Being Bullied

Published

I graduated in May of 2014 and started working in June 2014. I work at "nursing home". I had 4 days of training before they threw me onto the floor. I was forced to learn the facilities polices and procedures on the fly and trial be error. I have 32 patient load and bust my hump. Sometimes staying 2-3 hours after my shift in to get it all done. Since the first day I started most of the staff were extremely helpful and taught me how things were done. All except one the nurse practitioner. She constantly and actively looks for mistakes from me. She talks down to me and in a belittling tone. She has made it quite clear that I'm to drop everything I'm doing to accommodate her requests. She also pulled me in a meeting with my supervisor chased me for calling her when there was a change of condition in her patient. She was more concerned that I bothered her and busy trying to get me in trouble that in the end the patient needed a blood transfusion. Now the harassment is getting worse. She is the only NP or staff member that has a problem with me and when other nurses make a mistake she doesn't go out of her way to report them to the DON. I have no clue how to handle this. Yesterday I had an emotional break down in a meeting with her, the DON, and the administration. They basically said that this is part of becoming a nurse and that it was worse when they were working the floor. I make mistakes I am human and I learn from them, but I don't feel that being Bullied and harassed is acceptable. What do I do. If this is how it is I really don't want to be a nurse.

Honestly, OP, until you learn to deal with this kind of behavior, bullying will follow you. It did me.

If there is one bully in the building, he/she will be drawn to you like a magnet.

Please learn to stand up for yourself. Trust me, it will change your life for the better.

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I spoke to a former coworker and she was treated the same way by the same NP. She also thought that it was because she was white. Either way I shouldn't be so stressed about working there or with this person. It's no an atmosphere that fosters team work among staff and it's damaging to the patients.

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Tech staff on my unit bully nurses and administrative staff who call them to task and ask them to do their jobs (as opposed to sitting behind a closed curtain with feet up while the unit's crazy busy and everyone else is working). Refusing to perform any patient care on a patient because the nurse "is a pain in the ass." Accusing one of the unit's most seasoned nurses and kindest people of making a racial slur (coincidentally days after said nurse had to write up another tech for very inappropriate comments made in front of patients). Same tech becoming aggressive and making inappropriate sexist comments about "women nurses."

This is just a taste of the nonsense that happens daily on my unit. Things have never and never will get better because management is so incredibly ineffective and biased and far too willing to allow bad behavior to continue as long as they perform no patient care and can remain off the floor at their many committee meetings.

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Specializes in Mental Health Nursing.

Let's not be so quick to throw the "She's more beautiful/younger than I am so I'm going to make her life hell" situations out the window. It happens in every profession, including nursing. I'm not saying that's what the OP's situation is, but I've noticed many on here are quick to dismiss it like it doesn't happen.

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Protect yourself and rephrase to DON--"Is my priority getting my medications out on time, or to round with the NP?"

Also, ask for clarification "Am I to call the NP with acute changes to one of her patients, or what is the procedure I am to follow?"

To the NP "I am attempting to do the right thing by your patients. Going forward, what is your preference?"

There are a whole lot of people who have a superiority complex. Not your issue. You can, however, ask for direct, achievable procedures so that the patient doesn't get lost in the mix of emotion.

Get malpractice insurance. Every nurse should have it. See what your other options are as far as employment.

Make sure your life outside of the facility is happy and full. Communicate in work as effectively and directly as you can.

Best wishes!

Excellent advice. I'd imagine it would result in her looking like

Cuddy_Pic_01_121007.jpg

IDK if I'd call it bullying so much as just being a nasty bee******** better not finish that thought.

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

It's not as common as people make it out to be. Lately, I have been being "eaten" (if you will) by younger and attractive staff. Most of us are sick of being classified as "old and ugly" and therefore, being "mean" due to jealousy. Where I work, that is simply not the case. It's often the entitled, younger ones who don't want to get their hands dirty, call out sick for hangover or headache, and don't want to work weekends, that I am running into. And a 30-something manager who is quick to defend them when they knowingly do wrong or are lazy--- "they are new"--- even when they have been with us in excess of TWO YEARS.

That first reply about post "old and ugly, was to cause a stir, nothing more. And it worked.

Let's not be so quick to throw the "She's more beautiful/younger than I am so I'm going to make her life hell" situations out the window. It happens in every profession, including nursing. I'm not saying that's what the OP's situation is, but I've noticed many on here are quick to dismiss it like it doesn't happen.
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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

RIGHT. What we are saying is, classifying/clarifying bullying is NOT like using a pain scale. It is NOT necessarily what the person who thinks they are being bullied says it is. There are specific definitions spelled out that make it bullying, or not. Some people who are thin-skinned are quick to cry "bullying" when a nurse is short with them (one case when the person was about to do something dangerous, an example). It's not bullying if someone does not like you or won't make conversation with you.

It IS bullying if you are targeted for attack on a routine basis, especially when others are not.

That is just a short version.

I don't think I've ever seen anyone state that workplace bullying in nursing doesn't exist, only that situations are called bullying when no bullying has occurred.
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Specializes in Mental Health Nursing.
It's not as common as people make it out to be. Lately, I have been being "eaten" (if you will) by younger and attractive staff. Most of us are sick of being classified as "old and ugly" and therefore, being "mean" due to jealousy. Where I work, that is simply not the case. It's often the entitled, younger ones who don't want to get their hands dirty, call out sick for hangover or headache, and don't want to work weekends, that I am running into. And a 30-something manager who is quick to defend them when they knowingly do wrong or are lazy--- "they are new"--- even when they have been with us in excess of TWO YEARS.

That first reply about post "old and ugly, was to cause a stir, nothing more. And it worked.

I think this is happening more often now, too. It's more of an inexperienced-eats-experienced-nurse era now. I recently had an interview for a management position at a city hospital (I didn't get it). During the interview, the DON told me that she and her "team" were in the process of getting rid of experienced nurses in favor of fresh, new nurses. She was new herself, and had just gotten the position in November 2014. The reason for her getting rid of experienced nurses was because she was focused on changing the culture and didn't want to deal with "Well, I've been here for so and so years and it's always worked this way." I can only imagine HOW she managed to get those people to leave their jobs.

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

Such ageism is not isolated to that place. It's all over. And not all older nurses are unwilling to learn or change. I embrace new learning and realize change is constant.

I am really getting tired of all the generalizations going on in this thread.

Think I am out.

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I'm older than her and she is a fairly attractive young lady she just has an ugly personality

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Specializes in MDS/ UR.

Well everyone who lives long enough (if they are lucky) are going to get old and less attractive everyday. The next generation of supermodels are finishing up pre-K this spring,

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