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Comments from the peanut gallery....

Has 21 years experience. Specializes in Emergency.

Gotta love the comments from the families...

pt is 80something female brought in by family (all live together) for diff breathing/sob. pt is satting 100% on ra (put her on lowflow o2 nc anyway), other vs also normal, talking in complete sentences, lungs clear, no labor in breathing but has a cardiac & asthma hx. So, line & labs are called for and I hear....

son: "she's a hard stick boy, you better get it the first time."

mmm, that helped. :uhoh3: It was pretty much like that for the rest of their stay, snide comments and complaints about the temperature of the room, availability of food, etc. And oh yeah, they're here about every other week. NOTE: while she actually is a hard stick, the pt herself is pleasant.

nrsang97, BSN, RN

Has 19 years experience. Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

Usually the pt isn't the problem. The famlies are usually the insane ones.

suzy253, RN

Specializes in Telemetry/Med Surg.

Usually the pt isn't the problem. The famlies are usually the insane ones.

that's for sure!!!

traumagirll99

Specializes in er,cvicu,icu.

When I hear this I always want to say"Or what? Are YOU going to do it?"

Larry77, RN

Has 10 years experience. Specializes in Trauma/ED.

I just don't understand some people, don't they know we are professionals who are there to HELP them and their family members. Instead of picking us apart lets work as a team to get their family members better or at least reassure the crazy family that they are OK. This same scenario happens all the time everywhere...get a grip families!

I've had similar things said to me and I just stop look at them and say "Excuse me?" Usually they get a little nicer and say, "Well last time it took them 5 tries."

Been a few times where family had to be escorted out by security...

God help me, I hope I'm not one of those people....but sometimes I probably have been. My mother is 93 and is of a generation where the Dr is always right, and since she also confuses the volunteers with Dr.'s at the hospital....she's sure all medical people are always right. My sister passed away almost 2 years ago of breast cancer, and much of the care she got was excellent, but again she wasn't one to complain, and so I sometimes saw her poorly treated....so I have often advocated for them, and sometimes, on two hours sleep, and enough stress to send a wind up toy around the world twice, I'm sure I've some times said some stupid and rude things.....I'm sorry.

Canadian_Nurse

Has 12 years experience. Specializes in Obs.

Usually the pt isn't the problem. The famlies are usually the insane ones.

:yeahthat:

RN1982

Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

I do the "Excuse me?" thing too. Usually families straighten up after that. If I have to stick a patient for blood, I make the family go to the waiting room. I hate audiences. I've also done "If you don't stop yelling at your family member, who is sedated/vented, to wake up or open their eyes, you are going to have to leave". I've also said to a GSW patient's sister "Stop babying your brother, he's 18 years old with perfectly working arms and can drink his water without your help."

Altra, BSN, RN

Specializes in Emergency & Trauma/Adult ICU.

I've also said, "Or .... what?" If they continue badgering, then it's time to stop until they've heeded my *suggestion* to head to the waiting room to take a break.

RN1982

Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

Did I tell you all about the time I was reported because I took a piece of tape off a patient and the family thought I was being "rough"? It was the same GSW patient from my previous post, shot twice in one year. A real winner of society. They can act all hard in the streets and play with guns but once they get shot, it's "act-like-a-baby" time. Their stupidity is our job security.

diane227, LPN, RN

Has 32 years experience. Specializes in Management, Emergency, Psych, Med Surg.

I love it when these young gang bangers start calling for momma. Momma can't help you now.

Maybe there is more behind their lives than we know. Who's to judge? People don't become like that for no reason.

RN1982

Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

Maybe there is more behind their lives than we know. Who's to judge? People don't become like that for no reason.

You are probably right. BUT, I'm sorry, if you have been shot twice in a year and you have gang tattoos all over your arms and you are throwing gang signs to your friends, there is nothing more to that story. Their stupidity is our job security.

traumagirll99

Specializes in er,cvicu,icu.

Maybe there is more behind their lives than we know. Who's to judge? People don't become like that for no reason.

I know that this is not exactly in line with the original topic started here but....it never ceases to amaze me how just about everytime a topic is started that contains the LEAST bit of normal venting someone has to make some deep profound remark that essentially points out how mean and uncaring nurses are (and yes I know that was a run on sentence but I don't care).

