I am writing this totally heart broken and at my wits end.
I started my career as a nurse receiving compliments on what a good job I did. I felt that I was one of those people that had to do my job well and couldn't settle for any less. I had to chart well and provide the care that patients and families were more than satisfied with. They had to know they could count on me and that I was going to be there for them.
After 15 years and multiple hospital settings I have come to realize that it doesn't matter. Over the years, I have witnessed that many of hte units are run by managers and assistant managers that couldn't handle floor nursing and yet their demands on their employees are unrealistic. The people that they choose to be in charge and manage the floor are picked based on friendship and loyalty rather than hard work.
I have worked side by side with techs who run the unit and force nurses to do their work while they find time to sit on the internet or phone and then get out on time while we are stuck over finishing our work. I have walked into many patients rooms to pass pills only to find they had no water, haven't been turned or need urine emptied from urinals or pans that are overflowing. I can't tell you how many pans I have see stained with urine or feces because they don't get rinsed. How often patients are tied up in lines and cords.
I find myself picking up the slack and doing all of the jobs that countless others do not. Why can't people untangle lines? Why aren't pans rinsed from urine or feces? Why won't the techs do tech jobs and make sure people have water or that other needs are met?
In the end, what you get is punished. Punished because you couldn't get your work done. Punished because you couldn't meet everyone's needs and a patient or family felt you took too long to get to them and there was nothing you could say or do to make it right when you knew in your heart that it wasn't your fault. Instead, the blame is on the fact that there is too much for you to do or there is a major imbalance of productivity amongst workers.
The reason for the nursing shortage? Overworked and not appreciated and abused. You can't stick up for yourself, you can't tell them why you couldn't get things done - you can't say nothing. 15 years and nothing to show for it. I have tried nearly every hospital around and I find the negative complainers and the staff that knows how to socialize are the people that are respected and appreciated. It's not about the people that are out there busting their tails. Everyone knows there is a shortage and why but no one does anything and the biggest culprits are the administrators of the hospitals. The majority of those couldn't handle floor nursing or hardly ever experienced it at all.
I leave behind a lot of families and patients that thought I was a great nurse. But when you can't please one in a hundred or more you are a bad nurse. People don't understand the level of demands on a nurse. It is a downright abusive field with little to no appreciation surrounded by many people who are disappointed with their jobs and their choice in the career.
My final blow: After 3 years of sweating to please my last employer and taking the abuse of never hearing anything good - only bad. I went back to agency and went back to a hospital that I worked at 3 years ago. I knew that this hospital had a bad reputation for poor bedside care. Half the staff of any unit could easily be float and agency. The regular staff on the floor was made up of mostly young girls in tight spandex and inviting clothes working on socializing with doctors and hanging out at the desk all day long. Call lights were on non-stop but these girls would not answer them. The techs were busting their tails here. The agency nurses were working but the in house floats were sitting and socializing too. I ended up with a patient with a very bad attitude that was a complainer and law-suit happy. She was furious that for 4 days not one person followed through with obtaining her records from another hospital. It fell on me. I also had a patient admitted with respiratory distress which she shared a room with and could see I was busy. With her personality, she was angry at the moaning of the elderly lady who couldn't breath and was determined to get me to stop and cater to her to get on those records. When I got my respiratory patient stablized, I did just that. Turns out that the other hospital never received any fax requesting the information. This lady hated every person she had contact with at that hospital and wanted to call an agency to get them shut down. I'm sure you know the type by now. So....guess what. I was told today that I was not welcome back because of her complaint. I would literally pull a chair up and sit next to this lady and let her vent. I gave her my heart and I got booted. The nurse that she had the next day was a guy that sat around socializing and didn't care one bit about her. He was regular staff and he was NOT going to go out of his way. They all get to keep their jobs but the nurse that took the time out to take care of her is out the door.
I need a job or I wouldn't take the abuse. But, I know for a fact that this hospital is never going to get it. They were like that 3 years ago and now they have more floats and more agency staffing them. This is a big and reputable hospital.
The hospital I worked at for 3 years was dumping more and more tasks on the nurses and they were all unhappy and complaining. We lost good hard working techs and they were replaced with people who didn't want to work or nursing students who were tired when they came to work and were kicking their feet up taking it easy. Management loved those people.
I suffer from spinal degeneration and pain and I never get to sit down. My job is harder because they are not pulling their weight.
