Compassion required???

[jellyfishmafia]

I have a fairly important question regarding the personal requirements of nursing. Most of everyone in my family has some sort of medical degree and I am following suit (after a less than climactic career in engineering). I identify pretty well with the people in my family in regards to personality and they all have encouraged me so far in the nursing program, each telling me I will do very well.

So heres the issue:

I keep coming across references to "Compassion" being a "common sense requirement" to be a nurse. This DOES NOT click with me or my personality. I like to think I have a science based logic and frame of mind, I am goal oriented, and I love a good challenge, excitement, and nigh impossible deadlines. This I can see being useful in being a nurse. However, I am not that compassionate of a person. Most of the time I believe that what happens is a consequence of your own actions. I do not easily feel sympathetic towards people and quite honestly am very irritated by drama and over acting. I have read and come across information explicitly stating that this is the number one reason NOT to be a nurse.

I have to admit, I am doing it for the money and job stability. I will most likely never work full time and I will never bring my work home with me WHEN POSSIBLE. I don't feel sorry for the sick, the injured, the unfortunate - IMO thats the way the world turns. I am in no way christian, bhuddist, jewish, agnostic, atheist, etc... I relate to Pantheism if I had to pick something spiritual to believe in. I do not agree with religion and would never pretend to. This being said, I CAN hold my tongue - I am actually quite the pro at it. Edit: I should also mention that I am very capable and I am very professional in work situations. I exhibit respect for other's opinions and beliefs. I just won't fake my own.

I am very good at carrying out instructions, working with a clear mind, getting the job done objectively. When it comes to critical thinking I can get it done subjectively as well. Those boundaries are malleable - the ones that aren't are the ones concerning my emotions. I like people in general when they are not consumed with themselves or taking themselves too seriously.

Am I a recipe for disaster when I begin working as a nurse? Should I cut my losses and withdraw from my nursing program so far - (Which I enjoy the moderate challenge)

Without WANTING to help the sick and injured I can still be a great nurse in my opinion. I'm not saying I would have a problem carrying out the duties of a nurse, but honestly it isn't what I wake up wanting to do. I am not a Mother Teresa. I want to be a nurse, like I said, to have the money, flexibility, and job security. I didn't even consider being a nurse until I realized the pay rate and demand. Don't get me wrong - I will do the job and do it to the best of my ability and I will follow direction easily without involving my own opinions, but I will not pretend to be sympathetic or empathetic. Thats just me.

Anyone else feel this way? Are you a nurse that has a similar personality? If so please tell me your experience as a nurse.

EDIT: I am convinced that my lack of ability in being outwardly compassionate lends to my ability to "not freak out" in emergency situations. I have been known to carry out my responsibilities like nothing has happened. I wanted to be an EMT originally, but unfortunately they are paid like chumps... ):

[steelydanfan]

"Without wanting to help the sick and injured, I can still be a great nurse".

Uh, EXACTLY what is it that you are prepared to do? Are you kidding?

[ajeanpants]

I had a patient this year who unexpectedly had a bowel perf, sepsis, and almost died (many other complications that I won't go into). He had a healthy lifestyle, a beautiful family, and he was young. Recovery took a very long time and I'm sure it was some of the darkest times of his life. Yet he was a ray of sunshine in the hospital, keeping positive and hopeful and really encouraging lots of other patients. He said his nurses made all the difference, that he could tell when nurses cared or didn't care, and the ones that did care helped him get through this time in his life. Keep in mind that not every illness is your patient's own fault, sometimes their being sick really is just plain unfair, and whether or not it is the "way the world turns" your compassion (or lack thereof) can literally change someone's life. Nursing is a tough job... I can't imagine doing it without caring about the people that I'm providing care for.

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

Sick patients, (whether their own doing or not) are keeping nurses employed. Without them what would we need a majority of nurses for? If you are in nursing for the money, remember the next time you see that patient that they are a good reason why you have a paycheck.

