Being bullied at work...

Published

I'm a new CNA who graduated from CNA training in late July. I was offered a wonderful FT position with benefits on an Orthopedic station. Long story short, I made an impression and worked my butt off to get this position. I'm one of 3 FT pm CNAs on this station. I shadowed one of them for 3 days and she was wonderful. I was very happy to have such a great CNA for a coworker. Then I met the other one. Right from the start I knew she didn't like me. She would never answer my questions fully, only snap at me with her fingers and make gestures for me to follow her. She always tells me, "Come here now" instead of saying so and so in such and such room needs ______ . I'm always confused when I'm with her because she doesn't communicate with me. There are always only 2 CNAs on my station. So days when it's just her and I, we work hard, avoid eachother, etc. Until she wants me to do something; she snaps her fingers and waves her hand then points to a direction. It gives me a head ache just thinking about how silly that is. What's the purpose?

It went on like this for a while, clearly she didn't like me. I was fine with that. I just figured it would take some time for her to get used to a green CNA on her station. She has been working at this facility and on this Ortho station for 8 years. I figured it was just her being territorial and it wouldn't progress.

Until one day, it was slow, we had a lot of down time... She came up to me and flat out asked me how I happened to land a job FT in Ortho. She told me, "It's just that... I like to work with people who work". I was shocked! She started walking away as she always does and I asked her if she was saying that I don't work. She waved me away.

Shortly after, she set up two chairs in a pt's room (the pt has dementia) and interrogated me. It went on for 20 minutes. She kept asking me if I was afraid, kept repeating that she was mean. She told me there's a long list of people at the facility that have been waiting to get into Ortho and she prevented all the ones she didn't want to work with from getting in.

That's when it clicked... She must know someone that wants to get in and was hoping s/he would.

After our shift ended she followed me to my car and talked my ear off for another 30 minutes, telling me I shouldn't have got the position. Protocol should have been followed, meaning someone else employed at the facility should have had dibs on my position.

The next day she followed me everywhere on the floor. She was hovering over me. Watching me chart from over my shoulder. Watching everything I did. I complained to the charge nurse, who then confronted her. The shift ended and I was relieved that she was no where in sight. I left through the double doors and sure enough, there she was. She followed me to my car again. Asking why I went to the charge nurse. There was more involved that day, part of which includes my other post "Fake Vitals???". I had told her to her face earlier that she was stressing me out and making me flustered by hovering over me and dragging me from room to room giving me dog commands, snapping her fingers. So since I had told her to her face, I was surprised she waited for me to ask me why I went to the charge nurse.

It came to the point where I mark my shedule to let me know if it was going to be a day with her. I stress out before I go to work. I finally had a meeting with our DSD and we made plans to confront this lady today. I'm scared and nervous. I just want my first job as a CNA to be normal! I love my job but my coworker's intimidation tactics are making me fret. I'm worried for my job if she tries to sabotage me (Fake Vitals), or complains about me. My charge nurse advised me to talk to the DSD because this girl ran out two other CNAs.

I'm the first to go to the DSD. I'm afraid of what work is going to be like after this...

Has anyone ever had to confront the person that was tormenting them, having to work SIDE by SIDE with that person???

I've had the past two days off and this is all I can think about. I'm stressed. The confrontation is going to happen at the top of the shift. The lady has no idea.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in hospice.

This behavior is so egregious it's illegal. If this meeting doesn't improve things, go to your state Labor Board. Next time she follows you to your car, call the cops. I am not kidding. That is threatening behavior.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in nursing education.

Shortly after, she set up two chairs in a pt's room (the pt has dementia) and interrogated me. It went on for 20 minutes. She kept asking me if I was afraid, kept repeating that she was mean. She told me there's a long list of people at the facility that have been waiting to get into Ortho and she prevented all the ones she didn't want to work with from getting in.

That's when it clicked... She must know someone that wants to get in and was hoping s/he would.

... I'm scared and nervous. I just want my first job as a CNA to be normal! I love my job but my coworker's intimidation tactics are making me fret. I'm worried for my job if she tries to sabotage me (Fake Vitals), or complains about me. My charge nurse advised me to talk to the DSD because this girl ran out two other CNAs.

I'm the first to go to the DSD. I'm afraid of what work is going to be like after this...

Has anyone ever had to confront the person that was tormenting them, having to work SIDE by SIDE with that person???

I've had the past two days off and this is all I can think about. I'm stressed. The confrontation is going to happen at the top of the shift. The lady has no idea.

