Charting Bloopers

[DrNurseCNS]

On 1/12/2003 at 7:55 PM, TNcanNURSE said:

I don't suppose this is an error but it was definitely different:

on the results from a UA

traces of talcum powder

Hmm, sounds like a future cervical cancer patient.

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

sevensonnets said:

Patient's family had some questions for the doc so I paged him to call them in the room, but they had already left. Patient herself age 94 answers the phone. The doc then calls me and says, "Do NOT call me back. I don't know what channel Wheel of Fortune's on!"

You paged him to call them, they had left.

What???

[jobellestarr]

"I did everything for patient and she's still ***.” Nice. 

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

jobellestarr said:

"I did everything for patient and she's still ***.” Nice. 

Is this for real???

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

Katillac said:

Talk to text errors just in one shift's charting:

• Had a bed elevated city for degree.
• Patient was asleep when this nurse arrived at the TVs to sleep at this time.
• This is a pain anxiety on the respiratory distress.
• 100 ml bloody irons
• Skidmore to dry

And my favorites:

• Adamant discretion dissolved in morphine.
• Patient remains Ground Zero tortured.

And now in English

[jobellestarr]

Kooky Korky said:

Is this for real???

Yup 

[No Stars In My Eyes]

"Adamant discretion dissolved in morphine" ---- / -----"Patient remains Ground Zero tortured".

Okay, then! But wth does it MEAN? 🤔

[Okey Foley, BSN, RN]

"bowel obstruction likely d/t all the p***s the pt ate"

We notified Dr and it was corrected to
"bowel obstruction likely d/t all the peanuts the pt ate". 🤣🤣

[BeatsPerMinute, BSN, RN]

Order blooper by a resident:

To administer potassium 80mEq IV continuously in one hour (with the 20mEq/50cc bags). 

I told him that I was not going to do that and kindly explained why. 

[MaleICURN, BSN]

OMG. EIGHTY mEq? Maybe even by peripheral access.

[No Stars In My Eyes]

I remember waaaay back when, the end of shift charting often said, "Status quo." Then you'd have to page back to find out where, when, or how the supposed status quo started.

[Lynker, LPN]

An order I recently D/C's due to being a duplicate and containing a swear word...

"Monitor laying, sitting and standing BP every sh*t"

🤣😂