized that becoming an astrophysicist was more than likely out of the question. Likewise why go into nursing if you don't care if the people around you live or die? The problem is quite simple.
In your case based off of your clarification, you simply don't express compassion outwardly and yet you DO have a desire to help those in need. That's quite different from your original post that said something along the lines that you felt nothing for those that are ill or injured as they are the victims of their own action. If you do desire to help those in need, you will more than likely find more fulfillment than if you view your patients as victims of some feral form of Karma.
Specializes in Mental Health, Medical Research, Periop.
I am prepared to do it - I guess my thoughts came out wrong. It just isn't "what I dreamed of doing as a child". Does this make sense?
My concern was only that you felt obligated to the profession based on your familys preference (from your original post this is what I picked up), therefore possible leaving you in an unhappy career. Much Luck!
sirI, MSN, APRN, NP
17 Articles; 45,877 Posts
You are welcome, too.