Bringing your *new* baby to school....

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Problem here all....recent member of class had a baby. Now, so far our school has been VERY strict about pretty much everything. Now, I understand that this student is a single mother, on assistance and struggling (well, who isn't nowadays). But anyways she was recently told by our instructor that she can bring her baby to class with her so she doesn't have to miss time. We have class one night a week and we ALWAYS have a test that night because the rest of the week we are in clinical. A lot of the students are complaining that it is distracting, granted she is pretty quiet for the most part but she gets passed around from person to person to be held for the 5 hours we are there and it IS distracting! Plus there are people in class that have had to miss class time because of "children" problems, babysitter couldn't come or whatever....these students feel it is unfair that she was given the choice to BRING her baby to class but others missed time! Something just isn't right about this situation. I don't want to sound like a mean person because I DO want to see her succeed and finish school but at the same time COME ON!!!!!! :angryfire Am I wrong for feeling this way????

Specializes in NICU/L&D, Hospice.

Do I really want to post here? Heck ya! I didn't read all of this to not reply. I just kept getting more angry with every page!

1. I don't even know where to start.

2. I got married, then moved in together.

3. Planned child #1

4. Planned child #2

5. Went to NS

6. Withdrew due to my kids being so young, and not able to make enough money.

7. Took on a new job/career. Make decent cash, love the hours, work from home.

8. Praise the Lord, I can go back to NS! (Kids older, money better, work from home very part-time)

9. Have worked hard for my grades. All A's.

10. Waiting for my acceptance letter :sleep:

11. Ready to GO!

12. I'll be damned if someone who chose a different path will impose on me something that I may not be able to recover from! I sit up front so that I minimize the distractions. Just because 97% of students can drown out noise, doesn't mean I can. I CAN'T! I am at school to learn about nursing. I know about kids, I know about hard times. Been there, done that. Right now Nursing is MY focus. Would you tell someone talking to a classmate, or popping gum to please stop? Why not? It is totally appropriate to ask someone to refrain from disrupting the class.

So...if I were in this class...I would be failing or bald. I dont want either, so something would have to change.

For all of you that say this means I have no compassion, I would seriously fail this class. That is my learning style. When I get kicked out, what is "fair" about that? What is compassionate about that? Would she "empathize" with me or just ask me to babysit for her since I'm now free? What would you suggest I do? This isn't a joke, I would not do well in that environment. How far would I have to go, to make HER life as easy as possible, to make sure she graduates and moves up in life? Should it come at my expense? The expense of my nursing education?

ps. I would be just as mad if this were my best friend doing this. The person doesn't matter, it's the situation.

To OP, I'm glad this has come to an end. If she doesn't return (my guess is she will...w/o child) there is NO ONE to blame in the class. She must take care of her own life. If she is determined, like we all are, she will come back when she is able. But her life is not our life. Of course we wish her well, but how far do we have to go to "help" someone?

Bet she has a sitter next class...:rolleyes:

Woogy

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.
Well there... hopefully that is the end of her and the kid. That'll teach her to try and better herself. The nerve of some people.

Of course, the nerve of some people, wanting the peace and quiet expected in an NCLEX prep class they invested in. :rolleyes:

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Specializes in PeriOp, ICU, PICU, NICU.

Glad to read the update. I am in total agreement with the director.

God bless her.

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Specializes in Transplant, homecare, hospice.
Problem here all....recent member of class had a baby. Now, so far our school has been VERY strict about pretty much everything. Now, I understand that this student is a single mother, on assistance and struggling (well, who isn't nowadays). But anyways she was recently told by our instructor that she can bring her baby to class with her so she doesn't have to miss time. We have class one night a week and we ALWAYS have a test that night because the rest of the week we are in clinical. A lot of the students are complaining that it is distracting, granted she is pretty quiet for the most part but she gets passed around from person to person to be held for the 5 hours we are there and it IS distracting! Plus there are people in class that have had to miss class time because of "children" problems, babysitter couldn't come or whatever....these students feel it is unfair that she was given the choice to BRING her baby to class but others missed time! Something just isn't right about this situation. I don't want to sound like a mean person because I DO want to see her succeed and finish school but at the same time COME ON!!!!!! :angryfire Am I wrong for feeling this way????

Nope. Your feelings are valid. Unfortunately, I have to say this, but bringing a child to nursing class, let alone a test....is unacceptable behavior. Has anyone complained to the Nursing Office or the Campus President? Yes, it's sad, because the person probably can't afford a babysitter, but being distracted in a class that's already hard isn't fair to you!

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So has she completly dropped out?

My heart goes out to you for the disturbance, but I also feel for this lady. She needs to graduate or those kids will become a tax burden. Yes, I am considering my own wallet! hehe :p

I would like to send this lady a coupon to a local daycare for the baby. PM me with the info.

