Any nurses understand how isolating infertility is....

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I'm not sure where to post this, but I'm in need of some comfort, I guess.... any of you ob/gyn nurses come across women who cannot have children? If so, have you any interesting stories? Thank you:)

Specializes in Peds Medical Floor.
I worked in post-partum for a few years. There were several women I took care of who were there having a baby of their own after just adopting a baby because they thought they were infertile. So having diagnosed infertility is not always permanent or a guarantee, I guess. Good luck.

This happened to someone I know. They tried to have kids for years and couldn't and like a week after they got approved for adoption she found out she was pregnant. They were terrified they wouldn't be able to adopt but have both kids now.

I can also name 2 other people who were told they could never have kids who got pregnant. One didn't realize she was until she went in for some blood work at the doctor's. She was 6 months pregnant. Her period was super irregular and she never gave it a thought. Her doc said she wished other docs wouldn't tell woman they can't as much as they do.

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I do not think it is any more the end of the world - I was not able to have children since my husband( at the time)was not able to. I hate it still - my siblings have 12 children between them - I say stop feeling sorry for your self - we will not pay dears

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Specializes in OB.

sandrabilko - your posts on this are offensive and serve no purpose. Since you are new here I'd suggest reading the TOS before posting such meanspirited things.

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I am in menopause at 36. Started going through it at 31. No eggs, no biological babies for me. It really bummed me out when I found out, occasionally I get a lil teary about it. You gotta change your perspective sometimes. It's not the end of the world for me, though I did feel inadequate for about 15 minutes :)

The biggest thing for me is, who will be there with me when I am old. That, and I would be an awesome mom :0). After some time, and working with geriatric patients, I realize that there are no guarantees in this life. I also realize that there are sooo many other options if you want a child.

That's me, however, I do understand the devastation that many women(and men) feel when faced with infertility. There is a huge industry built around this problem, so it brings me solace to know that I am not alone. I'm curious to see what the future brings regarding infertility/in vitro/sperm and egg donation. It is truly fascinating.

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I am in menopause at 36. Started going through it at 31. No eggs, no biological babies for me. It really bummed me out when I found out, occasionally I get a lil teary about it. You gotta change your perspective sometimes. It's not the end of the world for me, though I did feel inadequate for about 15 minutes :)

The biggest thing for me is, who will be there with me when I am old. That, and I would be an awesome mom :0). After some time, and working with geriatric patients, I realize that there are no guarantees in this life. I also realize that there are sooo many other options if you want a child.

That's me, however, I do understand the devastation that many women(and men) feel when faced with infertility. There is a huge industry built around this problem, so it brings me solace to know that I am not alone. I'm curious to see what the future brings regarding infertility/in vitro/sperm and egg donation. It is truly fascinating.

I canot have children any more either- IO feel like rubbish also.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
there are lots of people that do not have children, by choice or otherwise. they still live happy and satisfying lives. i do not believe that having children is a prerequisite to happiness.

while i agree with this, there is a very real blessing in the ability to conceive and carry a child to term when you wish to do so. unfortunately, it seems this blessing is often wasted on those who least deserve it -- crack ho's, 13 year olds and others who are ill equipped to be actual parents -- and those who would make the best parents are denied. infertility is indeed isolating, and anyone who believes that it isn't has never been there.

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You took my post all wrong. I meant whether or not nurses whom have dealt with this have anything scientifically "interesting" about this subject. Get off your high horse. I'm 29 and went through total ovarian failure at 25. I cannot have children without an egg donor. I understand firsthand how tragic infertility is because I go through it on a daily basis. I do feel like people judge me all the time because I cannot have biological children; it's like my worth as a woman is tied up in this. My mother-in-law refers to me behind my back as an "old lady who is only 29". I'm sorry about your experience and I understand that you mourn everyday for someone that can never be. God bless.

Have a great friend who did not have total ovarian failure(did tests on eggs and sperm and found nothing wrong) but had many IUIs, miscarriages, 2 rounds of IVF, surgeries and perplexed infertility doctor. MD suggested egg donor-they were on an adoption waiting list and decided this was an option they hadn't considered. Egg donor and successful, full-term pregnancy-never a regret for her and her husband of how they had their children.

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Specializes in L&D.

I work with several nurses on labor and delivery who have battled infertility. One nurse, despite all testing, was never able to conceive. She and her husband ended up adopting not one, but two wonderful boys. I find it quite "interesting" just how much their oldest boy looks just like her husband! (No genetic relationship at all.)

Another nurse was able to conceive several times with fertility drugs, and has suffered several miscarriages. So heartbreaking for her! She was able to carry two babies to term so far. She is also of a faith that it's highly encouraged to have very large families, so.....needless to say, she and her husband have not stopped trying for baby #3.

Yet another nurse has horrible PCOS and never menstruates. She was able to conceive with some fertility treatments, and has a beautiful little girl. I know she wants to try to conceive again.

Another nurse was in her mid 40's, using her last embryo, after several failed IVF cycles, and finally conceived her son. This was literally her last chance to try to get pregnant - she was done after that last embryo, and did not want to ever try it again.

I'm sure there are other nurses with infertility problems. Sometimes, especially on my unit, it's just not openly discussed.

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I struggled with infertility - severe PCOS - and didn't EVER ovulate on my own...it is isolating, but I battled that isolation by being frank and honest with anyone that asked me once I had my twins - I used injectible meds and IUI - I recommend my doctor to people that ask who I used, and I'm also very open - no one should have to suffer in silence...

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I know very well what you are going though. In my case they've never been able to figure out whats wrong with me. I had 4 miscarriages, a stillbirth, and 2 more miscarriages before I had my daughter. She was totally unexpected and could not have happened at a worse time but I'm so thankful to have her.

One of my best friend's wives was having trouble with her cycle and went to the dr. They told her she had very bad PCOS and would never have any children naturally. They put her on lots of meds and sent her on her way. However they missed something very important at her appointment. She had to have been 4 or 5 weeks pregnant at the time. She goes home and feels a bit off but thinks it's just the meds. Something came up and she put her check up off and then she finally went. They do blood work and find out she's pregnant. They send her to ultrasound and find out she's 27 weeks. She has a healthy baby girl and the Dr tells her it was a fluke and it would never happen again.

Some time passes and she finds out that the PCOS has gotten worse. They deal with it and think their family is compleate. 3 years go by and she falls one winter's day and thinks she broke something in her foot. I take her to the hospital so he could stay at home with their daughter. They happen to pregnancy test her before taking her to x-ray and it comes back positive.She thinks its wrong and they send her to ultrasound first. Sure enough she's 16 weeks pregnant. She has a healthy little boy. Her Dr told her to go buy a lottery ticket she was so lucky. They again told her she would never get pregnant again.

2 years later I have a pregnancy scare and she went with me to go buy tests. I bought a 4 pack because that's all they had in the brand I wanted. We're hanging out while I tested. Mine comes back NOT PREGNANT and She asks if she can take one for fun because she's never used a home pregnancy test. I toss her one and she takes it. We chat and almost forget to check hers. She picks it up and goes white. It said PREGNANT. She ended up taking the other 2 with the same result. Sure enough she was 12 weeks pregnant. She just had her last little girl a few months ago. She didn't trust the Dr's this time and got her tubes tied.

Sometimes Dr's don't know everything.

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