Blee O'Myacin, BSN, RN

Specializes in ED, ICU, Heme/Onc.

Maybe there is more behind their lives than we know. Who's to judge? People don't become like that for no reason.

It's possible to be a competent, professional nurse without loving all our patients - or even respecting the choices they've made for themselves. Michigan and others come here to vent because it's hard to constantly put yourself out and there is no support from upper management when patients and families leave their manners at the door if they even have them. Please don't take offense, but I suggest you withhold judgement until you've experienced this without a preceptor or clinical instructor as your backup. Seriously - it's a completely different experience.

I applaud Michigan and other nurses that stand up for themselves and don't allow themselves to be a doormat for others.

Blee

I never said to lay down and be a doormat.. Just have known people who have dropped into that sad (and, I agree.. ridiculous) gang road.

Nor did I ever say that anyone here is a mean or uncaring nurse. Some of the nurses who posted (especially MichiganRN) have posted some things that I have found quite helpful.

Just asking for people to look on the other side. I know a teacher from Camden.. The stories she hears.. It's sad. It's no wonder these kids turn to gangs to have a family. But I also applaud the ones who rise above.

I understand you think I'm judging your vent. I was not. Was simply asking to see life from another's eyes.

And never would I suggest someone I don't know to be an uncaring nurse. I know I already said that. But it bothers me that anyone would put words in my mouth that I did not.. in this instance.. type. :D

al7139, ASN, RN

Has 5 years experience. Specializes in Emergency.

As a nurse, I think that it is important that we treat all of our patients with respect, no matter their background or history. Hate to state the obvious, but when you are treating patients, you are also treating their family members as well, and this can be difficult and frustrating.

It is very hard for us to look at the heroin addict here for an OD or infection the same as the nice man who has CHF next door, but we have to do it no matter what we say in private to our colleagues. Yes we have to set limits on what is acceptable behavior, but we need to try to help too.

I try to meet a new patient and their family with an open mind no matter what I have been told by the previous nurse. Lots of times it is a communication issue coupled by bad experiences with other hospitals or health care workers (unfortunate, but true). Greeting them and letting them know what is expected for my shift (procedures, labs, etc.) helps, as well as taking the time to listen to their concerns (my patients, if they can communicate, can tell me if they are a hard stick, or if they want things done a certain way). Also trying to anticipate their needs helps to decrease the callbellitis. If family is a problem, I talk to them with the patients permission about what is going on, and what the plan is for care on my shift, as well as try to get them involved in the care like helping with feeding, and ICS.

Most difficult people just need a little direction and education to make them happy, but there are those who are never satisfied, and they are the hardest to work with, and will usually misinterpret everything you do or say, so in these cases, I try to have another person in the room with me, and document everything.

Amy

AngelfireRN, MSN, RN, APRN

Has 15 years experience. Specializes in med-surg, psych, ER, school nurse-CRNP.

I know that this is not exactly in line with the original topic started here but....it never ceases to amaze me how just about everytime a topic is started that contains the LEAST bit of normal venting someone has to make some deep profound remark that essentially points out how mean and uncaring nurses are (and yes I know that was a run on sentence but I don't care).

I know what you mean. You just can NOT have a good old-fashioned vent thread anymore. I wish that sometimes there was a trigger like we wish we had for those incessant callbell-ringers that would hit them like a shock collar, only it should be wired into the keyboard. If someone comes on our vent threads with a snide remark or profound statement, the minute they hit enter...WHAM!!!!!

I can think of more than a few people on more than a few threads I'd pay money to see that work on.

Thank you, you may all jump on the "OMG, you're so MEAN" bandwagon at once.:D

sweetsounds

Has 14 years experience. Specializes in M/S,TELE,ORTHO,ER.

You know what I like even better about the "hard stick" comments from families? When the pt is actually handling it fine but the family member is traumatized. That's right(family member), it's all about you! Sheesh!

Valerie Salva, BSN, RN

Has 19 years experience.

When I hear this I always want to say "Or what? Are YOU going to do it?"

I had a pt who's daughter was a nursing student.

They got all ***** because I would not let the daughter do the stick.

Excuse me, but this is not your clinical, and I am not your clinical instructor. It's my job to do the stick and it's my license...mmmkay?

Maybe when they had their lectures on following policies, procedures, professional responsiblilities, professional bounderies, and the law, this girl was absent.

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