Charge nurse hates me? and overall nasty attitude of coworkers

[Tooimpatient]

I just need some serious input here (and please no rude comments, I've seen enough of nurses jumping all over each other on this website).

First off let me say this, I am most definitely NOT a mean person, at all. If anything I'm probably too nice. I am a hard worker and while I am a new nurse (8 months in), I'm sure I have plenty of flaws but I do everything to the best of my ability and try not to leave anything unfinished. With that being said, let me get to the story.....

There is one particular charge nurse who I feel just hates me. Everyday I work that she's there I have a horrible day, can't keep up to save my life, I have the worst group of pts, endless new admissions, etc.....when the other charge nurses are working I don't have this issue.

**What is the policy where you work if they send a nurse home early??? for example, do they have a certain amount of time to finish up their work before they leave?***

Once before my name was in the drawing to go home and I "won". I had a few meds due and I didn't wanna leave my coworkers with anything more to do than I had to so I gave out my meds first (I had seen plenty other nurses do this before so I figured it was custom to tie all loose ends before you go). Well it took me about 40 minutes or so to finish my charting, give a few meds and give report to the nurses getting my pts. She blew up on me and said from now on if I have anything to do to let her know and she won't put my name in the drawing.

Well today I was picked to go home. All meds were given PRIOR to the drawing and I was ready to go except within the last hour an order was entered for a catheter on a pt. After I found out I was leaving I figured, no problem that never takes long I will do that before I go. Well I tell my charge nurse that I'm all caught up and ready, just going to do the catheter before I go. She tells me no, I need to go immediately and to get the other nurse to do it. Well I guess the nurse wasn't too happy about that so she complained to the charge nurse....who then proceeded to let me know that if I had anything to do I didn't need to have my name in the drawing. (let me just point out that there is ALWAYS always something to do, every nurse that's sent home early gives meds that were due or starts IVs before they go, etc...just anything they needed to finish before they left) and it seems I'm the only one she jumps on for doing this. I could have easily put in the catheter before I left and have it done in plenty of time, without making the other nurse mad at me and leaving her with it.

Not only that but 15 minutes or so after I left she called me and told me I left out something with my charting and it's against policy and blah blah blah and I have to come back and chart. I ALWAYS chart everything....everything. I checked over and over to make sure nothing was left out so it was an honest mistake. Its something that I've seen many nurses forget to do before and I've never known of them being called in to finish it. I don't wanna go into too much detail to give myself away but does this sound right to anyone? Several of the nurses I had to give pts to were talking about me with each other (some others I work with heard), I just feel like there's been alot of unnecessary meaness going on.......

[nurseladybug12]

Shes a passive aggressive bully. I dealt with one and I left. Please research bullying in nursing, there are so many articles on it. I would look for a different unit to work on, I left the first one I was on and I am soooo happy I did because all of my co-workers now are nice, teamplayers, professional, and respectful. I would not even bother bringing it up to anyone, I would just get a Plan B and C and move on. Dont even give 2 weeks when you do find another job, tell them you are being bullied and leave and dont feel bad about it. Honestly, she's probably fat, ugly, older, and is jealous of the great qualities you have and the bright prospective future you will have since you are so nice and helpful and therefore you must pay!

[heron, ASN, RN]

... Honestly, she's probably fat, ugly, older, and is jealous of the great qualities you have and the bright prospective future you will have since you are so nice and helpful and therefore you must pay!

Huh? Are you trying to start drama in a thread that has already complained about posters "jumping" on each other? Or is this sarcasm?

As a fat 64 year old woman with only so-so looks, I hope it's the latter.

[IrishErin]

Dont even give 2 weeks when you do find another job, tell them you are being bullied and leave and dont feel bad about it. Honestly, she's probably fat, ugly, older, and is jealous of the great qualities you have and the bright prospective future you will have since you are so nice and helpful and therefore you must pay!

Yes, this is most certainly the way to squash "bullying in the workplace". Calling your coworker fat, ugly and old....? I hope you were joking. Or being sarcastic.

I agree that the situation that OP is in is NOT a nice one, and even only knowing her side of it there is definitely something wrong. I do not think the best way to try and fix it is to quit her job with no notice. How will that help another nurse coming into that situation?

I agree with previous posts to document the situation, ask for crystal clear instructions from the charge nurse as to what she expects so that if something arises it can be lead back to what the charge nurse instructed OP to do. And knowing the correct policy involved always helps! Good luck! I have death with several 'strong personalities' in a position of power in the workplace and it is never easy.

[Tooimpatient]

I actually went through 12 pts that shift. I may have started out with 6 instead of 5 I can't remmeber now but if did count up the day it happened and there were 12. So I was correct to assume she maybe could have at least helped me do the new inpatient hospice admission on the computer? I didn't know if helping with stuff like that was her responsibility or not.

Splitting hairs here, but if I'm reading correctly, you actually had 11 patients.

Multiple discharges/admits/transfers can be much more difficult to juggle than simply walking into a (5-7) patient load, and caring for those same patients all day. There is an ever-expanding amount of jots and tiddles to take care of in coordinating that level of patient turnover in one shift.

I am "not there," and I don't know you, so I can't take sides one way or the other. Given the little I have to go on, however, if it were me I'd be planning ahead-- if you catch my meaning.

At the very least I'd be asking myself a lot of questions.

Welcome to the crazy world of nursing. :)

[Tooimpatient]

i understand that and I have tried not to take it personal, I've let it roll off my shoulders for 8 months now and think, eh that's just how she is so I do what she asks and smile about it. And at first I just thought it was a coincidence I had a bad day when she worked....that we were just really busy. But I'm just recently realizing it's ALWAYS when she is there. Last few weeks I worked with the other charge nurse several days, they were actually good days too! I came home less stressed and feeling better about what I had actually had time to accomplish in my shift, then inbetween those good days I worked with the other nurse once, it was a terrible day and I had the craziest most demanding group of pts. Next day with the other charge nurse things are back to normal.

So I've realized there's something wrong here. I can't keep letting it go when I feel it compromises pt safety bc of my workload.

Also so yesterday I was thinking back at the time of day and I realized the nurse she sent home early before me was there almost an HOUR before she left. The CN said nothing to her. Heck if I had close to an hour I could've easily done that catheter and then some.

First off, please remember this is work, not your personal life, so a charge nurse "hating" you is not in the realm of things. This is not personal, it is professional.

I would inform the charge nurse of the tasks that you need to finish, and if she wants you to do that, or to just report off and go. If the other nurse is upset that she needs to do things for your patient that you are handing off, then that is something that nurse needs to bring up with charge. It is not your choice at that point. And I would be the first to say "I am giving you report and leaving, per charge RN".

Your patient load does sound outrageous. But again, I would ask for the charge nurse's assistance if you need help. "Could you put these orders in for me" whatever you need.

If charge is less than helpful, I would go to the manager. You should not be afraid to go up the chain of command. Patient safety is paramount in any unit, and this seems like it could be patient safety issue if you have a lot of things happening all at once.

Good luck

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

With the charge nurses with whom you have a good rappaport with, I would ask "For my reference going forward, days when you are not in charge have become stressful due to patient load. Is it part of a charge nurse responsibility to help with entering orders on new admissions when tasked with a number of heavy patients? DO NOT get into "because the other charge nurse stinks, hates me, is a broad with issues....." just ask the question and see.

Then, I would be clear on what the charge nurse expects before you leave, and you need to be clear on what you need from the charge nurse. Anything else can be directed to the charge nurse (ie: you leave me with a foley to do kind of issues)

No one says you need to smile and throw a glitter parade. The style of the charge nurse is just not in sync with your practice. Turn the tables and be clear and professional on what the charge needs to do for you. There is a way of saying (and some units have a policy that a charge nurse is to be updated every few hours on where their nurses are at with their patients) "my patient load is heavy, and to take another admission, which I will start on right away, could you please put in the orders for me?" Make sure that you make use of your CNA's (even if they are shared) and check in with them. "Room 873 needs to be turned and repositioned every 2 hours. Lets go do that now, so I can assess her, and then again when I bring her meds. Does that sound reasonable?" You need to communicate without emotionally involving yourself in the fray. Say what you need, and if your needs for safe patient care are not met, you need to have discussion about this with someone higher on the food chain.

[T.H.R.N.]

People like her are utterly exhausting. Isn't it amazing how one negative person can just destroy the flow. When you worked with the other nurse and everything was normal-ish...lets you know this is most likely her baggage not yours. Like others have said these kinds of folks are everywhere. That direct approach in front of other staff members as mentioned earlier is a good avenue to take. Top spin lob her crazy right back into her court. Hang tough and good luck. I hope you can find a crew that fits like a glove.

[HappyWife77, BSN, RN]

How do you guys make any money going home all the time? Who cares if the charge doesn't like you....your there for your patients.

[Tooimpatient]

I dont care if she likes me or not, but obviously when she has the ability to make my shift a living hell I do care about that....??

How do you guys make any money going home all the time? Who cares if the charge doesn't like you....your there for your patients.

[Tooimpatient]

And of course I am always there for my pts. My pts always love me I go above and beyond what is needed to make them happy and be there for them all. At least several pts each shift thank me for all I've done and tell me they're glad to have met me. No lie. I love my peeps

[Guttercat, ASN, RN]

Honestly, she's probably fat, ugly, older, and is jealous of the great qualities you have and the bright prospective future you will have since you are so nice and helpful and therefore you must pay!

Jaw, meet tarmac.

Unbelievable.

[NicuGal, MSN, RN]

Why on earth would someone tell her to be unprofessional! Really? Great advice.

You have to be the one to go forward and try to change this. If it doesn't work, look for another job, give the proper notice, tell them in your exit interview why you are leaving. Then put it behind you.