Calling all moms

itsnowornever, BSN, RN · Oct 17, 2012

As a new grad I can tell you what worked for me. My kids were 3 and 4 when I started at the JC with my pre-reqs. We always made the babysitter "fun time" so they knew when I was leaving and she was coming that it was a good thing! They were going to go to the park, play in the yard, have water balloon fights, play with chalk and stuff like that. The babysitter was there to focus only on them, not the laundry, cleaning the house, running the errands. This started school out in a "fun" mode, I think, and now, my kids LOVE their baby sitter. There are days where my now 8 year old will say "When are you and dad going on a date, you need away time, you need time without us, go have fun!", I can say it honestly makes me feel GOOD that they love their sitter! (and by this point she is just like family).

When I started my BSN program I knew that was going to kick things up a notch since it was an accelerated program. By this point they were in elementary school. For the first 6 months my dad came and lived with us so I could really nail down the important classes and study 8-10 hours a day. Again, the kids got special one-on-one time with grandpa that they had never had before, and this made it special.

When my dad left and it was up to my husband and I, it got hairy. During school he'd be gone with the military for 1 month every 4th month so it was a bit tight. Again, we had to re-focus. I studied while they were in school (if they are young study while they sleep or are playing with friends) and again the sitter was there to make sure they had special time where they were the focus. On days off when I didn't have to study we really focused on them. I made sure to take one sport and be involved with that. For the kids, it was soccer (we play sports year round) so I made sure to coach their soccer teams. This gave them at least 4 hours a week where they were my sole focus and working with their team was the highlight. I know it doesn't sound like much but they loved it!

Make sure to talk to the kids about school. Talk about what you learned (easiest way to study A&P was to use live people! Point things out on their bodies and teach the kids!) ask them about what they learned. I found that watching shows like Trauma life in the ER helped me learn, so we watched it together, and I would explain to the kids what was happening. I practiced my clinical skills on them and they asked a million questions, this really helped me learn.

My husband worked days that I was off and tried to be home with them while I was in school. It's doable, it really is. Just be enthusiastic and they will be too!

anezt2 · Oct 17, 2012

Hello, I am a mother of a very active 5 year old son and work full time as a cna. I have always dreamed of becoming a nurse, but, did not think that I had what it takes. I am so glad that I have found the allnurses forum because Reading post from everyone has been so motivating for me. I plan on starting my pre req's next semester at a local cc and I'm kind of nervous because I have been out of school for a while and I know that Its going to be tough road..but I'm going to go for it!!!!!!! Thanks everyone for sharing your stories and tips, good luck and God Bless!!!

KatStat, BSN, MSN, RN · Oct 17, 2012

I'm the mom of 3, ages 4, 6, and 8. I'm in my last semester of prerequisites, and I've been accepted to an accelerated BSN program starting in January. First, let me say that this board has been really helpful to me. When I start my accelerated program in January my husband will be leaving for 3 months of military service. This is his first assignment, and it's a heck of a time to start! I'm pretty worried about how I'll make everything work while he's gone.

I've been working full time while doing prereq's full time as well. I study while my kids are in school, and they have an early bedtime, so I stay up late studying too. My job is flexible, so that helps, and I'll probably stop working in January.

One of the ways I've made it work so far is letting the little things go, to some extent. My floors aren't as clean as they used to be, I buy more convenience food (not fast food, but pre-marinated meat, packaged spaghetti sauces, and things like that) than I used to. My kids buy lunch at school every day, since that saves me 15-20 minutes a day of packing lunches. I lean on my friends, and for my kids that often means they can go to their friends' houses to play, but not have friends over very often. That helps too - when at least 1 of my children is out of the house it's a lot easier to get things done. Also, my kids take on more responsibility around the house, and I really think that's good for them. They help me with laundry, we have a lightweight vacuum, and every week one of my kids (even the 4 year old) vacuums, they take turns walking the dog, the oldest helps her brothers with their reading, and I drill them on math facts every time we get in the car. ChoreMonster.com is a big part of keeping them motivated, and I've never told them that they have to help out so I can study - it's all about working together as a family to take care of everybody - because that's what a family does. I don't want them to see my education as a burden on them.

Last thing. I have ipods and tablets loaded with education (and non-educational) games for them. I take everyone to their after school activities, and while one is doing karate or violin or whatever, the others are playing on electronic devices and I'm studying. I don't think I could do this without redeeming those hours every week through electronic devices. :)

I remind myself that this is a short-term solution to a short-term problem. Within 2 years I'll be done with school, my kids will get to see their mom graduate! And when it's time to find a job I'll be able to find a long-term solution and hopefully build my career more closely around their schedules.

