Sandy storm is en-route I feel it's strength echo in the wind that cautions me vigilance. My husband ,who is a Srgt.in the NYPD , has already been called in and is expected to be on duty for a minimum 48 hrs. I am here with my children and received "that" call, the one where I am sitting here wrestling with whom do I serve?
My area of work is an off site facility but as we are on disaster status I am expected to show up .The the hospital requires me to be in at 7am prepared to stay there through Tuesday am. The hospital has no concern for my children or situation that would mean in my case they would be left here alone. I ask myself questions like "Is it abandonment to not show up? Could I be fired ? Where do I stand legally if I choose my children's safety over patient's? As I sit here contemplating I am also thinking I know I can't be the only nurse making this decision tonight.
I consider, Have I not shown up before for emergencies through my 20 years of service. I have walked through snow to my thighs to receive a 25 pt load because only myself and one other nurse felt it our duty to show up.I have arrived in a blackout, on my night off ,in 2 different colored flip flops because it was all I could find scrambling in the dark.There I was left manning the ED cardiac unit alone with 2 active chest painers and no doctor in sight. I stood in the ED on 9/11 waiting for patients while my own husband was down there and I didn't know if he was safe.
I am aware as I'm writing this I am relieving my own conscience that the truth is I have already decided that this time I am not going to show up.
For weeks after hurricane Katrina I thought of the nurse's those who both stayed and those that didn't and how they each felt as the water gradually rose up. I couldn't in my own heart arrive at a decision would I have stayed with vented patients or raced home to my family instead.
So I am inviting a discussion that when faced with an emergency is the call to serve greater or to serve family first? Personally, I am not leaving my children,my mind is made up but the consequences of the decision I am yet to find out