was called a liar by another nurse!

RedhairedNurse, BSN, RN · Dec 1, 2009

Did you say anything when she called you this? I would have stood my ground and asked her what her problem is!!

wonderbee, BSN, RN · Dec 1, 2009

If your relationship with this co-worker has a history of being rocky, consider sitting down together with your boss to get it all out in the open. Otherwise your options are: (a) do nothing; (b) confront the nurse on your own © make a formal complaint for horizontal violence (d) consider whether it is worth it to continue employment with a place that tolerates that kind of climate.

I think your boss missed a good opportunity to pull you both into the office and have a private discussion.

SheaTab · Dec 1, 2009

With the intent of advancing the professionalism of nursing practice, I agree that a conversation is in order. I wouldn't tolerate another nurse being disrespectful to me, although, it happens more than I'd like to admit. I generally say something like, "gee, are you having a bad shift? Is there anything I can do to help? Have I said something that has upset you?" If you didn't lie, then yes, this is defamation and there is legal recourse. Making a statement like this can have an impact on your career because there will be some who might question your veracity and credibility in the future. Before taking legal action, I would probably take the "one up" and professional approach and meet with this nurse one-on-one. Tell her how her statement made you feel and ask for clarification. She may have the details of the situation confused. Alternatively, you might have missed some important details. With this in mind, go into the conversation with an open mind. However, be assertive in your right to a respectful and professional work environment. If you are unable to come to a truce or understanding, you deserve the right to maintain your professional credibility. These are just my thoughts.

Wishing you luck. Please let us know how it goes.

Best Always,

Tabitha

Diahni · Dec 1, 2009

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I doubt if you could create a "professional and respectful" dynamic with her. Take it to the boss.

caliotter3 · Dec 1, 2009

Inasmuch as the boss was present when the original statement was made and chose to do nothing then, do not expect anything to be done now should you pursue this. However, you still need to have a conversation with this person or let the whole matter slide.

rn/writer, RN · Dec 1, 2009

Many of us are so taken aback when another person says or does something outrageous that we just stand there dumbfounded and paralyzed. A better response (and one that is fairly easy to learn) is to simply say, "EXCUSE me?" in a tone of voice that conveys your utter shock and horror. The nice thing about this is that it's like throwing a flag on a football play. It says, "Wait just a minute! Something is wrong!" while buying you a few seconds to get your grits together.

In your case, after you got their attention, you could have said, "What exactly are you accusing me of?" or some other statement that puts the ball back in the offender's court. If your co-worker makes an actual accusation, the next question is, "Where did that come from? What are you basing that on?" Communicate that you don't have anything to hide and you want details. Turn to your boss and say that you want this resolved, with her help if need be.

So many times, workplace bullies get away with their stuff because they know nice people don't want to make waves. Or don't know how to make waves effectively. A lot of times when nice people can get past the deer-in-the-headlights feeling and offer calm and factual resistance, the bullies back pedal. Or they skitter away like bugs when the light goes on.

At the very least, you will be telegraphing the message that you won't just stand there and take if if she goes after you again.

You can't make another person respect you or behave rationally. You can, however, let them know you're no longer an easy target.

Katie5 · Dec 1, 2009

I was called a liar by another nurse on my job, my boss was there when she said it. My question is: is this defamation of character? is there anything I should do about this?
Btw I didn't lie...

You lost an opportunity to call her to grounds at that instant!Now it's killing you silently.It's never too late. File a complaint.Humans tend to retain the most damaging information. Your manager probably does already.

NurseLoveJoy88, ASN, RN · Dec 1, 2009

thanks for the replies. Honestly when she called me that I was dumbfounded and went blank. My boss did reply to her In my defense but I still should have said something.

rn/writer, RN · Dec 1, 2009

thanks for the replies. Honestly when she called me that I was dumbfounded and went blank. My boss did reply to her In my defense but I still should have said something.

Many of us are so taken aback when another person says or does something outrageous that we just stand there dumbfounded and paralyzed. A better response (and one that is fairly easy to learn) is to simply say, "EXCUSE me?" in a tone of voice that conveys your utter shock and horror. The nice thing about this is that it's like throwing a flag on a football play. It says, "Wait just a minute! Something is wrong!" while buying you a few seconds to get your grits together.

You made my point. Keep an indignant, "EXCUSE me," at the ready for future needs. If you go too far, you can always apologize. But if you don't go far enough, you just get to fume. :angryfire And chances are, for many of us, what feels like going too far would actually be just about right. :up:

DvaNrs00 · Dec 2, 2009

I just love the EXCUSE ME reply!!! That's perfect and is now in my arsonal!!

Girly · Jul 21, 2022

This happened to me today, the charge nurse, who has frequently bullied me called me a liar. I lost it. Not only was the comment highly unprofessional, an attack on my character, but also because her prior bullying has gone without consequences. I was outraged. I told her I was not a liar and to never say that to me. She went on to tell me she was taking over my patient's discharge (I was in the middle of the discharge process) and that the patient wanted nothing more to do with me, that I was deliberately holding up his discharge. She went on to attack me in front of another patient's room, as usual, to tell me never to speak to her that way, that I was highly unprofessional (she tells me this in front of my patient) The nerve of some people. I reached out to the unit manager to schedule a meeting and asked to be moved to another unit. The charge nurse, of all nurses, in a leadership role Who puts these people in leadership is beyond my understanding.