Can we talk about burnout again?

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Hi Everybody. This is an invitation for advice and for others to vent. I've been an ICU nurse for two years now. I have a good unit with great, supportive co-workers and relatively decent staffing. I had a great orientation and learned a lot. I worked a lot of overtime out of necessity for bill-paying purposes.

Now the (newish) problems: I am exhausted even when I get enough sleep, I rarely feel happiness anymore, I don't believe in God anymore (I don't know if this is job related or not), I'm so disappointed in myself and in other people. My patient's families drive me crazy. The nursing students assigned to me drive me crazy. The doctors drive me crazy. Alarms and bells ringing make me want to run screaming. I feel like I can't stand one more minute of that ugly, smelly, depressing place.

When my patient's condition gets worse or they are in pain that I am unable to fix, I feel like an utter failure. I go home and obsess at night about what I did wrong, what I should have done differently, how I caused harm to my patient that day.

This is all new for me (well, except for the obsessing about how my day went). I'm a hard worker and a nice person. I worked today and was able to do my job adequately if not well. My patients' and their families liked me -- even requested that I please continue to care for them in the following days.

No one could tell that every smile, every measured polite response took huge emotional energy for me. In fact, I felt like I was inches away from falling to pieces with every new request someone made of me. My every action was driven by pure guilt and fear of harming someone. Some of my co-workers today commented that I looked very tired, but no one else can tell how bad I feel. I think I'm having a nervous breakdown. There was no one event that led to this -- it's just hit me and I feel like I can't step foot in that place one more time. I'm absolutely dreading it. My attitude is AWFUL and it's just truly not me to be this way. I am rolling my eyes and sighing a lot. Obnoxious, ignorant behavior that I would have let roll off my back a few months ago now makes me feel very bitter.

I guess I'm burned out? I'm supposed to work tomorrow (my 4th 12hour shift in a row...something I do all the time) and have a nursing student with me. I'm sure my exhaustion and pained responses to almost every conceivable nursing situation will affect her experience negatively. Help. :(

For the record: I am looking for a different job. I'm worried about my sanity and my patients in the next few weeks and whether I'll feel this way in my new job. Thanks.

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Specializes in ED, Rehab, LTC.

Is it possible for you to take some time off??? You sound like you need a break at the very least. I am sorry you're having such a hard time, I wish I could offer more advice.

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Thanks. I can't really take time off d/t school loans, mortgage, etc.

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Specializes in ICU, CCU, Trauma, neuro, Geriatrics.

3 or 4 days in a row off is usually feasable. Plan to do something special just for you, a hot bath that lasts 2 hours with candles and a glass of your favorite beverage. I love to cook so on my 'special for me days' I cook something different or an old tried and true recipe like a tomato tart or grilled jumbo shrimp wrapped in fancy ham or mandarin chicken. Buy a new book and read all day. Go for a walk at the park, zoo or aviary. Have lunch at a small restaurant at 2pm and chat with the chef.

I am having a bit of burnout also, I have been at my current job about 1 1/2 years. I am looking into traveling again as a nurse, probably the shore for fall. Maryland and Virginia are lovely that time of the year.

In 15 years this will be my 8th move in nursing, some of us just don't settle in for the long-haul at any job.

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Specializes in Med-Surg, ED.

call your employers Employee Assistance Program. THey are usually trained counselors and can help you work thru the issues you are facing. Its 100% confidential.

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call your employers Employee Assistance Program. THey are usually trained counselors and can help you work thru the issues you are facing. Its 100% confidential.
Excellent advice. I'd also speak to your own doc about this so he can rule out a physical cause (or depression, whatever) as the reason for your exhaustion and distress.

Good luck hun.

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Specializes in Orthosurgery, Rehab, Homecare.

Can you talk to your doctor or a counciler (sp?)? Does your employer have an employee assistance program (EAP)? They are confidential. Like others said maybe a few days off, even just 3 in a row, and some plans for "me time". You sound stress to the max and should be worried for your health. You are the only one that is going to look out for you. You need to take as good care of yourself as you do for your patients. If you don't you can't be there for them. Nurse yourself first.

