Matt Lauer Fired due to Inappropriate Sexual Behavior. Has This Happened to You? - page 4

Heard this am about this from NBC News: Matt Lauer fired for inappropriate behavior. Here is the NBC video regarding the announcement. What is your opinion? Have you encountered sexual... Read More

  1. by   ChristopherB
    Quote from ElvishDNP
    Agreed, 100%. The male victims of Kevin Spacey's abuse should be supported and believed just as the female victims of [insert whatever powerful man is behaving badly today, because tomorrow there will be another].
    As a man, I can say its not just men who sexually harass other men. I've experienced sexual harassment from female coworkers. Everything from inappropriate comments about my physical appearance and inappropriate sexual comments to inappropriate touching and grabbing. When it was witnessed by other female coworkers, they laughed and thought it was funny.

    It started within my first 2 months after graduating when I was still a new nurse on orientation. One of my preceptors looked up up and down then said to me, "You have strong legs. I like men with strong legs. They can thrust hard and give it to me hard. That's what I liked my husband at first." If I said anything close to that to one of my female coworkers about her physical attributes and sex, I'd be out of a job and probably facing a lawsuit.

    At that hospital I experienced several other incidents of inappropriate sexual remarks and a few inappropriate touches and grabs. I left to do travel nursing and continues to experience inappropriate sexual remarks and inappropriate touching and grabbing at work at several other hospitals.

    In addition to that I had an experience in the last week of one of my travel nursing assignments where a married female coworker sat on my lap, put her arms around my neck, and told me her husband was out of town. She invited me to come over that night after work and spend the night with her. I told her I don't get involved with married women. She said a few other things to try to convince me to come over that night, but I declined repeating that I don't get involved with married women. Later in the shift she told me the offer still stands if I change my mind.
  2. by   wondern
    OMG, that is just wrong!

    not to mention lewd and disgusting, ChristopherB. Glad you stood up to those women! Did it feel humiliating and embarrassing???

    I still agree it probably happens to most all women though. It's about time it's coming out more!

    Matt Lauer always creeped me out a bit with those too tight suits. You could tell he thought he was all that. He had a secret button installed under his desk to close his office door. Who does that???

    Also Kevin Spacey's victims were children as well I believe?!

    There are predators among us!
    Last edit by wondern on Dec 2
  3. by   nursekayde1978
    Just like sexual harassment, bullying, and hostile work environments are often times ignored by administration. It has become common fodder for patients to do as they please without repercussions.
  4. by   gab2soon
    I am a RN on a cardiac unit. I had a male patient who made a inappropriate comment while his wife was in the room.I reached down to pull his bedrail up and my breast touched his arm. His creepy remark was "Did you like that ?" His wife giggled. Double Icky !!! I said no and told him not to say anything like that again, when I was in the room.
  5. by   peacockblue
    I don't recall ever being sexually harassed in the workplace or otherwise.
  6. by   adnrnstudent
    I haven't read all the comments and I hope someone has already said something similar.

    Matt Lauer supposedly physically touched.

    I am a male nurse and I "sexually harass" every single female on my unit and they do it right back. I wouldn't have it any other way, we are family. I have NEVER touched a coworker without her permission and if anyone was ever offended, I would stop immediately with that person.

    We got a new bladder scanner on our unit and a few of the nurses said "Come on, let's test this thing on you and see that thing you got." And of course I let them.

    Work would be boring if we didn't have fun with each other. It makes us closer and family.

    I ask coworkers all the time to show me their "t word." Heck, I did it tonight.

    Once again, if ANYONE ever asked me to stop, I would.
  7. by   kbrn2002
    Quote from Ruby Vee
    It's probably happened to a lot of people you know; you just don't know about it. I'm willing to bet that at least 1 in 4 of the people you know have been harassed in a big way, something that would result in felony charges or in the toppling of a privileged male from his tower. And I'll bet MOST of the women you know have been subject to uncomfortable and unwelcome advances. They may not have told you about it for a number of reasons, but the first one that springs to mind is that you don't seem open to hearing about it.

    Never had a married male doctor invite you to dinner because "the wife is out of town"? Never had a physician put his arm around your shoulders and "accidentally" brush your breast with his fingers? Never had a prominent physician tell you "You'd be really pretty if . . ."? or tell you to smile more? (Never hears them tell the male nurses to smile more.) Never had someone stand too close to you on an elevator, in the OR, in rounds? Never had anyone grab your ass or pinch you as a "joke"? Never had one loom over you as you're charting and tell you about how he's had fantasies about nurses? Never had someone rub his crotch over your ass as you're standing on the subway, trying to pretend this isn't happening? Never been described as "the one with the biggest knockers" by a male colleague? Never had a cop tell you he'd tear up your speeding ticket in return for sexual favors? Never been called out (while a news crew is taping an interview of Dr. WorldFamousInfectiousDiseaseSpecialist) for being over weight -- as if that were any of his business or his concern.