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Well there... hopefully that is the end of her and the kid. That'll teach her to try and better herself. The nerve of some people.

I wonder if you would feel the same way if it were in YOUR class and you were not able to concentrate during the lecture to the point where it affected YOUR grade.

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Specializes in Obstetrics, M/S, Psych.
I wonder if you would feel the same way if it were in YOUR class and you were not able to concentrate during the lecture to the point where it affected YOUR grade.

I sincerely doubt it hurt anyones grade. My response was kind of tongue in cheek as the OP just seemed so pleased that this student was out. I agree the baby stayed in the classroom too long, but the selfish tone of a few of the posters has annoyed me from the start.

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.
I sincerely doubt it hurt anyones grade. My response was kind of tongue in cheek as the OP just seemed so pleased that this student was out. I agree the baby stayed in the classroom too long, but the selfish tone of a few of the posters has annoyed me from the start.

It could be seen just as selfish to assume your classmates are fine with and have to deal with an issue that they never asked for (whether the instructor approves it or not).

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The director of the program came down and saw she had the baby and made her leave and said if she couldn't find proper child care that she would have to stop coming to school.

sbic56,

Perhaps luvmy2angels can clarify but it doesn't look like the mother was booted from the program. It looks like the right thing was done and the mother needs to make proper arrangements if she wants to pursue school.

I agree that we need to be compassionate and help people who are trying to get ahead. But at what point does your help turn into being taken advantage of?

Sandy

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The director did not 'kick her out' of the program.

The director did make her accountable for bearing responsibility for her actions. Holding someone accountable and responsible does not make anyone a bad, evil or misguided person.

Nursing dx: Ineffective Individual Coping: Denial related to inability to constructively manage stressors regarding childcare. This prompted her to establish appropriate coping strategies and boundaries.

It is within the context of rules and social norms in which we live. Unfortunately, some people are raised to believe that they are the exception to every rule. Others like to take advantage of a situation, the "give them an inch, they'll take a mile" syndrome.

The woman had daycare, she chose not to use it. This is not about someone that had absolutely no option. This is not about a one time emergency situation where she had no other option than to bring baby to school. This is about someone that was apparently so self-involved that she wasn't able to see how destructive her demands were on her classmates over weeks of classtime.

I don't see anyone 'gleeful' about this girl's situation. What I do see is a sense of general relief that her classmates would have the integrity of their learning environment restored.

~IMBC

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.
What I do see is a sense of general relief that her classmates would have the integrity of their learning environment restored.

Exactly....

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Specializes in Geriatrics.
Do I really want to post here? Heck ya! I didn't read all of this to not reply. I just kept getting more angry with every page!

1. I don't even know where to start.

2. I got married, then moved in together.

3. Planned child #1

4. Planned child #2

5. Went to NS

6. Withdrew due to my kids being so young, and not able to make enough money.

7. Took on a new job/career. Make decent cash, love the hours, work from home.

8. Praise the Lord, I can go back to NS! (Kids older, money better, work from home very part-time)

9. Have worked hard for my grades. All A's.

10. Waiting for my acceptance letter :sleep:

11. Ready to GO!

12. I'll be damned if someone who chose a different path will impose on me something that I may not be able to recover from! I sit up front so that I minimize the distractions. Just because 97% of students can drown out noise, doesn't mean I can. I CAN'T! I am at school to learn about nursing. I know about kids, I know about hard times. Been there, done that. Right now Nursing is MY focus. Would you tell someone talking to a classmate, or popping gum to please stop? Why not? It is totally appropriate to ask someone to refrain from disrupting the class.

So...if I were in this class...I would be failing or bald. I dont want either, so something would have to change.

For all of you that say this means I have no compassion, I would seriously fail this class. That is my learning style. When I get kicked out, what is "fair" about that? What is compassionate about that? Would she "empathize" with me or just ask me to babysit for her since I'm now free? What would you suggest I do? This isn't a joke, I would not do well in that environment. How far would I have to go, to make HER life as easy as possible, to make sure she graduates and moves up in life? Should it come at my expense? The expense of my nursing education?

ps. I would be just as mad if this were my best friend doing this. The person doesn't matter, it's the situation.

To OP, I'm glad this has come to an end. If she doesn't return (my guess is she will...w/o child) there is NO ONE to blame in the class. She must take care of her own life. If she is determined, like we all are, she will come back when she is able. But her life is not our life. Of course we wish her well, but how far do we have to go to "help" someone?

Bet she has a sitter next class...:rolleyes:

Woogy

Well, how right you were.....she came to class tonight with out the baby!! It's amazing how she found someone to watch her so soon when for the past 9 weeks there was NO ONE!?!?!:rolleyes: Thanks for all the comments on this ongoing saga...hopefully now we can retire this one!!

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