Best wishes,

~Jen

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Specializes in ER, Occupational Health, Cardiology.

It sounds as though you are in the throes of clinical depression. That can color our outlook on anything, and therefore, our reaction to it. Please see your PCP or internist ASAP, and relate this to them. As some have already suggested a Psychotherapist or other counselor would likely be of immense help. If $$ are a concern, by all means, make an appt w/your hospital's EAP counselor. By law, they cannot reveal any details of your conversation(s) w/them. I did that once, and it was of IMMENSE help to me.

Also, don't do anything rash about your job. It sounds as though you have a pretty decent work environment, and you may be glad not to have to add the burden of a new environment to the load that you are already carrying.

Please understand that I am not diagnosing anything. As one who takes two antidepressants daily, I identified with your description of how you feel. Whatever you do, please take good care of yourself!

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Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

The burnout of nursing has been such a sobering experience, and now I'm so sober that I need a drink of rum...

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When was your last vacation? It sounds like you need a break really bad. Is it possible to take a couple weeks off? You sound like you are running on empty. Not sure a different job would make you feel better. Can you skip the overtime for a few weeks? Are you depressed? I hope that you can resolve this.

Hi Everybody. This is an invitation for advice and for others to vent. I've been an ICU nurse for two years now. I have a good unit with great, supportive co-workers and relatively decent staffing. I had a great orientation and learned a lot. I worked a lot of overtime out of necessity for bill-paying purposes.

Now the (newish) problems: I am exhausted even when I get enough sleep, I rarely feel happiness anymore, I don't believe in God anymore (I don't know if this is job related or not), I'm so disappointed in myself and in other people. My patient's families drive me crazy. The nursing students assigned to me drive me crazy. The doctors drive me crazy. Alarms and bells ringing make me want to run screaming. I feel like I can't stand one more minute of that ugly, smelly, depressing place.

When my patient's condition gets worse or they are in pain that I am unable to fix, I feel like an utter failure. I go home and obsess at night about what I did wrong, what I should have done differently, how I caused harm to my patient that day.

This is all new for me (well, except for the obsessing about how my day went). I'm a hard worker and a nice person. I worked today and was able to do my job adequately if not well. My patients' and their families liked me -- even requested that I please continue to care for them in the following days.

No one could tell that every smile, every measured polite response took huge emotional energy for me. In fact, I felt like I was inches away from falling to pieces with every new request someone made of me. My every action was driven by pure guilt and fear of harming someone. Some of my co-workers today commented that I looked very tired, but no one else can tell how bad I feel. I think I'm having a nervous breakdown. There was no one event that led to this -- it's just hit me and I feel like I can't step foot in that place one more time. I'm absolutely dreading it. My attitude is AWFUL and it's just truly not me to be this way. I am rolling my eyes and sighing a lot. Obnoxious, ignorant behavior that I would have let roll off my back a few months ago now makes me feel very bitter.

I guess I'm burned out? I'm supposed to work tomorrow (my 4th 12hour shift in a row...something I do all the time) and have a nursing student with me. I'm sure my exhaustion and pained responses to almost every conceivable nursing situation will affect her experience negatively. Help. :(

For the record: I am looking for a different job. I'm worried about my sanity and my patients in the next few weeks and whether I'll feel this way in my new job. Thanks.

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Thanks. I can't really take time off d/t school loans, mortgage, etc.

Do you get paid time off or vacation pay? You have to take care of yourself.

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Thanks. I can't really take time off d/t school loans, mortgage, etc.
Dear MarySunshine, It is time, to take care of you! It's amazing, what a change of scenery, can do for your spirit! You absolutely must, take at least two days off, and do something wonderful for yourself! Try incorporating, music, aromatherapy, and flowers into it, that helps me! I know about bills, but believe me, I've come to realize, that if you kill the goose, there will be no more golden eggs! Peace and Love!
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