[Ashley_RN]

OP, I cant imagine there hasnt been a time where you have been sick/injured, thinking 'this sucks' and someone was there to comfort you or atleast empathize. I certainly cant imagine being told "well thats the way the world turns..." I personally would feel even worse.

Is compassion necessary, no. But does it make a difference, I say absolutely yes. I wish you luck in whichever path you choose... and hope that compassion turns out to be one of those things you can learn, if its nursing you decide.

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

OP, I cant imagine there hasnt been a time where you have been sick/injured, thinking 'this sucks' and someone was there to comfort you or atleast empathize. I certainly cant imagine being told "well thats the way the world turns..." I personally would feel even worse.

Is compassion necessary, no. But does it make a difference, I say absolutely yes. I wish you luck in whichever path you choose... and hope that compassion turns out to be one of those things you can learn, if its nursing you decide.

Hmmm..........not that I am Freud or anything but: This is a possibility. TC comes from family in the medical field. Not hard to imagine mom coming home, while you have a cold and saying something to the effect of "Oh, thats nothing, you should have seen what I saw on the unit today. You're fine. That's how the world turns." Sometimes off duty nurses are not the most compassionate people in the world.

Say for instance TC missed a great school trip because of the flu and she was told "Thats how the world turns."

Oh geee, this is getting so................campy? IDK what to call it.

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

Hmmm..........not that I am Freud or anything but: This is a possibility. TC comes from family in the medical field. Not hard to imagine mom coming home, while you have a cold and saying something to the effect of "Oh, thats nothing, you should have seen what I saw on the unit today. You're fine. That's how the world turns." Sometimes off duty nurses are not the most compassionate people in the world.

Say for instance TC missed a great school trip because of the flu and she was told "Thats how the world turns."

Oh geee, this is getting so................campy? IDK what to call it.

LOL Funny, I am a pretty compassionate person, but when it comes to my kids; if you aren't dying, brush it off and move on. I have been like this way before even considering nursing. It was also how I was raised. Compassion and my family did not go together. Prime example, 11 year old had N/V/D a few weeks ago. I told him to make sure he didn't miss the toilet or trashcan because I wasn't cleaning up puke. :| Guess it's good my kids are forced to employ me or I might be fired!

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

LOL Funny, I am a pretty compassionate person, but when it comes to my kids; if you aren't dying, brush it off and move on. I have been like this way before even considering nursing. It was also how I was raised. Compassion and my family did not go together. Prime example, 11 year old had N/V/D a few weeks ago. I told him to make sure he didn't miss the toilet or trashcan because I wasn't cleaning up puke. :| Guess it's good my kids are forced to employ me or I might be fired!

Ah, so my theory that, coming from a medical family may have slanted TC's view of illness is not completely without warrant.

Or it could just be a sign that this thread has jumped the shark. lol

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

Well my family was military not medical, but they can be similar at times! Whenever I was sick I was told, it's the weather you're fine. I was waiting for the day I lost an arm or my skin turned black so I could ask exactly how the weather was causing this.

[That Guy, BSN, RN, EMT-B]

Well my family was military not medical, but they can be similar at times! Whenever I was sick I was told, it's the weather you're fine. I was waiting for the day I lost an arm or my skin turned black so I could ask exactly how the weather was causing this.

My mom said if I could talk and I had no extra corners I was fine. It took me cracking my skull open to get a trip to the hospital.

[CompleteUnknown]

My mom said if I could talk and I had no extra corners I was fine. It took me cracking my skull open to get a trip to the hospital.

Same sentiment in my family, but not so wonderfully expressed!!

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

Same sentiment in my family, but not so wonderfully expressed!!

Eh.

Ummm..............

Well.......................I don't get it. What's an "extra corner"?

[CompleteUnknown]

Well, I'm thinking bone sticking out, arm hanging off, that sort of thing. Lol.