There is nothing left. I still owe for my loan and I am scared to death to take another nursing job. I know it is not going to be any different. I hurt. I lost my insurance and after all that I worked for I have nothing to show for it but bills and a destroyed ego and heart. I feel as though I am the misfit. I am the one who isn't right. I am wrong. I can't even bring myself to waste time on another application since I don't want anything to do with this career any more. I am going to lose my home, my vehicle and everything else.
I have noticed that the field is being taken over by young graduates who are more worried about looking sexy and socializing than working. Patient satisfaction has gone down the tubes and the senior skilled nurses are getting nowhere in this field. There is nothing anyone can do. We all know it is happening but we can't do anything about it.
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
---every time I re-check this thread, I'm reliving the experience.
Hmm, maybe that's partly why I am struggling a bit right now w/ depression and anxiety, and getting "sick" lately. My physical sx were not so bad (flu - twice) but combined w/ the emotional, I have been kind of retreating from life lately. Ugh.
I need to get back to looking FORWARD, not back... there's something to be said for processing where I've been but I don't want to go back into mourning... sigh...
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.
I hear you.........I've been having a rough time of it lately myself, but then again, I've got a sister living with me whom I'm very worried about, work has been unusually stressful these days, I'm scared for my daughter in Iraq, I just passed the anniversary of another daughter's death, and winter drags on and on. I even had to bump up my antidepressant dose recently, and I haven't had to do that in years.
I just keep thinking, "This, too, shall pass"........it always does.:)
I hear you.........I've been having a rough time of it lately myself, but then again, I've got a sister living with me whom I'm very worried about, work has been unusually stressful these days, I'm scared for my daughter in Iraq, I just passed the anniversary of another daughter's death, and winter drags on and on. I even had to bump up my antidepressant dose recently, and I haven't had to do that in years.
I just keep thinking, "This, too, shall pass"........it always does.:)
wow marla, i didn't know your sister is living with you.
i know she's had a tough time of it these past few yrs...
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.
Thanks, Leslie. Like a cat, I always land on my feet somehow. That's probably because despite my tendency to depression, I'm an incurable optimist---I figure it's gotta get better, right?
Besides, there are some subtle signs that things may start to turn around soon. I just was given a clean bill of health after a suspicious mammogram required a second round of films and ultrasound. At long last, I've been able to confront my sister honestly about her pill problems (something that used to intimidate the hell out of me) and at least gotten her to acknowledge that there IS a problem. I'm hearing from Melanie as often as she can get to a computer. And warmer days ARE coming, no matter what the weather may be right now........my yard is proving to me all over again that God brings everything back to life in the Spring.
Yep, I'll be fine by and by........thanks for the confidence-booster!
It would be to the state, and yeah, as someone said, you accept the assignment you are kind of stuck w/ it. But still if this is the general rule as to staffing, I'd report the place to the state. Nothing changes as long as you seem to be able and the work keeps getting done! And that is pretty much universal.
if let go and report them the place will stack numbers and make it look good and make the reporting person look like an idiot ( exactly what i did and they got away with it even though the state went in and checked - ) it will make one look like you are just mad at them and reporting because they fired you- not good as they can then go after you for "retaliation" -
if still working there one can get canned for "something else " ( like i did cause they found out it was me who turned em in to state) and it is almost impossible to prove retaliation on thier part ( though it os easy to get the unemployment after taking em to court for that and prove you didnt do whatever they say you did - but not state wise as a retaliation case) - anyhow- this is just what i have learned fom experience and state to anyone considering the approach of reporting to weigh it well and be absolutely sure they cant play the numers and trust me they can quite adequatelky usually.
i do not recall the exact numer and such that is required by state but its not as much as one thinks- and the office will have a copy of it in a big book but they wont usually share it ( i was shown by my next employer who showed me how they did it but sorry i didnt pay attention as i just didnt care by then as i know i will neve ever report a p;lcae for lack of staffing or anything unprovable without a LOT of signatures and imean signatures of other staffg on a LEGAL document - cause i also learned even if they say " oh we will stand behind you they will not when fced with the looss of thier job))
well, any way, when she called, she asked the million dollar question.....why did i leave my last job. reading my posts here.....you can imagine where i went with it. turns out i'm not ready to go back. if i so much as talk about it or think of it i get sick. i have had lots of heartburn. couldn't eat today. i can't even smoke - weird. so, i quit. was smoking 2 packs a day on that job. never even smoked a pack a day before. now - maybe 1-5 cigarettes. i think only 2-3 yesterday. i'm pretty sure it's ptsd.