    The list is endless, and I'm willing to bet that MOST women have suffered from sexual harassment. The thing is, we were always told it wasn't that big of a deal and we should just get over it. Now we're being told differently.
    Honestly. No I've never had anything like that happen. Worst thing I've dealt with is a drunk in a bar, though that was bad enough. I guess I have been fortunate that the men I've worked with have been good men. It probably helps that I have been with the same employer over 20 years and harassment is definitely not tolerated there. I'm not saying that nobody I work with hasn't been harassed but I am still pretty sure that it didn't happen at our workplace. Heck, the place is such a gossip mill that I'm fairly certain word would have gotten around. Seems like in this place most people are pretty open with revealing personal information no matter how bad.
    Last edit by kbrn2002 on Dec 4 : Reason: On phone, sorry
  8. by   buffalobilly
    By today's standard of what harassment is my original statement makes sense. Women can be just as crude with approaches, comments, etc. but men must be men and deal with 'things' because....well....we're men and that's what we're supposed to do. Grew up around women my entire life, I'm in nursing school, etc. and I promise there is a double standard. I do, however, feel for the women who truly deal with some atrocious crap. I have seen instances where you have people who cry foul over trivial garbage and this does nothing more than water down the testimonies of the aformentioned example. This subject can only go so far on a website and comments will be redundant soooo...hitting the eject button on this topic. God bless everyone
  9. by   wondern
    "Don't make it about women versus men, make it about equality versus oppression."~Lauren Campbell, from the website Quora, 4 Answers - What do you say to people who defend sexism against boys and men in response to sexism against women? - Quora
  10. by   not.done.yet
    I have been slapped on the behind by a male nurse I was working with....as in...hand pulled back and *SMACK*!!...after he gave me report on a patient.

    I have had a physician run his crotch over my back end when I was bent over doing something work related and a congenial smile as if he had somehow just complimented me by doing it.

    I have been propositioned for oral sex with the proposition being repeated multiple times even after I was very clear in my disinterest in said activity.

    I have had flowers left on my desk in a very public way even after it was made clear I wasn't interested, spurring a LOT of talk and speculation among coworkers and embarrassment for me.

    I have had patients proposition me and comment on my body shape, size, etc in ways that had nothing at all to do with the care I was providing.

    On and on it goes. So yeah. I have had this happen to me.
  11. by   not.done.yet
    Quote from adnrnstudent
    I haven't read all the comments and I hope someone has already said something similar.

    Matt Lauer supposedly physically touched.

    I am a male nurse and I "sexually harass" every single female on my unit and they do it right back. I wouldn't have it any other way, we are family. I have NEVER touched a coworker without her permission and if anyone was ever offended, I would stop immediately with that person.

    We got a new bladder scanner on our unit and a few of the nurses said "Come on, let's test this thing on you and see that thing you got." And of course I let them.

    Work would be boring if we didn't have fun with each other. It makes us closer and family.

    I ask coworkers all the time to show me their "t word." Heck, I did it tonight.

    Once again, if ANYONE ever asked me to stop, I would.
    Yep. And that person would be totally accepted and not feel at all like an outsider for objecting to inappropriate work behavior by your entire unit, right?

    See, that is the problem. You have a culture of this going on there. It creates pressure to submit to it, keep silent about it, go along with it and/or accept it or participate in it whether they are comfortable with it or not. Who is going to come forward in that climate?? It is wrong and unprofessional. To say that sexually inappropriate behavior makes you a "family" is just....deluded.
  12. by   Christy1019
    Quote from not.done.yet
    Yep. And that person would be totally accepted and not feel at all like an outsider for objecting to inappropriate work behavior by your entire unit, right?

    See, that is the problem. You have a culture of this going on there. It creates pressure to submit to it, keep silent about it, go along with it and/or accept it or participate in it whether they are comfortable with it or not. Who is going to come forward in that climate?? It is wrong and unprofessional. To say that sexually inappropriate behavior makes you a "family" is just....deluded.
    ^^ This! Thank you for wording it better than I would be able to.
  13. by   wondern
    I got asked by an attractive MD once just in passing if I'd like to go to a hotel and watch dirty movies together? I was so embarrassed. I answered, "No, thank you."

    He was married, I think w children, and so was I. Wonder how long it took for him to find someone else?

    Was that just a 'horny guy' assertive question or what??? It just felt inappropriate and objectifying.

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