Mom2ballerinas · Oct 17, 2012

Hello! I am a mommy to three little girls ages 6, 4, and 9 months old. I am in my second semester in an Adn program. When I first started the actual nursing program, my youngest was only 4 weeks old to the day. It is tough, Im not going to lie, but it can be done. Along with first grade and preschool, my girls do dance twice a week, girl scouts, ccd class, and soccer. It is a crazy schedule but it somehow works. My boyfriend is a great support, cleans the house, takes thegirls to their activities, and food shops. I do struggle with having mommy guilt and not being around all the time. There are a lot of parents in my classes as well with children of all ages too. I wish you the best of luck!

melizerd, ASN, RN · Oct 17, 2012

I'm a mom, our son is 5.5 and in full day kindergarten. My husband works 40 hours a week (8-4). Thankfully we're in a position that I am not working while in school full time.

We set up a schedule so that my husband does dinner minimum 1 night a week without ANY input from me He also picked up extra laundry duty around the house. And he just doesn't mind if things that are my responsibility don't always get done.

Each night no matter what, we eat dinner as a family and do the little homework that our son has. After that we do bedtime and bath and our son is in bed at 7:15. After that I'm pretty much MIA for school reading/work but before that it's about FAMILY first.

We're super lucky that the rest of my family lives super close and all chip in to help with our son, pick up/drop off from school on days that I can't do it. Without a LOT of family help I don't know how people do this.

I'm done in December 2013 so I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now. We just do things in 16 week blocks during the fall and spring and don't worry about the rest. It falls into place.

Stephalump · Oct 18, 2012

I'm a mommy of three kids (9, 4, and 1) and in nursing school full time. My husband works 50-60 hours a week, so we have a sitter come to our house M-F during the week. I'm not technically that old, but I've decided I'm too old and tired to stay up after the kids go to bed and study all night :)

I study a couple hours a day after lecture and take clinical days "off" from studying and then dedicate most of the weekends to assignments and schoolwork. I'm very, very tired and I may not have any hair by the time I graduate, but I have all As so far and they'll have to pull my 4.0 out of my cold, dead hands to get me to give it up.

I'm usually home by 4pm, so my oldest is only home for a few minutes before me. My middle child is in half day PreK so she only spends a free hours with the sitter and she really enjoys it. My youngest is one so I'm not really sure how he's feeling about my absence but he seems to be ok. I miss them a lot and my house is a complete wreck, but it goes by SO fast, it'll be over before we know it :)

winterlights08 · Oct 18, 2012

I'm a second-semester BSN student: a back-to-school mom with four kids (16, 12,10, and 4 1/2). The only thing that is saving me is that my three older daughters are with their father for half of the week. I don't know if I could do this with all of them home and all the driving/homework stuff! I don't work, so that also really helps. My husband is able to work from home 2-3 days a week, and my youngest daughter's preschool offers an aftercare program, so we use that 1-2 times a week if I have a late day. I went to school over the summer and my MIL was a big help then.

I have six classes this semester (and two clinicals) so I'm going a little :wideyed: but I'm managing somehow. I try and get out of the house to the library or B&N before an exam to review, and fortunately my youngest daughter puts me in line.."do your homework, you need to study!" It's definitely not easy though, and my housework has definitely slipped off..and I have fantasies about cooking a savory pot roast and actually sitting down to enjoy it..but I know it's (apparently) worth it in the end. Oh, and I am so, so, very tired. But I try and get 7-8 hours of sleep because I don't function well on less than that, but the fatigue is really getting to me. I just keep reminding myself why I am doing this and that it really isn't forever!

Skips, MSN, RN · Oct 18, 2012

I don't work.

HH_RN13, ASN, RN · Oct 18, 2012

Hi,

I thought I'd reply since I have almost made it thru my ADN program. When I started my daughter was 3 months old. I was the only person in my house who got up to feed her change her burp her and put her back to sleep for the first 5-6 months of her life every 3 hours 24 hours a day 7 days a week. I had been lucky to have school from early morning to about 4-5 Monday thru Thursday. So my parents in law watch her while I'm away. However the second I step into my house I'm back to being a mom to a very very active kid lol. She won't let me read or write or do anything. She'll sit on top of my books or yell. So I do what I can to study during her naps or after she goes to bed. This semester has been a bit easier because she's 2 and she loves Elmo lol so I let her watch while I'm reading (although its never more than a couple hours a day). So yea, if u have the resources get a nanny/daycare at least when u really need to study before tests. If ur lucky with a big family who's willing to help then even better :-) I wish u luck!

Lolita34 · Oct 18, 2012

Thank you all for sharing your experiences. I am looking forward to starting nursing school...hopefully Fall 2013:)

anezt2 · Oct 19, 2012

Thank you for your advice! Reading your post is so motivating. Congrats to you being accepted into the BSN program! Best of luck to you. :)

Mslecia20 · Oct 20, 2012

I'm trying to finish school it is extremely hard being a newly divorced single mother of four ages 12 8 5 and 2. I don't know how I can work full time and finish school. Any advice please? I still have bills to pay