wow, you hated your job with a passion! lol anyway, you are close to the retirement age. what were you passionate about before you became a nurse? did you have any other career options before you went into nursing? it is never too late to change careers. if you have a bachelor's degree, in anything, you can go and work somewhere outside of nursing. if you hated nursing that bad, do not go back! you might have to downsize a little bit while you are trying to decide what your next career move is. maybe you need to just rest for a while or detox from what you've been through and try another area of nursing. don't make decisions based on emotions. right now you are tired, and you might make a better decision for yourself after you have rested and detoxed. just get some rest and spend time with jesus, and cast your cares on him for his burden is light and his yoke is easy. anyway, i hope this helps and i hope you make the right decision for yourself. only you can make that decision. :hgu:
The above reply was for Brokenhearted RN, I don't know why it quoted zoeboboey's name.
Hmmm, she quoted me.
The anti-depressant thing is ridiculous. We have to take pills to do our jobs?
I'm on Cymbalta for my neck and back (or alias Fibromyalgia). It's NOT TOUCHING my mood at all.
We will see how I feel tomorrow. I'm thinking I am ready to try a nursing home or homecare. I really don't want to work for ONE place. I don't want all my eggs in one basket. I did that years ago and I'm going to do it again. That way, things start getting crappy at one, I just won't go help out.
I say that now and tomorrow I might become a basket case. I haven't felt anxious thinking about it today. I just need to be able to think about it without feeling sick. I know I can't go back to any hospital. I'm sick of their abuse. Anything but!
I keep getting offered California contracts. Maybe I should go see how there staffing is, take some time to enjoy the coast, get a place with a gym (see them in pictures) work out and lose weight??? That just hit me tonight. See if the staffing changes they made is making a difference.
The above reply was for Brokenhearted RN, I don't know why it quoted zoeboboey's name.
Hmmm, she quoted me.
The anti-depressant thing is ridiculous. We have to take pills to do our jobs?
I'm on Cymbalta for my neck and back (or alias Fibromyalgia). It's NOT TOUCHING my mood at all.
We will see how I feel tomorrow. I'm thinking I am ready to try a nursing home or homecare. I really don't want to work for ONE place. I don't want all my eggs in one basket. I did that years ago and I'm going to do it again. That way, things start getting crappy at one, I just won't go help out.
I say that now and tomorrow I might become a basket case. I haven't felt anxious thinking about it today. I just need to be able to think about it without feeling sick. I know I can't go back to any hospital. I'm sick of their abuse. Anything but!
I keep getting offered California contracts. Maybe I should go see how there staffing is, take some time to enjoy the coast, get a place with a gym (see them in pictures) work out and lose weight??? That just hit me tonight. See if the staffing changes they made is making a difference.
I hear you.........I've been having a rough time of it lately myself, but then again, I've got a sister living with me whom I'm very worried about, work has been unusually stressful these days, I'm scared for my daughter in Iraq, I just passed the anniversary of another daughter's death, and winter drags on and on. I even had to bump up my antidepressant dose recently, and I haven't had to do that in years.
I just keep thinking, "This, too, shall pass"........it always does.:)
Melanie, you are definitely a survivor. I always thought I was but I think it has burned out of me.
I hate hearing about any of our kids in Iraq. My son is a corpsman in the navy and I was lucky so far. I thought for sure his first assignment was going to get him to Iraq because of the base he was stationed at. He didn't go because they had shipped so many out. He is up for tour soon so I have no idea what I am in store for.
My step son is in Baghdad as a contractor. He was right under the most recent shelling on Easter. He actually had 5 months left on his contract but I think he is coming home after this most recent bombing. He is not military.
I pray for our children in Iraq very often. I can't wait til we can get out of that place.
Liddle Noodnik
3,789 Posts
Hmm, maybe that's partly why I am struggling a bit right now w/ depression and anxiety, and getting "sick" lately. My physical sx were not so bad (flu - twice) but combined w/ the emotional, I have been kind of retreating from life lately. Ugh.
I need to get back to looking FORWARD, not back... there's something to be said for processing where I've been but I don't want to go back into mourning... sigh...