Psychotic! She "she prevented all the ones she didn't want to work with from getting in?" Who would want to work with a person like that? Where are the nurses when this is happening? What about the patients? Your manager does not see that this is happening?

Personally, if I could tolerate it, I would keep my awesome self working there just to spite her, but not at the expense of my own mental health. Is it possible that you can just laugh at how ridiculous this is? (I'm not trying to make light of your situation at all!!) But to think she got all psycho on you in a patient room. SMH.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Is it possible that you can just laugh at how ridiculous this is? (I'm not trying to make light of your situation at all!!) But to think she got all psycho on you in a patient room. SMH.

Thanks for the replies! I meet with her and the DSD in an hour and a half... I'm stressing, writing out notes so that I don't forget to mention something or let her take the conversation in a different direction.

hey_suz, LOL! You're so right. I have laughed about the whole thing because it's outrageous and silly! I've never experienced someone behaving this way before!

I just hope after today things can be normal and peaceful... I don't want her to follow me out to my car again over this.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in nursing education.

Good luck! It is stressful but you sound confident and sure of yourself. I am sure it will work out for you. :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC.

Ugggh. If she has that much time for drama, it must be an easy floor. Everyone likes to work with their friends, but if you can't, oh well. It's JUST WORK. Any time I have a problem with someone giving me a hard time, trying to intimidate me, etc I have either ignored it, hoping it gets better (and sometimes it does), or I end up telling that person off. Until they cry. After doing this job for a few years, I don't put up with any !@#$.... not like that. Lazy, cranky, anal? Rolls right off my back. Bullying me? NOPE.

It's good that you're writing things down and taking notes. Try to be objective, and insist on filing a formal grievance if this doesn't blow over (HR will try and shame you into not doing that, because they don't want to have to deal with it). Do you have a union?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Print out your story and take it with you. It will help when you are nervous to have everything written down, date, time, etc. Best wishes.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in CMSRN, hospice.

Ugh. She sounds like a peach.

I think you handled it pretty well. At the beginning it sounded like she was just hazing the new girl, to which I would have recommended just trying to be patient and learn how best to work with her. However, the constant talks you are having and the things she's been saying are totally out of line.

I ditto Wise Woman's advice to write things down so you have a list to refer to. And if, by some bit of bad luck, she doesn't get transferred to a different unit or something after your talk, just don't let her intimidate you. Ignore her except for what you need to get done. Call in your manager or security if she starts threatening you or otherwise pushing you around. Show her you're willing to take her feedback if it's relevant and specific, but that you're not going to pay any mind to this kind of foolishness.

It sucks that you have to deal with this drama while adapting to a new role and job, but you're going to be OK. This lady just sounds fragile and mean. Let us know how it goes!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in hospice.

So how did the meeting go?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

If she would ever try to follow you home after your shift, DON'T GO HOME! Drive instead to

your nearest police station. If you have a cell with you, call 911 to fill them in so someone can

be waiting outside when you get there. Don't hang up until you get there and are safe.

If you don't have a cellphone, pull into the police station parking lot and lean on the horn without

stopping. I promise someone will come running! Unlock your car, and tell them a woman who has

been harassing you at work, has followed you to your car and then made every attempt to indimidate

you, and tonight has followed you.

I guarantee when she sees where you turned in, she'll keep going, but tell the police about her

anyway, so that there will be a record of it just in case.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in OB.

One word: CUCKOO!!!!!!!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Thank you all for your advice and encouragement! Especially thank you to the advice about writing down what I'm going to say before the meeting! I wouldn't want to leave something out or let her take the conversation into a different direction! Well, the update is that I haven't seen this lady since two days before my original post! The DSDs came on their day off to have the meeting with me and this lady and she wasn't there! Magically an on call CNA was there to fill her spot! Then the next day she wasn't there! I haven't seen her since!

I was so worried and so stressed out that I was having anxiety over this whole thing and I now haven't seen her for a good amount of time. I don't know why she hasn't been working, no supervisor has told me and I haven't asked. My boyfriend thinks she caught wind of the situation and may be ducking out of the confrontation. Many supervisors (charge nurses, personnel dept., etc.) have kindly asked me how my situation was going. Embarassing, but nice that they care. Apparently a meeting was held amongst all supervisors to discuss what's been happening with this girl, as I'm not the first victim apparently...

I'm glad my employer is taking this seriously.

We'll see what happens... I'm still slightly worried to see her again and I wonder how working with her will go.

If anyone has a story of a similar situation and it's outcome I would love to hear it!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion