Are people really this rude?

bethin · May 27, 2008

The same way you did - by saying "your welcome". A few times I have inquired to why they don't say please or thank you. My favorite response to that question was "it just takes too much breath to say please". Yet, the lady could hold a phone conversation.

I actually prefer working with the younger population. I find they have more manners than the elderly.

MikeyJ, RN · May 27, 2008

I agree with the 2nd poster -- the younger population is more well mannered than the elderly/adult (in my short experience).

I once took care of an elderly woman who was A&OX3 who demanded everything from me and everything I did was not up to her standards. It was a very long day working with her. At the end of the day, I did what you did and said "your welcome". She did not respond.

JustaGypsy · May 27, 2008

Ye... People are really this rude. My best night? Tonight. People standing room only in the waiting room, my hubby comes in to be seen.. URI, fever, sore throat, and greenish drainage from his eye. The gene-pool besters in the waiting room all coming up to the window... "How long is it gonna be..." and "I came in first! WHY are they going in first..." Hubby looks at a group of the biggest offenders and says "I'm her HUSBAND and I have to wait out here... Will you knock it off already?!?" I had triage peace for about an hour and a half... God I love that man!:heartbeat

nursebrandie28, BSN, RN · May 27, 2008

That was sweet of him. I just get so frustrated that people think nurses are just there to do their bidding... We are a service type of profession, but I always tell people thank you!! I even tell my patients thank you if they have been a joy to take care of.!!

MisterSimba, BSN · May 27, 2008

I'm sorry you've been having to deal with rude people! I jut recently started volunteering, but have had great experiences so far. One confused elderly lady was calling out "Nurse? Nurse?" so I went into her room and asked if I could do anything for her as a volunteer and it turns out she just wanted her pillow fluffed and her blanket pulled up around her. I gladly did both for her and she was so thankful! Other times I just get people fresh ice water and they are so appreciative :wink2:

At another hospital I held the most beautiful (and pretty sick) baby, and the mom asked if it would be ok for her to go use the restroom since I was holding the baby! Of corse! I would have gladly continued holding/feeding the baby while she went to the cafeteria too.... poor exhausted mom!

I figure since I'm volunteering and the nurses are doing all the hard work, I'll be more than happy to get ice chips, prune juice, warm blankets, etc, especially since the patients are so appreciative of the little things I do for them!

racing-mom4, BSN, RN · May 27, 2008

Once I had the same demanding woman 70s and morbidly obese who would cough in your face during the assessment and not cover her mouth!!!

anyways come night 3 of being her nurse I was about at wits end , when she would demand "Move my blanket" I just kept smiling doing my work, so she would yell it again "move my blanket" , finally she said "hey nurse--move my blanket" and I said "oh I am sorry were you speaking to me?" she responded yes, and I responded "oh I am sorry did you want me to please move your blanket?"

PS I did say to her in not so sweet of a tone "Matilda you must cover your mouth when you cough"

ERRNTraveler, RN · May 27, 2008

PS I did say to her in not so sweet of a tone "Matilda you must cover your mouth when you cough"

I do not tolerate this- if someone is coughing and will not cover their mouth, they get to wear a mask... :)

ChocoholicRN · May 27, 2008

I had this one elderly woman whom I had been caring for for the past 3 days. I had been warned that she was been, but after the first day with her she was very pleasant with me. Always said thank you, nothing negative. Well, fast forward to the end of day 3. The aide I are were cleaning her up because she was covered in poop. (Mind you, when I cleaned her earlier she cooperated and said thank you at the end). She kept yelling and screaming, called us b****es, said we were fat, yelling that she was falling (not even close) and told us she could clean herself and that she smelled fine (definately not). I knew she was sun-downing and was starting to get confused, but her behavior was still inappropriate. I said to her "theres no reason for you to be yelling at us like this, we are only trying to help you, you've been so wonderful all day" but she wouldn't hear it. At the end, like all the other posts said, I simply said "your welcome, have a good night miss ___" Sometimes thats all you can do without going absolutely crazy.

namaste_71 · May 27, 2008

What about the flip side? How do you handle it if you see a co-worker being rude to a patient?

A family member recently had a staff RN come into a room, nearly throw a pill cup on the her table then fly back out. No hello, no info on what the med was (patient didn't know, either). Got a very short and snotty response to "What med is this? I haven't had this pill before."

Granted, the ratio on the unit stunk but still ... it takes no more time to say, "Hi. I'm Gertrude, the RN. Here's your (medicine) to help with (condition)."

She never expected anyone to hand her a warm cookie and milk ... just a shred of respect ...

S.T.A.C.E.Y, LPN · May 27, 2008

The few times when I've had a REALLY rude elderly patient, it almost ruined my night. I didn't go to university to be someone's servant. Sure, I'll fluff you're pillow for you, if you politiely ask, I'll fetch you another blanket, if you politely ask, or you need one. But the "get me this, go do that, not like that, i need this, you can leave now..." just drives me nuts. I used to tolerate it alot more than i do now, but when they start going I don't wait until the end of the shift to remind them of some manners. Ya, it may be rude, me in my 20s talking back to elderly person, but again, no one deserves to be spoken to like that. So when they start to get demanding: "go get me a pillow" I wait infront of them, and ask "please?" If they're the kind that always forget thankyou, I'll hand it to them, with a "your welcome". No sense letting them get on your nerves for the whole shift, only to let them know as you walk out.

BlueRidgeHomeRN · May 27, 2008

brandie--sounds like you got the short end of the stick with that patient. sorry your day rolled like that.

it is my considered opinion that as people age, they become even more of who they really are [dementia, illness with cognitive impact, etc, are clearly excepted..]

in other words, the sweet little old lady waiting quietly in the back was very likely a kind 32 year old forty years ago, the one who sent her child's nurses floweres after his bout with pneumonia. the snotty 24 year old coke head having a tantrum in triage will still think the world revolves around him in the year 2038 when he's ticked off about waiting for an elective surgery.

the cranky, demanding sob throwing his urinal was a cranky, demanding ogre to his wife and employees 38 years ago...the 22 year old drama queen will still be a drama queen when she gets green instead of orange jello at age 88--and complain that no on ever comes to visit her histrionic @$$ in the nursing home.

i personally do not put up with crud from anyone over the age of reason who isn't clinically impaired mentally. it's amazing what happens when you look 'em in the eye and say..

"we are doing all we can to help meet your needs , and your rudeness will not be tolerated. you are very special and unique--just like eveyone else!!!":banghead: