Quote from BamaBound2bRN
I think the whole process of letting the birth mother interact with the baby is a grave injustice to the adoptive parents!:angryfire :angryfire :angryfire My wife and I had been trying to have children for 12 years when we decided to adopt, and the hosptial had this practice of "Creating Memories". We took our daughter home and 18 MONTHS later, the sheriff showed up with papers taking OUR baby from us to give to the birth mother!:angryfire :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE HELL WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH BECAUSE OF THIS PRACTICE
WHOA WHOA WHOA!!!! I am really sorry for what you had to go through, but speaking as a birth mother, I have to tell you that obviously there was something wrong with your adoption because the ONLY way she could have taken her baby back was if her rights were never formally terminated! I had my rights as a birth mother terminated in court 8 weeks after I had given birth, and the judge made it perfectly clear to me that after signing that paper, I was reliquishing every and all rights to my daughter. The adoptive parents were also aware that at any time during those 8 weeks I could request to have my daughter brought back to me. As I said, I'm sorry for what you went through, but there was obviously a glitch somewhere in the whole adoption process, and it had NOTHING to do with the birthmother having her baby with her in the hospital!
Just to give you an idea of what I went through.....I had my baby the whole time with me while we were in the hospital. I fed her, changed her, bathed her. I wouldn't let her stay in the nursery unless absolutely necessary. I talked to her, sang to her, kissed her and loved her every way I could during those precious few days. I NEVER wanted her to feel unloved or unwanted. I wanted her to go from my loving arms to her mother's. Do you have any idea how important those pictures were and are to me? Do you know how many days I cried holding her receiveing blanket and smelling her scent? Do you know that I went away to college 4 weeks after giving birth, and I carried those momentoes between college and home because I was deathly afraid of a fire starting and I'd lose what little memories I had of my daughter? Do YOU realize that I cried EVERY DAY for 3 full months, before I finally began to heal? And, most importantly, do you realize that even though I had those things, I STILL gave up my rights to my daughter.
I am truly sorry for what you went through, but you are totally out of line to blame what happened to you and your wife on the hospital and their practice of giving birthmom's something to hold on to while going through the most difficult thing in their lives. Please, place the blame where it belongs, and that's on whoever didn't make sure the birthmoms rights were terminated at the beginning.
Despite my rant, I do wish you and your wife peace in the future.